Lover of Turians
by Siha Krios
Summary: Sequel to Love of Turians. Shepard is still grieving the loss of Nihlus. Will she find solace in the arms of another turian? or will Garrus' growing affections go unrealized and un-noticed? Begins w/destruction of Normandy & runs ME2 story arc.
1. Death

The Normandy dropped out of FTL. It always made Shepard a little nauseous before the brief moment of vertigo passed. She was on the crew deck, in the mess actually, trying to eat her lunch. She suddenly didn't feel like eating. She took her leftovers to the trash and washed out her bowl. The slight clink of ID tags under her shirt was drowned out by the quiet mummer of the people around her. She'd started wearing Nihlus's tags as well as her own after she survived the encounter with Sovereign's remains. It made her feel closer to him. Made her feel safer. She took a few seconds to examine the strange scar on her finger before falling to the floor when the ship made a hard turn to port. What the hell was going on up there? Her irritation became alarm when the Emergency Alert Sirens rang out throughout the ship.

"Brace for evasive maneuvers." Joker's voice came over the com shortly before the ship swerved to starboard, the port again. The Normandy lurched again. This time it felt more like weapons impact. She had to get up there, now! She pulled up on the table. She had been thrown across the room. Down the armory hall consoles started exploding, fires were breaking out. Pressly would have to handle this alone for now. She had to get those fires out. Several more hits. Now the crew deck was aglow with red blazing flames. Screw the fire. They had t evacuate. The kinetic barriers had were down if they were taking this kind of damage.

"Everyone evacuate! Move, move, move!" She shouted. People started running. Shepard ran to her locker and grabbed her gear. She put it on as she made her way to the rear console to punch in the evac codes. Something behind her exploded and someone screamed. A male. Shepard moved faster. She was finishing the prep for the distress beacon when Garrus ran up behind her. She put her helmet.

"Shepard!" Garrus shouted to his friend over the explosions. He hadn't know she was going to be here. It was just a feeling. He ran here as soon as the alarms sounded. He just had to get to her, to make sure she was ok. He didn't have many friends on the ship. If he could only save one, well, he owed it to Nihlus ,as a fellow turian, to save Sonya.

"The distress beacon is ready for launch." She said as she turned to him.

"Will the Alliance get here in time?" He asked, clearly worried they wouldn't.

The wall behind Garrus erupted into flame with another explosion. Sonya grabbed an extinguisher. She herd the turian grunt as he braced against a rail. The console she'd just been using went fuzzy then died.

"I'm not doing this so they can find our frozen corpses." She blasted a burning console with white foam. "I need you to get everyone onto the escape shuttles." She tossed him the extinguisher.

"Joker's still in the cockpit. He won't abandon ship." Garrus blasted a blazing console with the foam. "I'm not leaving either." He looked at Sonya over his shoulder.

Blue sparks flew from disconnected wires. Sonya looked at Garrus. Was he crazy? She typed in a few more commands into a console before running over to him and taking him by the shoulder.

"Get to the damn shuttles! I'll haul Joker's crippled ass outta here." She was serious. Seriously pissed that someone was tearing her ship apart.

"Commander?"

"Get the hell outta here, Garrus!" She pointed toward the exit.

"Aye, aye." Garrus nodded before running to the shuttles, urging others along as he went. He heard the buzz of the evac shuttle doors unlocking.

"Everybody in," He shouted. "Go, go, go!" pushing each crew member in by the shoulders. The last one to board died when an explosion threw her several feet, frying off her hair. Garrus took her place. "If anybody's listening, please get her out safe." He muttered the prayer under his breath as he locked the safety harness down. His was the last to click in place and the shuttle ejected itself away from the Normandy. A heavy knot settled in his stomach as he watched the Normandy quickly growing smaller and saw the thing that was attacking them. It was like no ship he'd ever seen and it was turning the Normandy into scrap. But that wasn't why he felt sick. Part of it was the lack of sufficient inertia dampers. Most of it was knowing Sonya was still on that burning swiss cheese of a ship.

Shepard launched the distress beacon then, turning on her heels, ran for the stairs to the command deck. She shielded her face reflexively with her hands from the heat of the flames. The left stair was blocked, so she took the right. The doors hissed open and she stepped through the emergency barrier. It took her a few seconds to process what she saw before she could prompt her body to move. The galaxy map, the surrounding consoles... they were all destroyed. The entire over head area was missing. She could see the pale blue haze of the planet they'd been scanning glowing above her. It looked like a gigantic, space-dwelling shark had taken a bite out of the Normandy. Blue sparks sprayed out from destroyed consoles. The only sound she could hear was her own breathing inside the helmet. Shepard forced herself to take the first step. Her boots had automatically engaged the zero gravity magnets that held her to the walkway. She was trying to run, but the best she could manage was a stroll. She pushed past the floating, empty chairs of crew men. Wires and tubes hung like guts from ruptured bodies of a female ensign and... Pressly! She turned her gaze away from the floating bodies. She couldn't look. She finally passed through the barrier keeping Joker from being sucked out into space.

"Mayday, mayday! This is the SSV Normandy! We've suffered heavy damage from an unknown enemy! Mayday, mayday! Do you copy?" Joker was still trying to maneuver the ship as he sent out the distress plea. "Common baby, hold together. Hold together."

Shepard charged over to his chair and slapped a hand on the head rest.

"We've got to get out of here!" She could see the determination on his face. He loved this ship, but it was a thing, and she wasn't going to let him die for it.

"No! I won't abandon the Normandy!" Joker mouth was set in a thin line behind the oxygen mask. "I can still save her!"

Shepard ran to the barrier to look out side. Something exploded. She ran back to Joker.

"The Normandy's dead, just like us if we don't get the hell outta here."

"No! I just have to... Oh, no! They're coming around for another attack!"

Shepard turned to see the beam of yellow light that was slicing through her ship. It was all the motivation she needed. She grabbed Joker by the arm and hoisted him onto her shoulders.

"Ow! Watch the arm!" Joker struggled to get to his feet. She was taking him whether he wanted to go or not.

Shepard mostly drug Joker to the last shuttle. She helped Joker to climb inside. The beam shot through the Normandy causing another explosion. The blast burned her skin, even through the suit. She instinctively grabbed at the pain. It was definitely time to go. Another explosion. It sent her flying, conveniently to the eject button for the escape pod. She wouldn't have enough time to the shuttle herself.

"Commander," Joker shouted to her. She heard his desperate cry though the com in her helmet.

"Shepard!" He knew what she was thinking.

She slapped the button and the escape pod's door slammed shut. Joker's screaming protests silenced, reduced to his face and mouth moving in almost comical snarls, as the small craft was jettisoned into space.

The yellow beam sliced through the ship. More explosions and Shepard was flung from the carcass of the Normandy. Pieces of the hull, and other debris glanced off her armor as she spun slowly, helplessly out into space. She watched the alien ship destroy what was left of the Normandy. It was like nothing she had ever seen before. It was defiantly not geth. The outter hull seemed to be made of rock. It was as if it were the spawn of a asteroid..Rage and frustration swelled within her. A few thousand meters away she could see some of the evac shuttles. Further off than that the first of the Alliance ships were arriving, dropping out of FTL. The crew would be alien ship shot one last beam, completely decimating the Normandy, then disappeared as quickly as it had come in a flash of silence.

Space was cold, and getting colder. The thermal collectors in her suit couldn't warm her sufficiently against the void of space. She could still hear her own breathing inside the helmet. She could hear the oxygen from the small reserve thank on her back feeding into her helmet, but it sounded... wrong. Shepard reached behind her in a panic, the tubes feeding the oxygen had been severed. She was going to suffocate, and soon! She struggled, trying to grab the tubes, to reconnect them or close them off and maybe give herself a few precious seconds. Maybe enough time for a ship to pick her up. She grabbed at her neck, she was suffocating. She was trying to scream, but to no avail. It was getting harder to breathe, her chest was tight. She couldn't force any air into them. The vacuum of space was stealing it from her, compressing her lungs. Her limbs grew heavy and numb. Her head was pounding from the lack of oxygen in her blood.

The sun was rising around the horizon of the planet below. It's rays blinded her as she perisheded. Her body began to fall toward the surface, caught in the planet's gravitational thought of Nihlus. Would she finally be with him again? Could humans go where turians went, if anyone went anywhere at all? Her vision went black. The pain stopped. The last throbs of her heart beat faded into the back ground. She felt the sensation of falling, or maybe flying... then there was a light. A small pinpoint in the vast emptiness. She felt compelled toward it. There was something familiar about it. She could smell grass. She felt no fear.

Garrus was watching intently. He saw the last pod eject and made immediate radio contact with it.

"Shepard? Shepard, do you read me?" Garrus' voice was staticy on the com. Joker reluctantly hit the button to reply.

"Garrus, it's Joker. I've got some bad news."

That's all Garrus needed to hear. He knew the rest. He searched the floating debris intently from the small view port. The strange, rock armored ship was gone. The Normandy was nothing but pieces of metal floating in space, falling toward the planet below. She had to be out there. Had to be. He spotted some erratic movement. It was Sonya. Her oxygen tubes had come loose, or been severed. She was suffocating and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it. He slammed a fist against the wall of the pod. Static came through on the radio, then a human voice.

"...iance. Please respond. Repeat; This is the Alliance. Please respo..d."

Garrus hit the com button.

"We're ok. Get Shepard! She's spaced in the debris field. Her oxygen has been cut off! Do you copy? Save Shepard."

"We copy. We're scanning the debris for her now. We will fi..."

"Send a ship, now! She's dieing out there!" His turian temper was getting the better of him. They weren't going to save her in time. He could still see her out the view port. She'd stopped moving. Stopped struggling. It was too late. He had intended on letting the Alliance vessel know how pissed he was, but he hit the com button so hard he broke the control panel. He ignored the looks from the crew in the pod with him and glowered in his seat. He didn't speak to anyone for weeks.


	2. From the Ashes

"There, on the monitor. Something's wrong." A female voice came to Shepard's ears as if through water. The woman had an unusual accent.

"She's reacting to outside an awareness of her surroundings." Male.

"My god, Miranda. I think she's waking up."

Shepard could hear her own breathing. It didn't sound normal. A fuzzy image of a woman in white with dark hair approached her. There was a bright light, not like before, more sterile. A bald male, also human, was on the other side of her.

"Damn it, Wilson. She's not ready. Give her the sedative." The woman, Miranda, told the man, Wilson. Then looked down at her.

"Shepard, don't try to move."

Sonya tried to touch the woman's face.

"Just lie still." Miranda easily caught Shepard's flailing limb and placed it back on the med bed. "Try to stay calm."

"Heart rate's still climbing. Brain activity is off the charts!"

Sonya could hear her own breathing becoming panicked and erratic. What was going on? Where was she? Where was... the memory faded.

"Stats pushing into the red zone. It's not working!"

"Another dose, now"

They two were by consoles, arguing. This was not a good situation. She had to get up, to get out of.. here...

"Heart rate dropping. Stats falling back into normal range."

The woman's face appeared above her again. She was smiling a kind, bed side manner like grin.

"That was close. We almost lost her." the voices were going under water again.

"I told you your estimates were off. Run the numbers again."

Darkness. In the darkness a voice, but it was silent. More like a thought, but not her thoughts. She felt warm and safe. Then the voice again, or multiple voices speaking at once, all male...

"It's not you're time yet, Sonya. You must go back once more. I will be here waiting for you, my love. I am with you... always..."

A dull boom rocked Shepard from the dream. Then another. Her ears popped and the sound of explosions assaulted her ears. The surface she lay on was cold and hard. The smell of antiseptic was in the air. Was she still on the Normandy? Had she lost consciousness? She had to get to the shuttles... where was the sun rise?... where was the grass?

"Wake up, Commander." a female voice was trying to tear her from sleep over the intercom.

Shepard tried to open her eyes.

"Shepard, do you hear me? Get out of that bed, now. This facility is under attack." The voice was becoming demanding.

Shepard blinked her eyes open. It was hard to focus. Everything was blurry and swimming. She started to move. Pain shot through her jaw. She rubbed her face. What had happened face? She could feel scars or cuts in her skin.

"Shepard, you're scars aren't healed, but I need you to get moving. This facility is under attack."

Shepard sat up slowly. Another shock of pain ripped through her side. She winced and reflexively held the area in pain. She groaned. Looking out a window she saw gun fire and heard another explosion. Why couldn't she have stayed dead? She'd had enough of explosions. Had she been dead? She looked around. It looked like some kind of med bay. Maybe she had been in a comma.

"There's a pistol in the locker on the other side of the room. Hurry!"

Shepard managed to get down off the humans sized tray she was on. She tried to focus. She stumbled toward what she hoped was the locker.

"Grab the pistol and armor from the locker."

Shepard found a pistol and light armor in the locker. She dressed as quickly as she dared. She wasn't sure when or what the last thing she ate was, but she felt sure she was going to find out soon.

The com in the suit came to life with the same voice that had wakened her.

"This pistol doesn't have a thermal clip." Shepard told the woman.

"It's a med bay. We'll get you a clip from... damn it! Those canisters are going to blow, take cover!"

Shepard saw the burning canisters and took the closest available cover. How did this woman know all this stuff? Was she watching her? Was this a drill?

The canisters exploded. Shepard moved to the doors. They opened upon her approach. There was a clip of the floor. She didn't need to be told what to do with it, but the woman seemed to disagree. Another door. When it opened there was a barrier set up. Shepard hopped over it and nearly missed a shot to the head by a well meaning LOKI mech. Shepard took cover behind a crate. The woman was still saying obvious things, and something about evac shuttles. Shepard popped up out of cover and hit the mech with a well placed shot to the head. There was another clip near by. She took it. There were also some dead human bodies in black and white uniforms.

"Someone's hacking security trying to kill you."

"Oh, goody." Shepard mumbled. The woman either ignored her or didn't hear.

This didn't look like the Normandy, or an Alliance ship, but things were still exploding and she was still evacuating, only now someone was after her. She wondered if this is what it would be like from now on, bodies, explosions...evacuating. The death hunt was new, but not really. With the Reapers after all life, it was possible this would be her 'life' now. It wasn't a thrilling thought.

Shepard headed up the stairs and through the doors. Some kind of computer lab. The woman advised her to the presences of more mechs. Shepard took cover. One mech came through the door, followed by another. Four more appeared out of a supply closet. She took them out easily enough.

"Nice work, Shepard. The coast is clear."

Shepard was annoyed. She wasn't a cadet anymore. She ran to the door on the other side. When they opened she saw a hall through a window on the other side of the corridor. It was engulfed in fire. There was a heavy mech. It gunned down two human crew men. That was enough to convince her this wasn't a window didn't shatter. Good to know.

She rounded the corner. More bodies, all human. She went through the next door. There was a human male on the floor. Red blood pooled around his head. He had a grenade launcher.

"Take the grenade launcher, use it to take out the mechs." said the woman.

"Well, no crap lady." Shepard thought. She picked up the launcher, but took the mechs out with her pistol. The launcher only had three grenades in it. Better save them for something big. There was always something big. It also gave her a small grin to spite the woman's instructions. The last mech through the door exploded when she shot it. Pieced of it hit a near by container of some kind. Whatever had been it it was flammable because a wall of fire was spewing from the hole.

"Take the elevator down one floor." said the voice.

Shepard found the 'elevator' was nothing more than a lift. She took it to the floor below. There was no way around the wall of flame. She charged through it. The suit kept the heat out, but she still heard the second of sound that only fire makes.

Through the doors, another coridor.

"Shepard..." Static was cutting the link. "... do you read... Shepard...I've go... my position." It cut out after that.

More doors, more corridors. Shepard saw a small lab through a window. Maybe there were answers in there. Two mechs were crawling on the floor. They exploded before she had time to shoot them. There were two lap tops in here. She accessed them both. One brought up an image of a woman to the screen. She seemed familiar. Dark hair, white uniform... large tits. The voice was like that of the one who'd woke her. She was saying something about bio/synthetic fusion on a subject. That made her nervous. Maybe Saren was right about the future... It sent a chill through her. She wondered where the subject was and if it was worth it to save the poor smuck who got sucked into this sick experiment. It sounded like something... seedy. Something vaguely familiar. The other laptop was a voice recording. A disgruntled employee. He was complaining about his wages. Probably the guy shooting up the place. It wouldn't surprise her. She found some credits in a vault. She took them. No point in letting them burn.

Down the hall and through more doors. Someone was screaming her name. Asking for her help. A human man was banging on a window. The corridor behind him was an inferno. A heavy mech gunned him down. She had to move on. She paused for a moment to look out a large view port to space. There was a white burning star in the distance. Maybe a white dwarf or a small sun. She went through the doors on her doors opened to an open area. Shots were flying through the air. She took cover behind a row of seating. A human male with dark skin saw her.

"Shepard!" he shouted, then mumbled mostly to himself, "What the hell...?"

He was shooting at mechs across a divide. She helped him take a few out. Everyone seemed to know her name. She needed answers and this guy wasn't dead or about to be. She took her next opportunity to dive to cover beside him.

"What are you doin' here? I thought you were still a work in progress?" He asked her. Like she knew. 'Work in progress', had she been a 'subject' as well?

"I just woke up to gun fire and explosions. The last thing I remember is being spaced. If you got answers, I need 'em. Now." Her mouth didn't want to fully form the words. She probably sounded drunk.

"Damn... Sorry, I forgot this is all new to you. I'm Jacob Taylor and I've been stationed here for..." He popped up to shoot a mech.

Shepard couldn't help but notice his build. He was less a meter from her. He had broad shoulders and chest, narrow hips and a rather large bulge at his crotch. She shook her head. She didn't need to see that. She waited for him to crouch down again before opening her eyes. He smelled good, like some kind of nut and something she didn't recognize. He had a nice face, but she didn't find him attractive. Too... human. That was a strange thought. Too human? She pushed the feeling away.

"Things must be worse than I thought if Miranda's got you running around. I'll fill you in, but we'd better get you to the shuttle first."

"Ever since I woke up someone has been telling me what to do and where to go. I'm not doing anything until someone tells me what's going on." She'd had enough. She'd rather return to comma, or death or wherever she'd been before this than put up with more crap.

"Fair enough, I'll give you the quick version. You and your ship were attacked and destroyed. You were killed. Dead as dead can be when they brought you here. Our scientists spent the last two years putting you back together. You've been comatose or worse the whole time. Welcome back to your life." He was looking her strait in the eye. He wasn't making it up.

"Wait, I'm having trouble wrapping my head around this. Two years?" She didn't bother hiding the disbelief in her voice.

"The Alliance declared you KIA. The whole galaxy thinks you're dead, and we don't get to those shuttles... they'll be right."

Shepard was quiet for a moment. She let Taylor take a few more shots at the mechs. So, she _had _died. Why couldn't she remember anything from being dead? She knew she should, the memory tickled the back of her mind, but she couldn't recall it. Two years... She thought about her last moments, what she could remember. She remembered putting Joker in a pod... Alliance ships dropping out of FTL. They had been too late for her. Then, like a bubble from the depths, his name came floating to her... Garrus. She suddenly felt a strong urge to know if he was alive.

"Were there any other survivors from the Normandy?"

"I'll tell you what. You help me finish of these mechs and I'll play twenty questions with you all day."

She nodded. He told her he was a biotic. She nodded again and he lit up in blue flame, pulling two of the mechs through the air. She tested out her own biotics and sent them crashing hard to the ground below. Yep, still worked. Had some new stuff too. Nice. She briefly wondered if they'd left anything _out_ to put some crazy tech _in_.

"Ok. I promised I'd answer your questions. What do you wanna know?" He did't sound happy about playing 'Jeopardy' with her.

"What can you tell me about the project? were there other test subjects?"

"Project Lazarus only hand one subject. The whole point was to bring you back. Just you." He gestured weakly to her.

The news hit her hard.

"Why me?"

"I don't have that answer." He shook his head. "But I will get you to the person who does."

"OK. I remember the Normandy blowing up. Did anyone else make it?" She felt her stomach flutter.

"Just about everybody survived. A few servicemen from the lower decks didn't get out. Navigator Pressly was killed by an explosion. Everyone else, including the non-Alliance crew... the asari; Liara, the quarian...they all made it out alive."

"They were my team. If they knew I was alive, they'd come for me." Shepard nodded in her certainty. She'd implied all of them. Meant all of them. But she only thought of Garrus. He'd come for her when the ship was exploding around him. He would come for her. Something inside her twinged. A pang of guilt pricked her heart and made it heavy in her chest. She absently touched her chest. Something was supposed to be there, under her shirt. Something was missing...

"Maybe you can track them down once we got off the station, _if_ we get off the station." His brow knitted and he looked to the side. Something was bothering him.

"What's the quickest way to the shuttle." She was ready to go.

Taylor was about to answer when he got a ping on his omni-tool com. Someone called Wilson. That sounded familiar. They headed toward the shuttle. They would meet him on the way. A few mechs and an annoyed conversation between Taylor and Wilson and they found the bald man of the floor of server room B. His face looked like someone she should know. He'd been shot in the leg. Shepard grabbed some medi-gel from the med-kit on the wall and applied it to the wound. Wilson complained a lot. Something about the wound didn't seem to fit his story.

Taylor and Wilson argued more, about the mechs, about what Wilson was doing in the server room. She didn't care. They needed to get out of there.

"You're all strangers to me." She waved a hand at them dismissively. "Let's get some place safe and then we'll sort out who's fault it is."

They agreed with her about the same time mechs came through the doors. Wilson used his omni-tool to blow up some canisters blocking the path taking the mechs with them. Shepard headed for the open doors. It was time to get out of here.


	3. Freedom's Progress

**I've summed up some of what happens for time's sake. I hope you forgive me. I'm anxious to reunite our friends.**

**

* * *

**

Miranda was not the kind face angle Shepard had seen at her bed side when she'd woke up ahead of schedule. Wilson was the traitor Shepard thought he had been. Miranda shot him. No questions asked. Not what she would have done, but effective. Cerberus wanted her to hunt down the cause of abductions of human colonists. She remembered them, and their twisted experiments, of which she was now an example. She didn't like it, but how do you tell the devil to 'fuck off' when he resurrects your ass? She wanted to stop the abductions, so she agreed to help. She was not working for them, with them or anything else. They gave her info and funds. She did the rest.

Jacob Taylor was interesting, or at least secretive enough to seem that way. Ex-Alliance turned Cerberus, but told the boss off on occasion... She kind of liked him, but he reminded her too much of cadets fresh from Earth on their first ship or first visit to the Citadel with that 'I'm tough' attitude she expected from 20th century thug vids. Some of the old classics were still entertaining, especially the ones of that era's view of what the future would be. Sometimes it was almost funny.

Freedom's Progress. The name was perhaps a bit ambitious. The colony was a depressing little blip on the map, and a cold one. Shepard always hated the cold. Now she hated it more. They checked the first bunker. There was no one there. Taylor made a comment about everyone leaving in the middle of dinner. It was clever, but some how she thought Garrus might have said something funnier. A bay door and a few mechs later they ran into a small band of quarians. One of them seemed familiar, the voice and body language. It was Tali!

"Stop right there!" A male quarian and most all but one of the others pointed their guns at the intruders.

"Praza, you said you'd let _me_ handle this." A female quarian in purple pushed Praza's rifle muzzle down. Then looked to the intruders. "Wait... Shepard?" The disbelief was unmistakable, even through the vocal processors of her mask.

"I'm not taking any chances with Cerberus operatives." Praza gestured with the muzzle of his gun.

"Put those weapons down!" Tali commanded the others.

"Shepard? Is that... you're alive?" Tali was having trouble believing her eyes.

"Cerberus rebuilt me, Tali. In return they asked me to investigate these attacks on human colonies." Shepard told the young quarian. Tali had changed in the two years since she'd last seen her. She seemed more mature and defiantly more assertive. Shepard was proud of her, like she would be of a daughter if she'd had any.

"You'll pardon us for not taking you at your word, _Cerberus_." Praza spat at her.

"We're well within our rights to investigate attacks on a human colony." Miranda crossed her arms as she rebuked the quarian. "I'd like to know what the quarians are doing here."

"Weapons down, Praza. Whatever's going on here I don't think we need another _fight_." Tali ordered her team mate to stand down.

Veetor. He was on his pilgrimage and chose to go to Freedom's Progress to help the colony. They had seen him, but he hadn't seemed well. Probably delirious from infection, as Praza put it. They decided to work together to get to him on the other side of the compound. If anyone knew what had happened here, Veetor was it.

Mechs and flying turrets. What fun! Shepard was really wishing she'd been left dead. She'd been at peace, happy even. There was something on the other side. Something waiting for her that made her happy. Why couldn't she remember what it was? Why couldn't she remember anything after her death except that there was more? Tali came over the com to inform then that her team had gone rouge under the command of Praza. The day just kept getting better. Shepard absently pressed her fingers to her chest. Something was... missing.

They made it to the last section. Veetor was in a warehouse inside. A heavy mech stood between Shepard and answers. She knew keeping the grenade launcher had been a good move. All three lit up the mech with biotic blasts in turns to bring down the shields and weaken the armor. It was tough work. Shepard instructed them to used the heavy crates as shields, pacing around them to keep the crates between them and the mech. When it's armor was weakened enough Shepard rolled out of cover and hit it with all three grenades. The mech fell to it's 'knees' and Shepard rolled back to cover before it exploded. She had time to look around at the dead and wounded quarians. She checked several for a pulse. The ones that were still alive she helped Tali drag into a prefab for first aid. Seconds later she was looking at the back of Veetor's head. He was mumbling to himself about monsters. She worried he might not be stable enough to be of any value.

"Veetor?"

"No Veetor. Not here. Swarms can't find. Monsters coming. Have to hide."

"No one's going to hurt you anymore." She tried t console him.

"I don't think he can hear you, Commander." Taylor said when Veetor didn't answer.

Shepard used her omni-tool to deactivate the screens Veetor was so diligently working at. It cut the cycle he was in well enough to gain some intel. The Collectors had come. They used some kind of mobile stasis bot to immobilize the colonists, then they took them to their ship in pods. It was bizarre and un-nerving to watch the vid from security cams that Veetor had manually pieced together. Against Cerberus' wishes represented by Miranda and Jacob, Shepard sent Veetor home with Tali. She trusted the quarian more than she trusted her team. They had Veetor's omni-tool data. Everything they would need could be found there.


	4. Archangel

Shepard had mixed feelings about the Illusive man. He already knew what she was sent to find, lied to he about it when she'd asked him before going. But then he gave her a new Normandy and Joker was her pilot. Ah, Joker. What would she ever do without his cynicism. There was a catch, of course. The new and improved Normandy was riddled with spy ware, bugs and an AI called EDI. Joker was not happy. He called it ship cancer. Shepard thought that was funny. Too bad Joker was so damn frail... She always like a man that could make her laugh. She pawed her chest.

They were headed to the Citadel. Shepard didn't give a damn about their recommendations. She was going to see Anderson and the Council first. Maybe Anderson could tell her what happened to the rest of her team Dossiers be damned. She wasn't about to take the Illusive Man's word on where her old team was if he was set on her taking his picks. She was reinstated as a Spectre, quietly. Anderson was a Counciler himself. That was the good news. He knew little else as far as the where abouts of her team. Garrus had apparently dropped off the map after not making Spectre status. She picked up some supplies, better food rations, equipment, armor... guns, and headed back to the Normandy. She set a course for Omega. That's where the doctor was. She would need him. There was also a turian called 'Archangel'. Why was there always a turian? She pressed her hand to her chest, only this time she noticed her twitch. Why was she doing that? Why did she get this feeling that something should be there? Something like... ID tags, but not hers. Why would she wear someone else's? Her forehead tingled. She rubbed it and confirmed the destination on the galaxy map. She tried to ignore 'Kelly'. The girl was too chipper for her taste. Shepard took the elevator to 'the loft'. It was cozy. Larger than the original Normandy's Captain's Quarters. Nicer too. It had a built in collectors case for model ships and a huge fish tank for one wall. Two desks, a private shower room, shelves, two laptops, no... three, one on the lower level... It was too much. She loved it. She still hated Cerberus and that cocky Illusive Man. His eyes creeped her out. She'd smuggled a few bottles of wine aboard. It didn't take her long to finish all three. She slept the whole ride to Omega. Her resulting hang over was a bitch.

The music in Afterlife was loud with a heavy base. It made her hang over feel like a hatchet in her skull. That always made her cranky. After exchanging threats with the body guard and talking with 'Queen Aria', Shepard decided to go after 'Archangel' first. It seemed he didn't have the 'luxury of time'. She went shopping to up grade her armor and weapons, also picking up some salvaged parts from a quarian to help out her engineers. He had given her a discount, in return she talked his competition into buying him out so the kid could buy a ticket off the station. It was her good deed for the day, besides saving Archangel's ass.

How the turian and his, now dead, team had managed to piss off every major merc gang on Omega was beyond her, and impressive. She already liked him and they hadn't even met. She headed down to the recruiter. It was a Blue Suns batarian. She could find something attractive about most spices but this one. Batarians were just ugly. It was like a bull dog and some old chewed up gum had been thrown into the primordial ooze of their planet at a pivotal point and the muti-eyed alien before her is what crawled out.

"Well, aren't you sweet?" The batarian eyed Shepard as she came down the ramp. "You're in the wrong place, honey. Strippers quarters are that way." He motioned with one hand. His main eyes returned to the console in front of him. He let his secondaries ogle the female stripper, until she pulled a gun.

"You show me yours, tough guy. I bet mine's bigger." Shepard mockingly admired her weapon.

"Impressive, so you're here to fight then?" She had his 'full attention' now.

"If this is the place to go after Archangel."

It was. The batarian quickly went over the details of payment and where to go. She didn't need to know everything. She wanted to have to look at this guy as little as possible, and get out of his sights as well. She could feel him visually removing her clothes. It wasn't a feeling she liked. As she left for her under cover mission as target practice, a young human male passed her. He couldn't have been more than 18, if that.

"Hey, is this where I sign up?" He asked excitedly. He had that 'I'm tough' attitude Shepard found so amusing.

"You look a little young so sign up as a merc." She said over her shoulder.

"I'm old enough. I grew up on Omega. I know how to handle a gun." He verbally beat his chest.

"So does Archangel." Stated Taylor.

"I can handle myself." He brought out his new piece to show off. "Besides, I just spent 50 credits on this pistol, and I wanna use it."

Fifty credits was a toy. Shepard knew it. She crossed the space between them in seconds and grabbed the kid by the collar, distracting him as she took the gun.

"Get your money back."

The slammed her palm against the clip ejector, breaking the rounds inside. A toy.

"Hey! Whattre yo..."

"You'll thank me latter." She left him disappointed and pissed off at her. But if he was smart, he'd realize she'd just saved his life. If not, then she would probably end up having to shoot him.

Talking with the merc bosses was like talking to angsty teenagers. They all had valid reasons, from a merc's point of view, to hate Archangel. Cerberus had hired her very own merc, Zaeed. The Blue Suns boss happen to know him. It made getting info a little got all the info she could, not all of it of any real use. They would come in waves and they had a heavy mech. She savataged the mechs FOF systems and hacked into a few bank accounts. They weren't going to need their money soon anyway. They'd be dead. Then there was the gunship. How were they going to be able to take that thing out? She best she could do would be to prevent it from being repaired. That meant taking out the tech. Turned out 'Sargent' Cathka left his soldering iron out. He was either stupid or to trusting of hired guns. It wasn't a question he would get to ponder later.

It was time to go. This 'Archangel' kept impressing her. The mercs had LOKI mechs, heavy mechs, three barriers, a bloody _gun ship_, the merc gangs were working_ together_ to get to him and he was still alive and holding them off. He must be a hell of a guy, one way or the other.

She took out the few other mercs that she was sent in with. They were setting up an explosive under the upper level deck Archangel was firing from. She took the tech out and left the bomb. They could use it against the mercs. She headed up the stairs. Two more mercs. One was covering the door as the other was trying to get it open. She took two shots, one round each, in the head. She needed to conserve ammo for this. She was going to need it. She hacked the door and let herself in, arms at the ready. Archangel didn't turn around. He had to know she was there, maybe he was curious because she'd taken out the other mercs. He wasn't going to shoot her, so she lowered her weapon.

"Archangel?"

He motioned for her silence and patience with the wave of one talon. A few seconds later he pulled the trigger on his sniper rifle, nailing lagging merc through the head. He stood, using his rifle for support. He took off his helmet and sat on the arm of a near by sofa, propping one foot up on another. The look of surprise on her face told him how happy she was that he was alive.

When he'd seen her hop over the barrier with the other mercs, he'd thought she was just a look alike. Humans tended to look alike anyway. Then, when she shot one in the back his opinion changed. Could it be possible? She moved like Shepard, that deadly grace he'd come to recognize from any distance. He still wasn't convinced until he'd heard her voice behind him. His heart leapt into his throat. He heard his breathing quicken inside his helmet. It took a little more concentration of take out the merc hiding behind the pole. Then he used his rifle to help him stand. If it wasn't Shepard, maybe she was here to help anyway. He was getting tired.

Her hair was different, darker, and shorter. He thought it complemented her brown eyes better than the blonde had, and there was no tacky bun, but it was defiantly her. This was a story he had to hear. He left his helmet on a table and took a seat on the arm of a sofa.

"Shepard. I thought you were dead." His words sounded as tired as he felt.

"Garrus!" She threw her arms out wide. She couldn't believe it. The one living turian she'd want on her team was the same as the nut who'd gathered such a force against him. It surprised her a little how happy she was to see him. "What are you doin' here?" She almost smiled.

"Just keeping my skills sharp. A little target practice." He gestured weakly with one talon.

"You ok?" Her brow knitted with concern.

"Been better. It sure is good to see a friendly face." He nodded to her. "Killing mercs is hard work... especially on my own." The memory of the death of his team could be heard heavily in the last words.

"Since when did you start calling yourself 'Archangel'?" She asked. She kind of liked it. After everything he'd done, it suited him.

"It's just a name the locals gave me for...all my good deeds." He shrugged. "I don't mind it," he chuckled, "but please... it's," he cleared his throat, "just 'Garrus' to you." His throat felt dryer than usual.

"What are you doing out here on Omega?"

"I got fed up with all the bureaucratic_ crap_ on the Citadel." He lowered his head, mandables flexing. "Figured I could do more good on my own." He looked back up at her. "At least it's not hard to find criminals here. All I have to do is point my gun and shoot." he scoffed.

"Good to see you haven't lost your since of humor." She grinned at him.

The expression did something to him. He wasn't sure what, but it was almost worth everything to see her alive, and to see her grinning at him.

"Well, we got here. I don't think gettn' out will be as easy." She took a step toward him.

"No, it won't." He stood. "That bridge has saved my life... funneling all those witless idiots into scope. But it works both ways. They're slaughter us if we try to get out that way."

He and Shepard stood side by side looking out over the way she'd come in. Seeing her again... it brought strange feelings to him. Emotions he hadn't felt before and didn't understand. He did his best to push them away. None of it would matter if they didn't survive this.

"So we just sit here and wait for them to come kill us?" Asked Zaeed.

"It's not all _that _bad." Said Garrus. "This place has held them off so far, and with the three of you..." He looked to Shepard. "I suggest we hold this location, wait for a crack in the defenses," He found it so easy to slip into submission and let her take over. "then take our chances. It's not a perfect plan, but it's a plan." He made eye contact with her. She was ready. Her features stern. It steeled his own confidence.

"How'd you let yourself get into this situation?" she asked

"My feelings got in the way of my better judgment. It's a long story." He reloaded his gun. "I'll make you a deal. You get me outta here alive, and I'll tell you the whole damn thing."

"There numbers won't help them in here. We'll work together and then we'll share a drink on the new Normandy." She grinned. It was easier to do when she was with him.

"A new Normandy, hu?" Garrus nodded. "Let's go see what they're up to." He held the scope on his rifle up to his eye. "Hmmmm... looks like they know their infiltration team failed. Take a look." He handed her the rifle. "Scouts. Eclipse, I think."

Shepard looked through the scope. LOKI mechs. She focused on the head of one and fired. The mech's head exploded and it crumpled to the ground.

"More than scouts." She said and handed the weapon back to Garrus. "One less now, though."

"Indeed." He nodded, impressed with the shot, and the fact that the recoil didn't send her flying. It was a big gun. "We'd better get ready." He shifted his weight, focusing. I'll stay up here. I can do a lot of damage from this vantage point. You..." He glanced at her. "You can do what you do best. Just like old times, Shepard."

They took up their positions.

"Let's give these bastards everything we've got." Garrus said as he preped a concussive shot.

Battle was loud. It was always loud. Gun fire, explosions, declarations of triumph, screams and grunts of the dieing. The corrupted mech helped out, as well as blowing the planted bomb under their feet. Things were going well. They shot down the Eclipse boss in the process. Next, Shepard left Taylor with Garrus as she and Zaeed went to the lower levels. The mercs where breaking through his defenses in place down there. She had to close the shutters. The first was easy. Strait down the stairs and spray some fire. Done. The left one was a one way with lot's of barriers for cover. Vorcha, another gum in the ooze species, had flame throwers. That made the corner difficult. But Shepard got it done. The last one was the hardest. Vorcha, varren, krogan... Her shields had failed more than once, forcing her into cover until they came back online. Eventually she got the shutter door closed. She ran back to Garrus' position as fast as she could. Zaeed had proven useful in battle so far, but she knew the gunship was still to come.

Garrus was trying to fight off the Krogan merc boss. He was calling her for help. She ran up the stair, leaving Zaeed and Taylor to deal with the enemies she left in her wake. She wasn't about to survive death just to let some krogan lizard kill her best friend. She fired several rounds from her shot gun into the krogan's back as she came through the door. Garrus was keeping the krogan from charging him with a sofa between them. Shepard wasn't so lucky. Her shields did little to protect her from the impact. Her armor had taken the blunt of force, but she could feel the bruises already forming. Garrus fired a concussive shot, knocking the krogan down long enough for Shepard to get up. It reminded her of Saren on Vermire. She unloaded her pistol into the krogan's face. There wasn't much left of it when she was done. Her face was hard, her lips a thin line.

"Thanks, Shepard."

"Any time. So, what now?"

"Only the Blue Suns are left. He won't be expecting us to meet him head on if we take our chances now..." Garrus saw something out of the corner of his eye. It was the gun ship.

"Take cover!" Talyor shouted.

"Damn it! I thought I took that thing out already." Shouted Garrus.

"They fixed it, but not completely. I made sure of that." She replied.

Garrus shot her a look. She was a little scarier now... He wondered what else had changed.

Everyone hit the deck. Blue Suns repelled in through the windows on both ends and were coming up the stairs. Shepard nodded to Garrus and left to take care of the mercs below. It was a tough fight, but with a few well placed grenades and the help of biotics, it was only a matter of time before the Blue Suns would run out of bodies. Shepard shot the last merc when she heard a voice shouting as if over loud speaker.

"Archangel!"

Loud, rapid gunfire.

"You think you can screw with the Blue Suns?"

It was the gun ship. She took to the stairs as fast as she could.

"This ends now!"

Garrus felt his body hit the ground. His ears were ringing. Every nerve in his body was on fire. He couldn't breath. He could feel the warmth of his blood pouring out of him.

"No, not like this..." he thought.

He saw Shepard running to him, blurry, before he lost consciousness. Before he died.


	5. The After

The sky above him was a brilliant, clear blue. Thin white clouds lazily wondered through the atmosphere. He could smell grass and feel the blades tickle his bare skin. He sat up with a start. His armor was gone, he was naked but he did not feel ashamed or exposed. He looked around at his serene surroundings. It was a paradise. A garden world. A white sun warmed his plates. He checked his wounds, there were none. He stood.

"Hello?" He shouted. It echoed, but no one replied. He saw a tree on a hill not far away and decided to head toward it. The sound of the grass under his feet seemed louder than it should have been. It was too quiet here, wherever _here_ was. He rested a hand on the tree. The bark was rough and pieces flaked off under his touch.

"You are dead, this is the After. If you were wondering where you are..." a voice behind him startled him.

"Who are you?" He asked. He had taken an aggressive posture, hunched and slightly crouched, talons ready to attack, teeth bared.

The stranger before him was slightly taller than he was with darker carapaces. His face was painted white. Bright green eyes regarded him calmly.

"I was Nihlus Kryik. The name should sound familiar to you." He said.

Garrus shook his head.

"By the spirits..." He breathed. He'd never really bought into that stuff. Apparently one did not need to believe it. It just was. He relaxed. The last few minutes of his life came back to him. "Shepard." He breathed. She was there, right there when he... He didn't want to think about it. He returned his attention to the turian before him. "You were Shepard's life mate... She still mourns your death, even after her own."

"Yes, I know. As brief as our time together was, the bond created was a strong one, surpassing even death. She stayed here for a time while Cerberus rebuilt her. She was not allowed in the city, so we have a place of our own out here." He gestured with one hand to the foot hills behind him. "Something has happened. I am unsure what... but the bond is weakening, holding on by a thread." Nihlus paused, trying to hide his pain. Her absence was the only pain he felt in this place.

"I don't understand. A _human_ came _here_?" Garrus didn't hid his astonishment.

"I don't completely understand it myself. But she was allowed to return here."

"Return?"

"When the arm of Sovereign fell on her, she died, and came here. That time it was only a few moments, and she was only allowed to see the area she occupied. Our ansectors sent her back."

"Why?" Garrus was getting more confused.

"That is not for me to tell you. I am here to send you back." He pointed at Garrus. "If the bond between myself and Sonya should be severed, you must protect her." Nihlus eyed Garrus carefully. "If a new bond is created... she may be allowed to return again when her bond mate dies. If not, I do not know what will happen to her spirit. I bonded her to this place with blood."

Garrus' eyes hardened.

"You what?" He was angry now. "How could you do that not knowing what the consequences would be?"

"I loved her. I love her still."

"If you love her so damn much why did you put this curse on her?" Garrus seethed.

"Even in death I was not ready to let go. She is the only one who has ever accepted me exactly as I am with no motives of her own. Perhaps it was wrong, but it cannot be changed now. I have paid for that transgression. I told you she was not allowed into the city. When I bound her spirit to this place I banished myself from our ancestors. It was a consequence of my actions. I cannot say I am regretful. There is no peace for me away from her."

Garrus looked at the white faced turian. They were both exposed to the other. Nothing was hidden here.

"I would protect her without your asking." Garrus said sternly. "Though it seems I'm the one that needed it." He rolled his shoulders.

"Indeed." Nihlus paused. He knew Garrus' heart better than Garrus did. He knew the feelings that were surfacing there. But he needed to protect Sonya more than he needed to protect his attachment to her. She was the one who could stop the Reapers, no one else. It was her fate. "You must return now."

Garrus suddenly felt the pain of his body. His senses could smell burning oil and hear the ringing in his ears from the blast. Blue blood stained the grass. Then everything went dark.

Shepard got to the door in time to see Garrus take a missel to the face. She heard him cry out. Sonya threw herself into cover beside his body.

"Garrus!" Her scream was quieted by her panic and the restriction of her throat tightening.

She looked at Garrus. He wasn't moving, his eyes were closed. She wasn't sure if he was breathing. Black smoke still curled around the point of impact. She peeked over her cover at the firing gun ship and back to Garrus. Her face twisted in a sneer of anger. Rage swallowed her and she erupted into an inferno of blue biotic flame. She shot everything she had at the ship, ignoring the bullets that were quickly taking down her shields. She started with missiles. She only had three of those. While she switched to the assault rifle she sent powerful blasts of biotic energy, trying to over load it's flight systems or weaken it's hull with warp. Anything she could thing of to bring the bastard down. Black smoke began to pour out behind it. She was out of rounds and she needed to give her body time to recover before she could summon any more biotic power from it.

"Taylor! Take that thing out!" She screamed at him.

Jacob herd his Commander's order and took aim with his rifle. A well placed shot to the tanks would send this bird to the scrap yard. A found his mark and fired. The ship exploded, sending debris and bits of batarian all over the place.

Shepard ran to Garrus. There was a pool of blue blood collecting around his body. She knelt down beside him and placed a tentative hand on his back. The memories of Nihlus came like a flood. She grasped at her chest with her other hand. The ID tags. That's what she was missing. She had to find them. Her heart rate quickened.

Garrus' eyes suddenly opened wide, his breath coming in gurgling gasps. He reflexivly gripped the muzzle of his rifle.

"Garrus!" She rolled him over, hoping to help open his lungs. "We're gettin' you outta here, Garrus. Just hold on." She said softly to him. Her heart felt as if it were no longer beating.

"Radio Joker, make sure they're ready for us." she ordered Taylor.

"He's not gonna make it."

The strange Irish accent of Zaeed's voice set her on edge. She shot the man a look that would have killed him if looks could.


	6. Garrus Vakarian

Shepard paced in the com room. She was waiting for an update on Garrus' condition. The com room seemed like a good place for a make shift worry circle. It was private and she could walk all the way around the console table with out bumping into something. As much as she was worried about Garrus, she thought about Nihlus.

She'd received a few messages from One of them concerned the Normandy's crash sight. Maybe she would find the missing tags there. They had not been included with her remains. She had interrogated Miranda fully when they boarded the ship after seeing Garrus off to Dr. Chakwas. She doubted the woman was being dishonest. Cerberus had nothing to gain by hiding that kind of information.

The resurfacing memories of Nihlus were almost as bad as reliving the experience of his death. She let the tears silently fall. The door was locked, so Taylor would have to beep and be let in. It would allow her to dry her face before being seen. Her heart felt heavy in her chest. It ached. Her shoulders, her back... it all ached as if she were constantly carrying a planet on her back. Only it wasn't a planet... it was the whole damn galaxy.

She had avenged her love's death. His killer was dead, but she didn't feel any better. She missed him with a renewed agony. Why did he have to die? Why did she have to keep returning to... _this_? It wasn't right. It wasn't how it was supposed to be. Something made her look at her hands. She focused on the tip of each finger. On the end of one was an almost perfect oval scar... the only one she had. Was it Cerberus' mark on her? Some kind of tag that said 'We own you'?

There was a beep at the door. Shepard quickly wiped her palms over her face to erase the wetness there and hit the key to open the door. Taylor took the side of the table opposite her and leaned over a console. Shepard matched his behavior looking hard at his face for any clue of the news he brought. It didn't look good.

Garrus opened his eyes, groggy from the anesthesia. The room was blurry, but coming into focus quickly enough. There was an older, grey haired woman in the room. Probably the doctor. He groaned when he tried to sit up. She ran over to him.

"Don't try to sit up just yet. You took a direct impact from a missile, you should be dead." She sounded impressed.

"Turians make armor to last." He tired to joke. Talking hurt. "So, how bad is it?"

"You'll be fine. You just need some time." Dr. Chakwas said. She wasn't going to go further than that.

"Gimme a mirror."

"No." Chakwas paused. "I'm afraid I don't have one here."

Garrus doubted that. She was female. Species didn't matter.

"Ok, well..." He forced himself to sit. "I'd better go see the Commander."

Chakwas tried to ease him back onto the med-bed, but he wasn't going to give up, so she helped him to his feet.

"Take it easy, ok? You should be on bed rest for at least a week." She shook her head at him.

"I'll be fine." He nodded, "Thanks doc." He tried to smile, but that hurt too, so he nodded again. That hurt less.

Each step felt like he was going to break something.

"Now I know what it's like to be Joker." He thought to himself.

He continued, slowly, to the elevator and made his way to the Command Deck. A young red haired woman looked at him when he exited the elevator. She seemed very concerned, or scared. Maybe both. He was pretty sure he was the only alien on the ship. He'd seen only humans thus far. He approached her as professionally as he could manage.

"Can you tell me where the Commander might be?" he asked, very aware that the flanging of his voice was amplified in the quiet of the deck.

"She's in the com room waiting for an up date on your status... are you ok?" She smiled sweetly at him. It hurt his teeth for some reason.

"Uh, thanks. Where's the com room?" He took a step back.

"It's just around the corner, you can go through the armory and it's in the hall." She was still smiling.

Her bright green eyes were a bit disturbing. They reminded him too much of the ones he'd seen while unconscious.

"Ok. Thanks." He nodded and moved a little quicker to the doors of the armory.

The armory was much bigger than the old Normandy. A lot of things about this Normandy were bigger and better. Updated. He wondered what her guns were like. He took the only other door in the room to the hall. He could vaguely here a male human voice.

"The doc's corrected with surgical procedures and some cybernetics. Best we can tell, he'll have full functionality but..."

The doors hissed open.

"Shepard." Garrus stood with his body profiled to the room.

She could see all most of his face, what was left of it. The side that had taken the hit was bandaged and badly scared.

"Tough son of a bitch." Taylor chuckled. "Didn't think he'd be up yet."

Sonya turned toward her friend and smiled as she crossed her arms and shifted her weight to her hip.

Seeing Shepard smile made the pain fade enough that he felt himself again. He strode toward her with confidence a few steps, then stopped at a professional distance. He didn't trust the other human.

"Nobody would give me a mirror," he said as he walked toward her. "How bad is it?" He pointed to his face.

"Ah, hell, Garrus. You were always ugly." She teased him. "Slap some face paint on there and no one will even notice."

Garrus' mandables spread in a smile as he roughly laughed. He could feel the tendons straining.

"Ah, ha.. Don't make me laugh, damn it. My face is barely holdin' together as it is." He made a weak attempt to 'strike a pose'. "_Some_ women find facial scars _attractive_," He paused gesturing to her. "Mind you, _most_ of those women are krogan." He offered a grin.

Sonya smiled and shook her head.

Taylor sensed some tension and decided he should leave. He saluted Shepard and left the room without making further eye contact with anyone. Garrus turned side ways a bit to let him by. He knew Garrus was part of her old team. He didn't need or want to know anything else.

"Frankly, I'm more worried about you. Cerberus, Shepard? You remember those sick experiments they were doing?" He studied her face.

"That's why I'm glad you're here, Garrus." She uncrossed her arms. "If I'm walking into hell, I want someone I trust at my side." She looked him in the eye. They seemed bluer than she remembered.

"You _realize_ this plan has _me_ walkin' into hell _too_." He took a few casual steps toward her and cocked his head. " He laughed lightly. "Just like old times." He paused for a moment, regarding her as she stood a few feet away from him. Something in him stirred again, those strange emotions he'd never felt before. And an intense need to protect her, ironic as it was, considering he'd just left the med bay.

"I'm fit for duty whenever you need me, Shepard. I'll settle in and see what I can do at the forward batteries." He turned to leave, pushing the foreign emotions aside.


	7. Peanutbutter

That night Shepard didn't sleep. The nightmares from the Prothiean beacons didn't haunt her so much anymore. Meditation before bed helped with that, though the need had lessened since dieing. She still found it hard to believe that she had actually died, fallen to an alien world, been recovered, pieced back together and re-animated, by Cerberus of all things, just so the Illusive Man could have her as his pet. Something wasn't right.

She'd given up being able to hunt Garrus down when no one knew where he'd disappeared to. Then, when she thought she was looking for someone else, a stranger turned out to be her best friend... Only to have him almost die on her. Fate was cruel.

Crueler still was the way her memories of Nihlus had been revived. The similarities of the wounds, the pool of blood. The first thing she did when she went to her quarters for the night was strip naked in front of the mirror. Everything was gone. Every scratch, every bite he had left on her body whether by accident or intent. All the marks of his love had been 'repaired' by Cerberus. She didn't even have his ID tags. She had nothing of him now. She looked at her finger again. If all the other scars were gone,why had this one remained? Unless it _was_ a 'tag' from Cerberus... but something told her that wasn't the case. It was deeper than that, and not so malevolent. She rubbed her forehead and tried to sleep. Her chest felt like it had when the universe was sucking the air from her body. Her heart _hurt._ She buried her face in her pillow to stifle the sounds of her weeping. Her body shuddered with the weight of her grief.

Her bed side alarm sounded at 0600 hours. She tossed her pillow off her face onto the clock, knocking it off the night stand, but not silencing it.

"Curses." She mumbled.

She slithered to the side of the bed and reached down to pick up the clock. The orange hollo display of an analog clock hovered above the projection base. She threw it against the wall. It shattered. They were to fetch Mordin Solus today. She didn't want to go. She didn't want to save the galaxy. She didn't want to get dressed or take a shower. She wanted to be dead. She'd had peace when she was dead. She remembered that much. She had been happy... She had...

"Commander," EDI interrupted her thoughts.

"Ahg... Yes EDI?" She groaned.

"You're alarm has been permanently deactivated, would you like me to set the intercom of your cabin to wake you in the future?"

"Oh... no. I don't think so." Shepard hid her eyes from the blue orb with her forearm. "EDI, just... make it smell like coffee and bacon in the mornings. If I get up, we'll do whatever it is we're supposed to do that day... If I don't, then we won't." She was being sarcastic. Something she'd learned to perfect with the constant tutoring of Garrus. EDI didn't get it.

"I cannot produce scents, Shepard. However, I can request that the kitchen prepare such a meal for y..."

"I wasn't serio... Oh, never mind. I'll buy a new clock. Please, go away." Shepard rolled over and nuzzled her head under the other pillow.

"Commander, you are needed on the command deck at 0700 hours. Be advised, it is now 0610 hours."

"Thank you, EDI." she said from beneath the pillow.

When EDI did not respond, Sonya assumed it was gone. She lay there a few more seconds before dragging herself to the shower. She washed her featureless body with as much enthusiasm as a dog has for getting 'fixed' once it realizes what's happening. She felt more naked now than when she was actually naked. Just one more thing she would miss and have to move on from.

Putting on her armor was like transforming into a different person. She wasn't Sonya, the wife of a dead turian. She was Shepard, former Alliance, Commander of the Cerberus gifted Normandy SR2 and a quietly reinstated Spectre of the Citadel Council. Militant and professional. She still liked coffee and bacon.

Going to fetch Dr. Solus taught her why she hated Vorcha. They were ugly, dumb, and would not die unless you set them on fire. Oh, and overload made them explode. That was her favorite lesson. Her least favorite was that they were very good with rocket launchers.

Dr. Solus was different from every other salarian she'd ever met. He even talked faster, if that was possible. He was also probably the oldest salarian she'd ever seen. He was a genius, and they needed him. She just hoped he still had it in him to survive combat.

On her mission to save 'Archangel', Shepard had come across a data pad with info regarding plans to over throw Aria. She would have to remember to deliver this info to the asari. She figured Aria was better than some merc bastard. At the very least, she was nicer to look at before she killed you. Shepard was more concerned with getting to the old Normandy's crash site. The trip would take a day or two.

The first few hours she pestered Joker. He had good humor about it, until she was opening and closing the view shutters just for kicks. Then he'd 'politely' asked her to 'get the hell out'. She threatened to throw him in the brig, but it was an empty threat. The over the next hour she watched the blip on the map slowly move through their virtual position in space as the Normandy sliced through the void in FTL. She didn't do that as long because Chambers decided to start talking to her. As nice as the girl was, she wasn't in the mood for 'girl's club time'. She went to the mess for some grub. Now that the nausea had passed from making the jump into FTL, she thought she might be able to keep something down. She ordered a peanut-butter and banana sandwich with chocolate sauce.

"No, I'm not pregnant." She gave Rupert the evil eye when he looked back at her with the question in his eye. "I'm not 'in that time of the month' either. Cerberus_ kindly_ left that part out."

Rupert was still giving her a look.

"Just give me the damn sandwich." She took the plate and ignored his stares.

Garrus was sitting at the far end of the table, alone. There were a few crewmen sitting together at the table on the other side of the wall. She sat across from the turian. He eyed her sandwich the same way he eyed any human food. It all looked disgusting to him, except some of the sea food... and pork roast. He just could eat it.

"So, what's on the menu, Gare." She asked, casually.

Garrus glanced up at her at the shortening of his name.

"Not much, Shep." He mocked her. "Just some nutrient paste. Best the Citadel had to offer, I guess." He nodded to Rupert.

"I'm sorry, Garrus. The next time we're in the neighborhood, I promise we'll pick up something turian and delicious." She offered a tired grin.

"Thanks. I'd appreciate that." He looked at his friend. "You look tired. Maybe you should get some rest. We still have almost thirty hours before we arrive. You can be well rested and still have time to yell at Rupert over breakfast." He teased her.

Shepard smiled back in a sarcastic 'yeah, that was funny, but you're right and I don't want to admit it' kind of way. Then she poked at her previously untouched meal.

"Garrus..." She poked a banana slice trying to escape the bread.

"Commander."

"Do you remember anything from when you were... unconscious?" She looked up at him, curious. Almost hopeful.

"I remember that there was something. A dream, some kind of vision. I'm not sure. I haven't really thought about it." He lied. "I was basically in a deep sleep. It was just a dream."

"I know it sounds crazy. And maybe I am... but, I swear I can almost remember what it was like when I was dead. I know there's something there, in that space where go go when you leave this reality. I just can't remember what it was. Like remembering you dreamed something, but not the dream itself." She paused for a moment, considering how open she was being with him and hoping he didn't jump ship thinking she was nuts. "I'm not going to the crash site to reminisce or plant that memorial, though I will do both of those things."

"Then why are you going, Shepard." He was growing concerned for her.

"I'm going to find ID tags." She said flatly.

"I know, the tags of fallen crew and servicemen, right?" Garrus asked.

"Yes, but I'm also looking for... mine." She rubbed her forehead with her palm and then dropped her hand to her chest. She played with the fabric of her shirt before picking up the sandwich.

"You have new ones, is it just sentimental?"

"Yes, but it's not what you think. I..." She trailed off and put her sandwich back on the plate. She looked him strait in the eye. "Garrus, you can't repeat what I'm going to say." She was serious. Her features were stern, but also weakened... afraid.

It un-nerved him to see her afraid of anything. He'd only known her to be fearless.

"Shepard, anything you have to say to me stays with me. I promise." He nodded his sincerity.

Sonya nodded and stared at her lunch.

"Nihlus and I... we were bonded. We kept it secret. It happened after he was assigned to evaluate me for the Spectres. I didn't know that's why he was there. When he... " She had to blink back the tears and swallow the lump forming in her throat. "After Eden Prime, I continued to keep the silence. I didn't want to disgrace his name. He deserved to be remembered with honor by his people." She grabbed at her shirt again. "We loved each other, Garrus." She looked him in the eye again. It was getting harder to tell him this, to say it all out loud, even if it was barely above a whisper. "A part of me died with him. I did something terrible. I stole some of his things from the crate that was to be shipped to his next of kin. I asked his forgiveness where he lay in a damn box, like cargo..." She had to stop. It was killing her to hear it all.

Garrus didn't know what to do. Her words both warmed him and hurt him, for reasons he didn't understand. He wanted to hold her, comfort her. But he didn't want to draw attention and possibly compromise her position as Commander. So he sat silently waiting for her to compose herself. A task which she was managing remarkably well.

"I took his ID tags. I wore them under my shirt with my own." She paused, regaining her resolve. Hardening herself so she could live through this, if she must live. "I'm going to the crash site to find them." She looked at Garrus as if he were the embodiment of her conviction.

"Do you want me to go with you?" He asked softly. He thought of nothing else, but the pain in her eyes at that moment.

"No... Thank you, but I need to do this on my own." She eyed her sandwich again, then looked back at her friend. "Thanks for hearing my confessions." She was grateful. Her confidence grew with his lack of judgment of her.

"I'll be here if you need me." He nodded. He hoped she could see and hear his sincerity.

Sonya grinned at Garrus and she finally ate her lunch.


	8. Sparing

When Sonya left, Garrus couldn't finish his meal. He returned it to Rupert without looking at him and returned to the forward batteries. He sat on a bench against the wall with his muzzle in his talons. He was glad she trusted him enough to unload on him. She clearly needed to get if off her chest. She'd carried so much alone for so long. He wasn't surprised when she told him about her bond with Nihlus. Somehow he felt he had already known. It did peak his interest in other areas. How exactly would 'relations' between the two species work? It took a 'well traveled' asari to handle a turian customer and it was still with some difficulties. How would a human be able to adjust to a turian? It had been a while since Sonya had 'been with' anyone, much less a turian... He wondered how completely Cerberus had 'repaired' her body. His thoughts wondered to fantasies of holding her naked form, running his talons gently over her smooth, impressionable skin. The fantasies were almost like memories when he shook his head clear of the thoughts.

"That was wrong." He mumbled to himself. She was still grieving for Nihuls. Besides that, she was his friend. He wouldn't taint that. He continued to mull things over as he ran some calibrations on the Javelin Disrupter Torpedoes . They would need to up grade if they were going to take on Collectors. He needed some platinum. Lots of it. He had an idea. The Thanix Magnetic-Hydrodynamic Weapon aka Thanix Cannon. He'd 'accidently' discovered prototype plans in C-sec's Specter archives before leaving the Citadel. If it worked, the weapon would certainly give them a better chance against anything that came after them.

After lunch, Shepard had focused on her reports to the Illusive Man and to the Council. She was still keeping them informed, though they didn't really want to be. That night she meditated and managed to get some sleep. Her pillow was still wet with tears. It seemed she would be crying herself to sleep for a long time to come. The visions in her mind were not of the torture and death of the Prothieans. Instead she dreamed of rolling hills and a clear blue sky with white feather clouds chasing the high winds.

The next day Shepard woke without breaking something or cursing EDI. She skipped breakfast to check the map. They would reach the crash sight in 8 hours. The anxiety started building in her chest. What if she didn't find tags? It wasn't a thought she was willing to entertain. She needed to stay focused. After spending most of the day plotting their course over the next few weeks and reading reports from every area of the ship. She still had 3 hours to kill. Shepard decided to go down to the hanger. There was plenty of space down there, and no one would bother her. She could release some tension.

She changed clothes in her cabin before heading down. The linen tunic and pants were more comfortable on her skin than the Cerberus uniform. She enjoyed the freedom of movement the clothing provided. They were turian by design, but altered to fit her shape. Stepping out to the middle of the bay, Sonya took up the first position of the turian martial art stance. She slowed the movements down into her own mesh of the turian fighting style and the ancient art of tai chi. She didn't remember ever learning it, or when she would have had time, but it was almost instinctual the way her body flowed into the movements. A feeling of peace washed over her. She closed her eyes and let the art form move her. She felt calm. The anxiety melted away a little more with each sweep of her arms.

Sonya's body slowly kicked and punched with a tranquil serenity. She looked as she were performing a graceful dance more than a style of fighting. Garrus watched quietly from just beyond the elevator doors. She hadn't heard him come in and he didn't want to disturb her. He'd come down to check the systems on the Kodiak. What he found was unexpected, and beautiful. The turian tunic she wore completed the visual appeal for him. The emotions he'd been battling floated to the surface of his mind. He wondered when she had learned the martial style, and if she would allow him to join her if this became a regular practice.

Sonya gradually became aware that someone was watching her. She kept her eyes closed and used her other senses, heightened by the exercise. There was an earthy smell and a slight musk, but not like human musk. Different, but not strange to her. She could hear the breath of the other, a little raspy... no.. just reverberating, like a low rumble or purr. It had to be Garrus. She tried to hide her smile. She opened her eyes and turned on her heels toward her surprised friend and ran across the floor to attack. She wanted to test his skills.

Garrus reflexively took a defensive stance when Sonya became aware of him and turned on him. This was going to be fun. He blocked her first attack, but not the second. She was quick. He landed a blow to her lower ribs. She winced then smiled.

"Are you sure a sparing match is a good idea, Shepard?" He asked, almost teasing. "I don't want to hurt you." He grinned when she narrowed her eyes at him.

"Let's have a go, for old times sake." She jabbed her fingers into the soft spot between the plates over his stomach.

Garrus grunted when the air was pushed out of him. She knew his weak spots.

"That wasn't _fair_, Commander..." He said sarcastically.

"_I know_!" She laughed and took a few steps back, inviting him into 'the ring'. Taunting him.

Garrus eyed her for a moment. Her form was perfect, text book. He could exploit text book. He made the first move. Not one he thought she would expect. She countered, throwing him to the ground. Something _he_ did not expect. She was stronger than she looked, and she cheated. He quickly recovered, sweeping a leg out to knock hers out from under her. She jumped over his leg and landed a blow with her heel to his hip. He grunted with the pain. She was playing rough.

"Ok, Shepard. If that's how you want to play it." He growled and changed tactics.

If she was playing dirty, he could too. He switched styles from the martial art to grappling. He tackled her, knocking her to the ground and quickly using the spines on his caves to lock her legs under him and folding her arms behind her back so that her own body weight held her to the floor. His face was inches from hers. He could smell her sent, strong and sweet in his nostrils. He resisted the urge to bite her.

She struggled and cried out with the pain in her shoulders. They were both panting. In this position her pelvis was pushing hard against his. It limited her movement helped keep her legs locked. She struggled against the pain to loosen herself to no avail. He tightened his grip. He had her pinned.

"Ok. you win." She relaxed her muscles to ease the pain in her shoulders and back. "I surrender." She relented.

Garrus was baring his teeth in a predatory grimace. Hearing her cry out beneath him and sent electricity running up his spine. When she'd said 'I surrender', he felt a tingling in a different part of his body. He felt the folds that concealed his maleness moisten as his arousal began poking through. He was suddenly very aware of the proximity of her hips to his. He quickly released her and took a few steps back.

"Uh, good match, Shepard." He couldn't look directly at her. "I thought I was coming down here for the Kodiak. I guess I was wrong." He teased her to divert her attention as much as his own. Her cheeks were flush from the brief battle. It made her look more feminine. More vulnerable. It wasn't helping him with his... problem.

"When did you learn to do that, Commander?" he asked gesturing toward her and nodding.

Shepard shift her weight to one leg and crossed her arms.

"Why? Are you offering me lessons?" She teased.

"I'm available most mornings, if you're interested." He teased. "Actually, I was wondering if I could join you if you're planning on making a habit of this... the practice I mean, not the sparing."

"I wasn't really. I was just easing some tension, but it's a good idea." She paused for a second, clasping her hands behind her back in military form. "We begin tomorrow morning at 0730 hours, understand soldier."

Garrus assumed the military posture, hoping it didn't leave anything exposed.

"Yes, Commander."

Shepard grinned at him before the elevator doors closed and she rode it up to her cabin. Garrus relaxed his posture and let out a breath he'd been holding. What was that? It took some effort to calm himself enough for his protuding head to receded back into him. His jaw ached. He'd forgotten about his injuries. He rubbed the sore mandible as he walked toward the shuttle. As he ran the diagnostics, his thoughts turned to the image of a tree on a small hill. Why would he be thinking about a tree? He wasn't particularly observant about individual plant life. One tree was the same as any other tree if he were in the position to be near them... possible cover from enemy fire. That was the extent of it. So why would he remember one that was out in the open. Clearly not a good cover area. He _remembered_ it. Where had he seen it? He couldn't recall. There was something else. Something... _protection_. But it was clear that tree would protect no one. It was too... _exposed_. He thought about Shepard and how she was still suffering her loss of Nihlus. The though made him feel even more guilty about his moment of carnal desire for her. He pushed the thoughts away once more. He needed to concentrate on his job.

Shepard washed the sweat from her body and hair. The water stung in a few minor scratches from the sparing match with Garrus. She hadn't even realized he'd wounded her. She admired the marks for a while, remembering when she'd earned them many times before... with Nihlus. His had been of a different nature and for different reasons. She sighed heavily and let herself fall against the tiled wall of the shower room. She closed her eyes, absently rubbing her forehead with the palm of her hand, then her neck where his teeth had once marked her as his own. Tears threatened to well in her eyes, but she blinked them back. She didn't have time for this. The Normandy would be waiting for her in a few moments. She didn't intend to keep the old girl waiting.


	9. Snow and Betrayal

Shepard went down to the hanger for the second time that day. This time we was in her armored enviro suit to brave the cold on the planet below and place a monument to the men and women that didn't make it off the Normandy before she had been destroyed. It wasn't really a crash sight. It was a debris field. The Normandy had died in space.

Garrus stood by the shuttle doors.

"I can do this with out you holding my hand, Gare." She said.

"I know. I'm not going to stop you from doing that. I am going down to the surface with you. I'm the co-pilot on this mission." He told her. His arms were crossed. He wasn't going to back down. He already had an arsenal of reasons why she should accept his coming. He'd 'convinced' the regular co-pilot into letting him do the job.

"Alright, but you're staying in the Kodiak. I'll be fine, I don't need a babysitter." She narrowed her eyes at him.

Garrus nodded and they climbed in the shuttle. Seeing the blue haze of the planet below brought the memories flooding back for both of them. His were the color of loss, anger and frustration. Her's were of pain and light and finally the darkness of death. Something tickled at the back of her thoughts. Something she knew she needed to remember. She grabbed at her chest. She needed to find them. She needed a piece of him back.

It was snowing. She hated snow. Snow was cold. She abhorred cold. Every piece of wreckage brought back memories. She found the old cockpit, the distress beacon, some of Pressly's journal entries. She was amazed those had survived. He had written about his feelings on the alien members of the crew. In the end he came to respect them. It was good to know. She found the old galaxy map ramp and console table. Something glinted in the snow by the mako, perched as if set there in testament on a large icy cluster of rock. She picked up the shiny metal object. It was an ID tag of a crewmen. She found several more as she tramped through the snow, but not hers. She found the panel that Alenko used to obsess over and the wall marred with scorch marks. She let her hand trace the darkend outline of one smokey shadow. She wanted to let the tears fall and join the frozen ground, but she had none left to shed.

She decided to place the monument in front of the hull that bore the ships name. She had to admit it was an inspiring sight. She wasn't ready to leave though. She had all twenty of the missing ID tags, but not the one's she wanted. There was a small ledge she hadn't examined yet.

Upon approaching it she thought she saw something smooth and round, not a natural formation. She quickly scaled the slope to investigate. It was her old N7 helmet. She picked it up, nostalgic, but a bit disappointed. She tucked it under her arm, looking down at the imprint it left in the snow. Something was poking out of the snow. It looked like a chunk of ice. She would have left it and walked away, thinking nothing more of it, but she bent to pick it up instead. She brushed away some of the dusty snow. It was more ID tags. She tentatively pulled them out of the snow. She didn't want to get her hopes up and have them smashed. She turned them over in her palm to read the names. 'Shepard, Sonya'. Her heart rate increased. Her hand shook slightly as she turned the over the other tag. 'Kryik, Nihlus'. When she read the words she closed her fist over the tags. She wasn't going to loose them again. She returned to the ship and sat more confidently than she had upon arrival.

Garrus noticed a change in her step after that day. More confident than she had been recently, more like the old Shepard. Her hair was even blonde again. Her tone was less venomous when speaking to others. She didn't smile more, but she would smile for him. He could always make her smile, even if she didn't always laugh. They never talked about her break down over lunch again. It was a few days later when she surprised him with a visit to the forward batteries. It started him when the doors hissed open and she stood behind him.

"Shepard. Need me for something?"

"Have you got a minute?"

"Sure. I was just checking the weapons systems. You can never be too careful."

Shepard walked over to the railing and leaned against it.

"I thought I'd seen every weapon in the galaxy in our fight against Saren. Mercenary work showed me other wise." He continued as they kept eye contact. "And now Cerberus rebuilds the Normandy with a few upgrades to boot. I wish we'd joined up with them sooner."

"I'm pleased to see that you're getting along with the new crew."

"They're as friendly to me as people from a group like Cerberus can be. And they've got you vouching for them." He gestured to her. "I can't exactly doubt your judgment. Not after I got my own squad killed." He lowered his head with the guilt and shame he felt. It was his turn to unload.

"How did you end up fighting mercenaries on Omega?" She was genuinely interested in how he'd ended up there of all places.

"I trained to become a Spectre after the Normandy was destroyed," He clasped his talons behind his back, proud that he could tell her he'd finally done it. "but it didn't work out. Too much poloticing at the Citadel. Nobody was willing to take risks." He shook his head. "Omega was filled with criminals nobody else could touch and there was no red tape to slow me down. It was a perfect fit. People there needed someone to believe in. Someone to stand up to those thugs."

"That explains how you started. How'd you end up with a squad?" She was impressed and happy that he'd gone through with the training, despite what his father may have felt about it.

"Not too different from how you formed your squad to fight Saren, actually. You prove that you can get things done and people join up." He started pacing again. "Mercs who wanted to atone, Security consultants tired of playing by the rules. I gave them hope." He gestured with his arms out wide displaying himself. Proud of what he'd started. Then he lowered them and hung his head. "And now they're dead. Shows what _I_ know."

"Tell me about your squad." She wanted to know what kind of people he'd spent the last year with. Who they were. How they affected him.

"There were twelve of us, including me. Former military operatives, C-sec agents, the usual. Had a salarian explosives expert. Pretty sure he's spent time in the STG. My tech expert was a batarian, believe it or not. Not the _friendliest_ guy, but he could hack any system ever built."

"What did your merc squad do? It didn't sound like you were available for hire." She raised her brows with curiosity.

"You saw Omega... it was full of thugs kicking the helpless. I formed my team to kick back." He clinched his fists. "We weren't mercenaries. At least, no one was paying us." He started pacing. "We made money by taking down slavers, pirates or gangs that went too far. Every member of my team had lost someone to Omega's gangs. We weren't out to get rich. We were out to make those bastards think twice before murdering someone in the street."

"doesn't sound like you made a lot of friends."

"I got three separate mer bands to work together to take me down. My manager at C-sec would be impressed." He cocked his head. "It was simple. We'd hit their shipments, disrupt activities. Get under their skin. Make them angry. They'd come charging into our well prepared kill zone. Cross fire and snipers. Clean and surgical. They never stood a chance."

"How did those mercenary groups take down your team?" She asked softly. She knew it was going to be a touchy subject, but he lead her to the question. He _wanted _her to ask.

Garrus looked her in the eye for a second then shook shook his head, walking away. His postured showed his defeat.

"It was my own damn fault. One of my people betrayed me." He walked out into the hall. Shepard followed. He kept his back to her. "A turian named Sidonis." He shook his head again, his mandibles flexing. "He drew me away just before the mercs attacked my squad, then he disappeared. Everyone, except me, is dead because of him." He turned his upper body sharply toward her to look at her to show her he wasn't hiding from the blame. "Because I didn't see it coming."

"Are you sure that's what happened? Maybe they took him out first."

"No. I put out feelers. He booked passage and cleared his accounts. He sold me out and ran."

"Do you know where Sidonis is now?" She would gladly track down the betrayer for her friend.

"No. His trail vanishes after he leaves Omega, but I'll keep hunting." He turned to her completely then. "I lost my whole team except Sedoins. One day I'll find him... and correct that." He nodded to her in his certainty.

He looked at her looking at him. He could see her determination, her willingness to help him. It reminded him of when she'd helped him take out Dr. Saleon. Now he needed her help again. What kind of turian was he? What kind of _man_ was he, that he had to ask for the help of a human woman to take down his enemies? It didn't matter that Shepard had proven herself to be more than most. He needed the help. He was not strong enough on his own. How could he protect her from _anything_ when he couldn't handle his _own _problems? He shook his head and walked past her without looking at her. He could smell the sweet sent of her skin when he did. How could he consider himself worthy to be with her... He violently pushed the thoughts and feelings away with the rage and contempt he felt for himself.

"Thanks for coming by, Shepard. I've got some things to take care of."

Sonya could tell he was in pain, but she knew better than to press an angry tuian. She let him go.


	10. Horizon

The Illusive Man was sending them to Horizon. The colony had gone dark. The hope was that they would catch the Collectors in the act and stop them. Shepard crossed her fingers, hoping Dr. Solus' defense against the seekers would actually work. She was taking him with her in case it didn't. Garrus was coming too. She hardly went anywhere without him. They began each day in the hanger at 0730 hours for 'turian chi', met up for lunch if they weren't on a mission and she took him with her if there was. He'd become her anchor and she was his.

The guns protecting the colony were finally on line and firing at the Collector ship. Shepard ducked into cover. Her armor was stained with the internal fluid of husks and Collectors and other abominations. They had evolved. She wasn't surprised. It had been two years after all, but they still died when she shot them. She'd picked up a Collector particle beam. She found it a bit over confident on the Collector's part that they did not have protection against their own weapons. Her current problem was some kind of bug with husks in it's mouth. It was huge and could fly and shot blue electric beams from it's eyes. A freaking nightmare. It seemed very intent on killing just her.

"Garrus," She shouted into the com. "Get this thing offa me! My shields are damaged, and I can't get a clear shot!"

"I'm on it!" came the reply.

Several rounds pelted the creatures flank followed by a concussive shot. It did little damage, but it gained the desired outcome. The giant turned away from Shepard's position long enough for her to drain the remaining energy reserves of the alien weapon into the assailant. It didn't explode, the way she thought it might. It just sort of fizzled out of existence.

"All clear. Target has been eliminated." She said into the com.

She left cover and walked over to where Garrus and Dr. Solus stood watching the Collector ship leave. The colonist they'd found hiding in a bunker ran past them.

"No! Don't let them get away!" He was shouting.

Shepard just looked at the man. She'd managed to save half the colony. Half was better than none.

"There's nothing we can do." She said. She was trying to be sympathetic, but she felt unappreciated for the ones she _did_ save.

"Half the colony's in there! They took Ian, and Sam and... and Lilith! Do something!" The man was pacing in frustration.

"I didn't want it to end this way... I did what I could."

"If it wasn't for Shepard, you'd_ all _be on board that ship." Garrus defended her.

"Shepard... wait. I know that name. Sure, I remember you. You some type of big Alliance hero."

A familiar voice came from behind a crate.

"Commander Shepard, Captain of the Normandy. The first human Spectre. Savior of the Citadel." Kaiden Alenko took a military stance in front of her and looked at the colonist. "You're in the presence of a legend, De Lan, and a ghost."

Kaiden looked back at Shepard. She was alive and she was standing in front of him. He'd come a long way since they last worked together. He was decorated. Experienced. Matured. Perhaps now she would have him. Perhaps now she would love him back...

"All the good people we lost and you get left behind. Figures. I'm done with you Alliance types." De Lan walked away.

Alenko took a few steps toward her. She thought he was going to try to hug her, again. He narrowed his eyes then offered her his hand.

"I thought you were dead, Commander. We all did." He shook her hand. He wanted to hug her. To tell her how glad he was she was alive, but she still had that look in her eye and he didn't need his junk kicked, again. He was a little angry. She was _alive_. Where had she_ been_ for the last _two years_?

"It's been a long time, Alenko. How've you been?" She didn't know what else to say. Alanko used to be a pansy. Something had changed in him. He seemed... different.

"That's all you have to say? You show up after two years and just act like nothing happened." He wasn't happy.

Shepard was taken back a bit. _That_ was new... a _back bone_.

"I would have followed you _anywhere_, Commander!" He leaned into her face. He saw her pupils condense to points of black and backed off. "Thinking you were gone..." He hung his head for a moment, then looked her in the eye. "It was looking a limb." She didn't seem to have a reaction to what he'd just said. He grew angry again. "Why didn't you try to contact me? Why didn't you let me know you were _alive_?"

Shepard cocked an eye brow. Clearly Alenko never got over his crush on her.

"Alenko, I was dead! Cerberus rebuilt me. That's why I'm alive." She saw his face loose color when she mentioned Cerberus.

"Alliance intel thought Cerberus might be behind the missing human colonies." Alenko said.. "And that you were working with them."

"So, you already knew." Garrus chimed in.

"Any you too, Garrus?" Alenko shook his head. Garrus held his ground.

"Cerberus and I both want to save the human colonies. That doesn't mean I answer to them." She shook her head.

"Do you really believe that? Or is that just what Cerberus wants you to think." Kaiden stepped closer to her. He wanted to smell her sweat, feel her breath on his skin. To smack her for working with Cerberus and being such a bitch to him. "I wanted to believe the rumors that you were alive, but I never expected anything like this. You've turned your back on _everything_ we stood for."

" Kaiden, you know I would only do this for the right reason. You saw it yourself. The Collectors are targeting human colonies and they're working with the Reapers."

Hearing her say his first name caught him off guard.

"I want to believe you, Shepard, but I don't trust Cerberus. They could be using the threat of the Reapers to manipulate you. What if they're behind it? What if they're working with the Collectors?"

"Damn it, Alenko." Garrus raised his voice and made a fist. "You're so focused on _Cerberus_ that you're _ignoring_ the _real threat_?"

"You're letting the way you feel about their history get in the way of the facts." Shepard agreed with Garrus.

"Maybe." Kaiden studied her face. She didn't like him when he was the nice guy. At least she seemed to respect him when he was blunt with her. "Or maybe _you_ feel like you owe Cerberus because they saved you. Maybe _you're_ the one who's not thinking strait." He seethed at her. She wasn't the woman she'd once been to him. "You've changed, but I still know where my loyalties lie. I'm an Alliance soldier. Always will be. I've got to report back to the Citadel. Let them decide if they believe your story or not." He turned to leave.

"I've already told the Council, Kaiden. They know everything. I can tell you how that conversation will end."

"A leopard can't change it's spots. Cerberus can't be trusted." Kaiden stopped to regard the Commander for a moment. She was still beautiful. He would go on missing her as if she had died. "Good bye, Shepard. Be careful." He added the last as an after thought. He was lieing to himself to say he didn't sill care, but it could never be... not now.

"Joker... get the shuttle ready. I've had enough of this colony." She watched Alenko walk away. He had changed as well. She wondered if things would have been different if he'd been more like this on the old Normandy. She knew he was wrong about Cerberus, maybe. It didn't matter. She would stop whoever was taking the colonists. She faced her team.

"Looks like you're counter measure worked, Dr. Solus." She nodded to the salarian.

"Yes. Was mostly confident in it's success. Glad to see we survived." He smiled.

"Yeah, so are we, Doc." Garrus said in his sarcastic humor sort of way. He wanted to go pound the crap out of Alenko, but that would hurt their cause in front of the Council.

Shepard shook her head. She stood with her arms crossed. She was pissed at Alenko. What right did the bastard have to talk to her like that?

On board the Normandy Shepard and the Illusive Man had a little chat. She was liking him less and less. He was trying to nose into her personal affairs. She pretty much told him to fuck himself. He responded just as harshly, but more politely. When she left she went strait to the galaxy map and punched in her next destination, then to her quarters. She was too angry to talk to anyone right then.

She lay on her bed watching the light filtered through the water of the fish tanks dance on the walls and ceiling. . The data pads of dossiers were scattered on the sheets beside her. She was playing with the tags between her fingers thinking about Nihlus. Trying to remember what happened after she died. She absently rubbed her forehead with her fingers. She looked at the scar on the tip of the one. It reminded her of a similar shape in the design of Nihlus' face paint. The pain was easing. She no longer cried herself to sleep every night. Sometimes she dreamed of him, always in the same place. There were grassy rolling hills and blue skies. Wisps of clouds floated over head. Some times she would dream they were hunting, or practicing their combat skills with each other. Other times they would be gardening or lieing with each other under the trees in their orchard. The more intense dreams were colored with intimate passion. She woke from these dreams wet with perspiration and in need of dry sheets. Her dreams of him were the most vivid she'd ever had. More like memories...


	11. The Ebbing Tide

The number of aliens aboard the ship grew. Garrus no longer felt like such an outsider. There was a tank bred krogan in one of the cargo holds. That seemed like a bad idea, but it wouldn't hurt to have him on their side. Shepard had't opened the can yet, but he was sure she would if that wasn't what she was doing right now. There was an asari. Much older than Liara had been. More experienced and... mature. Garrus has some difficulty ignoring the large breasts the blue alien let hang out. She made it clear she was past that point in her life, but would stand idle and caress herself when waiting for Shepard to talk to contacts on missions or buy upgraded equipment. It was bizarre. Tali was back on board. It was good to see another familiar face in a somewhat familiar place. It was still the Normandy. The up dates were nice. She was similar enough to her predecessor to feel like home.

There was a new human as well. A psychotic female botic bunked in the lower decks of engineering. She was bald with tattoos all over her exposed body. Garrus found nothing physically attractive about the half nude woman. But he admired her determination to survive and was impressed by her abilities. He was interested in how Shepard would manage her.

The next target recruit was a drell assassin. He hadn't seen many drell. They tended to keep to themselves and mostly stayed on Kahje. This would be interesting...

Garrus was in the middle of some calibrations when he heard gun shots from below. He grabbed his pistol and headed for the elevator. His first guess was Shepard had opened the tank and things didn't go as planned. His second was that something had exploded. But he knew Shepard. She could never leave a box un-opened if she thought she could use what was inside. When he got to the engineering deck he could see the krogan through the windows. He was out of the tank and had a trail of blood across the plates on his head. Garrus picked up his pace. He nearly ran over Shepard when she came out of the cargo hold doors.

"Garrus!" She threw her hands up in defense from the impending impact. She'd just been slammed against some crates by 'the perfect krogan'. She didn't need trampled by a turian on top of it.

"Shepard!" He stopped about three inches short of stampeding over her. "I heard gun fire." He looked toward the cargo hold where the krogan stood.

"I'm fine. He knows who's in charge. He's on our side. Besides, we can always vent the hold if he get's out of hand." She grinned up at him. She'd told the same thing to Miranda when she first brought the tank on board. She hadn't appreciated the humor.

"Ok, Shepard. I hope you know what you're doing." He could feel his heart beat hard in his chest. The last time he was this close to her was when he had her pinned down at the end of their first sparing match. He'd been careful not to repeat that since.

Shepard found herself looking into his eyes. They weren't Nihlus' eyes, but they had their own charm.

"I should get back to my duties." She said softly.

Garrus simply nodded and stepped aside. He kept his eyes to the ground until he heard the elevator's motors take her up to the Command Deck. He was falling in love with her. He knew that now. He'd tried to fight it. To push it away, but that wasn't stopping it from happening. He touched his scars with his free hand. Would she have him? Was she ready to move on from her grief of Nihlus? Did she even feel that way about him? They had been friends for so long. He didn't want to mess that up by complicating things. He waited in the hall a few more seconds before calling the elevator to go back to the forward batteries. He would have to find another way of dealing with these emotions.

Vakarian was impressed with the drell. He'd never seen anyone kill like that. The assassin did seem to have a bit of an attitude problem, chewing Shepard out the way he did. It had angered him for someone to disrespect her that way, especially after Alenko, but they needed all the help the could get to take down the Collectors.

Shepard was intrigued by Thane Krios. She spent more time with him as the weeks pasted between missions than she did with any other crew member when she made her 'morale rounds'. They grew close as friends. She learned he had also suffered great loss and it was a bonding element for them. She tried to encourage him to get out of Life Support now and then and meet other members of the crew, but he seemed uninterested... and a little disappointed. She wasn't sure why. When she tried to talk with Garrus he was always busy. She understood, of course . He was working on upgrading the Normandy's armaments. They'd finally gathered enough recourses for several projects.

Shepard checked her messages. She'd received a message from Alenko. She deleted it without reading it. She didn't care about anything he had to say. There was another from Krios.

Commander,

I need to speak with you.

Krios.

She went to see him immediately.

She understood his story, maybe better than most. He had wanted to protect them, provide for them. He only knew one way to do that and it had killed his wife and estranged him from his son. Now Kolyat was on the Citadel preparing to follow in his fathers foot steps, minus the training. It wasn't a good situation. She agreed to head back to the Citadel, then went to talk to Garrus. He'd been stewing for a while and she was tired of him shrugging her off.

She'd been all over the galaxy helping her crew tie up their loose ends before their probable death. She helped a krogan into adult hood, blew up an abandoned Cerberus facility, took out an Ardat Yakshi, 'rescued' on of Dr. Solus' former students from Krogans trying to find a cure for the genophage, exonerated Tali of treason,... denied the merc his revenge in order to save the lives of the refinery employees... the list went on. She was drawing the line after she helped Krios.

Garrus heard the doors open. He knew it was her. He always knew when it was Sonya. He spun around to face her.

"Shepard, I'm glad you came by. I've got something. I may need your help. Do you remember Sidonis... the one who betrayed my team? I found a lead on him." He walked passed her, snagging her hand as he went by and leading her to the hall. It wasn't even a thought just a reaction. He released her a few feet from the door and stood in front of her. "There's a specialist on the Citadel, name's 'Fade'. He's an expert on helping people disappear. Sidonis was seen with him." He spoke in earnest.

"Where do we find fade?" Sonya asked. Now she knew why he'd been upset lately. She had no problem taking down Sidonis.

"I've arranged a meeting in a ware house near the neon markets on Zakara ward." He made eye contact with her briefly. He saw the steel in her eyes and knew she was there for him. "Thanks Shepard." He flashed a grin. "I appreciate you taking the time to help me." He nodded and went back to work. He was too concerned with his thoughts of Sidonis. He didn't want to risk his anger spilling into his conversations with Sonya.

"Well," She thought to herself, "Citadel, here we come. Two birds with one stone... so to speak."

One interrogation, her first ever, and a punch to the face of a bitter, would be murderer, drell and Shepard was off to assist in an assassination instead of preventing one. After questioning the weak willed volis in the warehouse Shepard was debating whether what Garrus was doing was the right thing to they got out of the taxi on the Shipping floor, 'Fade' happened to be standing outside the doors, with Blue Suns mercs.

"Shepard?" Fade saw her first. "Garrus!" He turned and ran when he saw the turian.

"You can run, Harkin, but I'll find you!" Shouted Garrus.

They ducked into cover to take out the mercs. Shepard was surprised the drunk bastard had remembered her. Guess he'd been serious about that conversation on his lap he'd wanted to have.

Fighting through mercs and mechs was hard work. Fortunately the cargo bay offered lots of cover. Unfortunately that was also true for the Blues Suns mercenaries protecting "Fade". The human had helped Sidonis drop of the radar. Garrus was going to make him tell him where the traitor was.

Garrus leaned out of cover long enough to fire a round into the face of a Blue Sun. The mercs head exploded onto the crate behind him in a spatter of gore. Garrus smiled to himself. He was finally going to get revenge on Sidonis for his men. It didn't hurt that he was going to get to beat the crap out of Harkin either. The ex C-sec officer had alway been a piece of shit anyway.

Shepard provided cover fire for Thane to move to an advanced position. Garrus followed suit. He shot a brief glance at Shepard as he past her to a new position. She was subtly trying to change his mind, or at least get him to talk to Sidonis. He didn't give a damn why the bastard had done it. He just wanted the traitor dead. Shepard had a soft spot he didn't understand. He hated and loved her for it. He was also confused by it. She'd done everything but take the shot herself when they tracked down Dr. Saleon. Why was she hesitating now?

"Do you really think you can take me down, Garrus!" Harkin shouted over the inter com.

Garrus' mandibles twitched as two well armed heavy mechs dropped down from the conveyers over head.

"Harkin's going to regret this." He mumbled mostly to himself.

"Take Cover!" He shouted to Shepard and Thane as he ducked behind a large metal container. He hoped it was full of something heavy and missile proof. He was learning to really hate missiles.

Shepard took a position on the highest platform with a clear shot and good cover. Thane had taken cover next to her. Apparently she had the best spot. She switched weapons to the Collector laser rifle she'd picked up on Horizon. Those mechs were going to be vapor.

Garrus shot off several rounds. Gun fire from Thane's rifle echoed in the wake of the turban's shots. Shepard leaned out of cover lining up her shot. She found her mark and pulled the trigger. The kick was more than she'd expected. It had not been fully charged when she'd used it on laser missed her target.

"Damn," she cursed herself.

Shepard aimed again and pulled the trigger. One of the mechs fell to it's knees and exploded causing critical damage to the other mech. She wasn't sure if it was her shot or not that had taken it out. It didn't really matter as long as they 'died'. She leaned out of cover and fired. She missed the head but hit the target. The mech crumpled and exploded after a few more rounds from Garrus' rifle.

Garrus didn't saw a word or even look at her as he ran toward Harkin, hiding in the control tower.

Shepard was concerned about her betrayal and loss of his team had hurt him as much as angered him. It worried her to see him like this.

Shepard took down a few LOKI mechs that were waiting at the top of the platforms that staired up to the control room entrance. This was it. Garrus had gone up the other side to block Harkin's escape.

The doors hissed open. Shepard and Thane moved in, weapons ready. A faint blue biotic glow danced on Shepard's skin. Harkin was taping glowing keys on his console looking out the window to find them. He saw Shepard out of the corner of his eye and darted the opposite way, looking over his shoulder at the pointed gun.

"You we close, but not close enough!" Garrus surprised Harkin landing a blow to the human's face with the butt of his rifle. While Harkin cradled his newly broken nose Garrus wrapped an arm over his chest and slammed him into the nearest wall grabbing his shirt collar.

"So, 'Fade', couldn't make yourself disappear, huh?" He was so close to getting Sidonis, the rage was welling in him like a flood.

"Common Garrus, we can work this out. Whaddya need?" Harkin said, smooth as ever. Garrus released his grip and took a few steps away from the man's rancid alcohol breath. He turned his back to him.

"I'm looking for someone." Garrus spat.

"Well, I guess we both have something the other one wants." Harkin taunted. That was a bad idea. Garrus turned on the human. Harkin raised his hands in defense shaking his head. Garrus kneed him in the groin, hard. Harkin fell to the floor groaning in pain.

"That must have hurt." Shepard fained sympathy. She crossed her arms. "We're not here to ask favors, Harkin." She snapped at him.

Harkin stood up again. "You don't say... princess." Harkin smiled when he saw the Shepard's scowl. That's what he'd called her on the Citadel when she came to him looking for Garrus, who was now beating the piss out of him.

"You helped a friend of mine disappear. I need to find him." Garrus' face was hard.

Shepard had never seen him quite this angry before. I made her a little afraid of him herself.

"I might need... a little more information than that." Harkin huffed as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"His name was Sidonis, Turian, came from the..."

"I know who he is..." Harkin cut him off and leaned into Garrus' face, " and I'm not tellin' you squat."

"Just tell us what we want to know." Shepard told him. She leaned on her back leg.

"I don't give out client information, it's bad for business." Harkin shook his head.

Garrus was reaching the limit of his patience. He brought his knee up so hard into Harkin rib cage that it lifted the man off the ground. Garrus let him fall to the floor and firmly placed his armored boot on Harkin's face.

"You know what else is bad for business? A broken neck!" He sneered, gradually applying more pressure on Harkin's neck. Harkin started gasping for air and clawing at Garrus' foot.

"Alright, alright! Get off me!" Harkin gurgled.

Garrus felt something tap his shoulder. He turned his hear sharply over his shoulder. It was Sonya. She shook her head at him. He knew she was right and eased off.

"Terminus really changed you, hu, Garrus." Harkin hissed.

"No, but Sidonis... opened my eyes. Now arrange a meeting." Garrus demanded, pointing to the console to his right with a sideways nod. Harkin looked at the terminal and back at Garrus. He nodded again and gave Harkin a rough nudge.

"I'm going! I'm going." Harkin walked over and activated the contact sequence for Sidonis. "Yeah, it's me. Listen, there's a chance you're identity may be compromised."

Garrus took out his gun and turned off the safety. He examined it thoughtfully in his grip. He saw the dieing faces of the last survives of team. He saw the lifeless bodies of the one that hadn't survived the attack. Sidonis was going to pay.

"That's why I'm calling. I'm sending an agent. Where do you want to meet?" Harkin said in th back ground.

Garrus replaced the weapon with a click.

"All right, they'll be there. Don't worry, I got it covered!" Harkin cut the link and turned back to Garrus. The vigilante faced the forger waiting for the low life to give him the info.

"It's all good. He wants to meet in front of the Orbital Lounge, middle of the day. Sooo, if our business is done I'll be going..." Harken squinted his bruising eye and turned to leave. Garrus caught him by the arm.

"I don't think so. You're a criminal now, Harkin." Garrus was hardly an inch from him face.

"So what... You're just going to _kill_ me? That's not your_ style_, Garrus."

"Kill you? No. But I don't mind slowing you down a bit." He took out his pistol as he released Harkin's arm to take aim at his leg. The round went into the ceiling instead of Harkin. Shepard had disrupted his shot by forcing his aim to the ceiling.

"You don't need to shoot him. He won't be able to hide form C-sec now." Shepard spoke softly, but firm to her turian friend.

Garrus glared at her in his moment of hate. He hadn't meant to. That emotion was not for her. He shook her off his arm with a growl of frustration. Why did she care about one worthless life?

"I guess it's your _lucky day_." he said with a low rumble in his chest.

"Yeah, I hope we can do this again_ real_ soon." Harkin said sarcastically as he wiped the sweat and blood from his face with the back of his hand.

Shepard turned to walk away. Garrus watched her over his shoulder until she was to far away to stop him again. He looked back at Harkin. Garrus drew himself up and brought his plated forehead down on Harkin's already broken nose almost as hard as he could. Harkin reeled in pain, grabbing his nose again and fell to the floor unconscious. Garrus nodded in satisfaction then followed after Shepard.

"I didn't _shoot_ him." He said with defensive humor. The tone in his voice was darker than his usual banter.

"Common, let's move." Shepard said in a low tone. She was disappointed and exasperated. It wasn't like the Garrus she knew to behave this way. Maybe he'd changed more that she thought.

"Sidonis better be there, or I'm coming back to finish the job." He shouted over his shoulder to the unconscious Harkin. He was almost hopeful that he would get the chance. Harkin always was a pain in the ass.

The trio made their way to the transportation hub and took a cab to the Orbital Lounge. Garrus disable the auto pilot and drove manually to a balcony near the catwalks. They had ridden in an uncomfortable silence. Finally Garrus broke the quiet.

"Harkin's a bloody menace. We shouldn't have just let him go. He deserved to be punished." He didn't look at her. He was still up set that she'd stopped him from shooting Harkin. It wasn't like he was going to kill him.

"I'm getting a little worried about you, Garrus. We were pretty hard on Harkin."

"You don't think he deserved it?" He looked at her now. He could tell she was displeased with him. Seeing her softened him a little. She turned away from his gaze. His mandibles twitched.

"It's just not like you."

Garrus paused for a moment then looked out his side view window, "What do you want from me, Shepard?" He twinged inside his hard suite after the words left his mouth. He realized the answer he wanted was that she wanted _him_. Given the circumstances, that would not be the answer she would give, even if it were true.

"What would _you_ do if someone betrayed _you_?" He glared at her, more angry with himself than with her. She sat calmly, seemingly unaffected by his glowering.

Thane sat silently in the back seat. He wasn't about to get involved, but he was curious. He wondered if the two had recognized their feelings for each other yet. It was certainly apparent to him. Garrus especially. The turian usually referred to actions to be taken on by either himself or her as 'we', unless they were arguing...

Thane had begun to care for Shepard himself, but he would not pursue another mans mate.

"Perhaps in another life." He thought to himself. He let the feelings ebb away.

Shepard considered her words for a while. She thought about Alenko. It wasn't exactly a betrayal, but she did feel like he'd turned his back on her.

"I'm not sure," She finally said. "but I wouldn't let it change me."

Garrus looked at her again, pointedly.

"I would have said the same thing before it happened to me."

Shepard meet his gaze then. He was still angry with her, but not nearly as angry as he was with Sidonis.

"It's not too late. You don't have to go through with this." She said softly.

"Who's going to bring Sidonis to justice if _I _don't. Nobody else _knows_ what he's done. Nobody else _cares_." he spat. He knew he was wrong. _Sonya_ knew and she cared. If she didn't she wouldn't be sitting next to him having this conversation. He was too vexed to admit that, though. "I don't see any other options." He shook his head while looking out the windshield of the taxi.

"Give me a chance, let me talk to him." Sonya almost pleaded with him.

"Talk all you want, it's not going to change my mind. I don't care what his _reasons_ were, he screwed us! He _deserves_ to _die_." Garrus was tired of arguing about it. He leaned back into the seat.

"I understand what you're going through, but do you really want to kill him?" She asked.

"I appreciate your concern, but I'm not you."

"This isn't you either, Garrus." She spoke softly.

"_Really_. I've always hated injustice. The thought that Sidonis could get away with this... Why should he go on living while ten good men lie in unmarked graves? I'm sorry, Shepard. Words aren't going to solve this."

"Alright, I won't mention it again." She relented.

"I appreciate that." It was a bluff and he knew it. But she had given up for now and he was grateful for the end of the discussion. "I need to set up." He looked around the catwalks for a good position. "I can get a clear shot from over there." He pointed to a catwalk over a archway. It was heavily shadowed by an over hanging bulk head.

"You just want me to get him into position?"

"Basically. Keep him talking for a minute. When I've got him in my sights I'll let you know."

He programmed the auto pilot to take the down and land. "Give me a signal so I know you're ready and I'll take the shot. You better go. He'll be here soon." He pointed with his chin to the ward below, then exited the taxi. He looked after it, watching it float way. Doubt seeped into his mind for the first time. He walked over to the catwalk and knelt down. He'd pulled out the rifle and released the safety. The sights and extended barrels hissed and clicked into place. One round. He would only need one. He touched the com in his visor,

"Shepard, can you hear me?"

"Loud and clear."

He positioned his sniper rifle and practiced zooming in on random targets. He found Shepard and followed her for a moment. Thane was close behind her. Garrus scanned the crowed again and found his target on a bench on the opposite side.

"Alright... There he is. Wave him over and keep him talking." He instructed her in a low tone over the com.

Shepard did as she was asked. Sidonis saw her and cautiously approached. He was wearing expensive looking civies, blue with red down the front and gold detailing.

"He must have been paid very well for his betrayal." Shepard thought. No doubt Garrus was thinking something similar.

Sidonis walked over to Shepard stopping only a meter away, shifting his weight to the front leg and leaning toward her slightly.

"Let's get this over with." He said. He was tired of having to deal with this crap. Harkin had said it was done, and now there was a problem. He was going to have to have a little chat with the human.

Garrus lined up the shot. Sonya was still standing in front of his target.

"You're in my shot. Move to the side." Garrus said hastily.

Shepard's heart skipped a beat to hear him talk to her like that. She became very aware of just how dangerous Garrus actually was. She could move. It would be easy. Sidonis would be dead and Garrus would have his revenge, but this wasn't right. She hoped to spirits that Garrus was still the turian she thought he was and steeled herself for the shot she would never hear or feel if she was wrong.

Garrus zoomed in on the back of Sonya's head. When she moved, Sidonis' head would be dead center. She didn't move.

"What is she doing?" He thought. Then he heard her voice. She was talking to Sidonis.

"Listen, Sidonis. I'm here to help you." she said.

"Don't ever say that name aloud..." he whispered. Sidonis looked around in a near panic as if snipers would start shooting him from every darkend corner on the ward.

"I'm a friend of Garrus'. He wants you dead, but I'm hoping that's not necessary."

"Garrus? Is this some kind of joke?" Sidonis was angry now.

"Great," she thought, "now I've managed to piss of two turians today."

Garrus' voice came over the com,

"Damn it, Shepard! If he moves, I'm taking the shot!"

"You're not kidding are you?" Sidonis looked around to try and spot his old team mate."Screw this, I'm not sticking around here to find out. Tell Garrus I had my own problems..." He turned to leave. Shepard grabbed his arm,

"Don't move."

"Get off of me!" He shouted.

"I'm the only thing standing between you and a hole in the head."

Sidonis lowered his head, "Fuck." He looked at Shepard again. "Look, I didn't _wanna_ do it, I didn't have a choice."

"Everyone has a choice." Garrus growled. His rage was growing. His brow knitted together as he glowered at the back of Sonya's head through the scope.

"They got to me! Said they'd kill me if I didn't help, what was I supposed to do?" Sidonis tone sounded as defeated as he felt.

"Let me take the shot! He's a damn coward!" Garrus seethed over the com.

Shepard's military experience agreed with Vakarian. Part of her wanted to take the shot herself, not just for the people that had died because of him, but for what that betrayal had done to her friend. In a way, Sidonis had taken something from her as well.

"That's it? You were just trying to save yourself?" She had trouble hiding her own anger from her voice.

"I know what I did. I know they died because of me." His voice was low and discouraged.

Sidonis walked over to the railing staring down at the alien plant life that grew in the small median.

"I have to live with that. I wake up every night, sick and sweating. Each of there faces staring at me... accusing me." Sidonis closed his eyes for a moment, trying to push away the thoughts and feelings that haunted him.

As Sidonis spoke Garrus listened over the com. The soft spot in his heart, where he kept his feelings for Sonya, ached. She had an effect on him he did not anticipate. Her doubt tainting his resolve for revenge. Did Sidonis really struggle with his decision? Was knowing that Sidonis suffered every day enough for him to leave the turian alive... Was that really what he wanted?

"I'm already a dead man. I don't sleep, food has no taste. Somedays I just want it to be over."

Sidonis' own words tore Garrus from his uncertainties. He heard the plea and was eager to comply.

"Just give me the chance." Garrus growled over the com, hate coursing through his veins.

Shepard studied the turian's face. He was staring off into the distance lost in his grief and self loathing.

"Alright, if that's what you want." She spoke the words softly, apologetically. She would have wanted revenge as much as Garrus did. She knew that.

Shepard turned way and left him to Garrus. Behind her she heard Sidonis' body hit the rail as it fell to the floor. She looked up at Garrus. He was already walking to the pickup point.

When Sonya walked away from his target, his choler took over. He didn't even think about it when he pulled the trigger. He packed away the rifle and was walking to the pick up point before the body hit the floor. It was done. He wasn't sure how he felt about it, but it was done.

Thane followed Shepard to the taxi. He tried to read her face for reasons why she let Garrus kill his target. Did she feel that vengeance for betrayal was a good enough reason to kill? Why had she not judged Kolyat's target worthy of death? As a politician, Talid being anti-human was a valid reason for most humans to want him dead. Yet she had not allowed his death. Perhaps her focus had been on preventing his son form following a dark path. If so, she was more of a friend to him than he thought. The emotion he carried for her came, and he entertained them for a time and let them go. Like a wave rolls onto the beach, then slinks away.

The taxi landed on the balcony again. Garrus watched Sonya get out and walk over to him. He was angry with her for delaying his right to vendace for his men. He was grateful that she had let him have it in the end. He wanted to punch her in the face and, simultaneously, take her in his arms. What was he going to do with her?

"I know you want to talk about this, but I don't. Not yet." He leaned toward her, aggressive but not hostile.

"I know it didn't go how you'd planed, but I think it's for the best." her voice was soothing.

"I'm no so sure." Garrus shook his head.

"Give it time."

"Yeah, maybe that'll be enough. I wanna know I did the right thing, for my men. They deserve to be avenged. When Sidonis was in my sights... I thought about not going through with it."

"The lines between good and evil blur when we're looking at people we lo.. know." She hoped he didn't catch on to what she almost said. She had trouble grasping it herself.

She was looking him in the eye. Her face was soft and concerned. There was a tender spot in her heart for him too, he could see it in her eyes. His anger at her dissolved. He relaxed a little inside his armor.

"Yeah, there was still good in him. I could see it, but he was a traitor and a coward. This was the only way." He paused looking at the floor for a moment before he found her face again. "It's so much easier to see the world in black and white. Grey, I don't know what to do with grey." he admitted.

"Follow your instincts."

"My instincts got me into this mess," he laughed.

"Don't be so hard on yourself." She playfully tapped each of his shoulders.

"Let's get outta here. I need to get away from this place."

"I'm with you."

Sonya followed Garrus to the taxi. Thane had waited patiently inside. He heard most of the conversation. He eyed her closely as she settled into her seat and the taxi lifted off. She seemed calm as she sat, resting hand in her lap. She and Garrus would exchange glances now and then. There was defiantly a bond between them that had developed over time. They trusted each other. Needed each other. As much as she had shared with him about her forbidden love with Nihlus, she had come to love Garrus just as much. It was different. Just as his feelings for her were different than how he felt about Irikah. But there was love there. Strong and binding. It wasn't his place, but he felt strongly that they should admit it to at least themselves before it was too late. He had lots of experience in matter of life on being too late.

Thane took a deep breath. It was difficult and uncomfortable. A reminder that his time was growing shorter every day. His thought turned to Kolyat... and to Irikah. He would see her again, soon. It was a warmer thought than focusing solely on his body's death.


	12. Reach and Flexibility

That night sleep came easy to the exhausted team. Sonya dreamt of Nihlus as she often did. They were walking by the sea hand in talons. She could feel them graze her bare thigh now and then. She missed that. Before she woke he kissed her and told her he loved her. But he said something else after she returned the sentiment. He told her that, if she found happiness in life, not to deny it for sake of the dead. It was a strange dream. One that confused her. She began to wonder if they were indeed dreams when she found the marks on her thigh in the shower the next morning.

Garrus dreams were similar, but not so romantic. They were similar in that he was near a beach. He could smell the water, feel the breeze, even taste the salt. The sound of the crashing waves echoed over the grassy fields where he was tackled and pinned down by a turian with a white face. The sent of grass replaced that of the water. His face was pushed into the dirt, his arms twisted behind him. The vulnerable skin of his neck exposed to attack. The assailant leaned close to his ears. Garrus could feel the hot breath on his hide.

"Protect her, even if it costs you your life." The voice growled. "Love her if you must, but she will always return to me."

The words were not unfamiliar. It was a traditional claim to rights of a mate that was being competed for. Garrus wasn't sure if it was his guilty conscious or if the fates had allowed Nihlus to challenge him in death. Either way, the pain felt real enough. The harder he struggled, the more he was sure something was going to break off.

"Her partner in Life, yours in the After... lest you release your claim!" Garrus added the last after he found foot hold enough in the ground to toss his attacker off of him. He didn't pounce on the recovering turian, but he did take an aggressive stance, talons ready to kill. Nihlus rose to his own stance, teeth bared. "Do you concede?" Garrus growled back.

Nihlus nodded and relaxed his posture.

"I do."

Garrus waited a few seconds before relaxing his own body.

"Then we are as brothers." Garrus offered his talons in an offering of peace and friendship.

Nihlus stepped toward him, taking his talons in his own, locking them together between their faces. Garrus woke, sore and still tired. Whatever doubts he had about the spirits, they were quickly diminishing.

Thane dreamt about Irikah. After that he sot Shepard no more. He offered her his thanks and his gun, but his heart was taken. He would see his wife again.

Shepard went to see Garrus the next day when he didn't meet her for lunch. They were headed toward the Hugo Gernsback crash in the Alpha Draconis system. It was to be the last stop before seeking the IFF on the derelict Reaper. The Illusive Man had talked with Shepard about some time ago, after sending them knowingly into a trap. She put it off as long as she could, mostly out of spite for the Illusive Man. As Sonya thought over the experience she realized how often Garrus had thrown himself in the way of a bullet for her, or sacrificed his own defense to provide her with cover fire. She grasped at the tags under her shirt. She would always love Nihlus. She still missed him... but she was still alive and she'd found herself caring for Garrus in ways she didn't care for anyone else. He was... precious to her.

The doors hissed open behind him. As always, he could smell the sweet musk that was unique to her. He turned around casually, grinning.

"Shepard. Need me for something?"

"Have you got a minute?" She asked and cocked her head slightly.

"Sure! Just killing time anyway... I wanted to thank you again for your help with Sidonis. Whatever happens with the Collectors or the Reapers or whoever else comes after us, I know you'll get the job done."

"You actually think we'll find something worse than Collectors or Reapers?" She raised an eye brow.

"I like to expect the worst," He shrugged. The pain in his shoulders made him wince. He hid it from her. She didn't seem to notice. "There's a small chance I'll be pleasantly surprised."

"I couldn't do this without you, Garrus." Shepard clasped her hands behind her back.

"Sure you could. Not as stylishly, of course" He paused as she crossed the room, grinning at him, to sit on the bench by the wall. "It's strange going into a suicide mission on a human ship. Your people don't prepare for high-risk missions the way turians do."

"I thought you'd be used to high-risk operations on human ships." She rested a hand on one knee and he elbow on the other. "I mean, think about tracking Saren to Ilos."

"Sure, but that was quick." He paced the small room a bit. "We raced out, landed, blew up some geth and saved the galaxy. This time we've got Miranda and Cerberus and that AI all telling us what we're up against. I think I preferred blind optimism." He shook his head.

"Honestly, Garrus. What do you think our chances are?" She was studying his face, how the red lights reflected of the metallic surface of his plates...

"Honestly?" He shrugged. "The Collectors killed you once and all it did was piss you off. I can't imagine they'll stop you this time."

His confidence in her surprised and flattered her.

"But," He continued to pace. "an unmapped area, advanced technology, and the Collectors? We'er going to loose people. No way around that." He stopped pacing to lower his head. "Not a happy analysis, I know. Don't worry. I won't spread it around." He shook his head. "And I'm with you regardless." He nodded.

"Do you ever regret leaving C-sec or the turian military?" She blinked.

"Not for a minute." He took a step toward her. "When it comes down to it, Shepard, I don't think I'm a very good turian." He looked away for a moment.

"What makes you say that?"She asked with one brow raised.

"When a good turian hears a bad order, he follows it. He might complain, but he knows his place. I just don't see the point in staying quiet and polite. Not when the galaxy's at stake."

"How do turians get ready for high-risk missions?" She was curious to see if it was anything she could apply to their current mission.

"With violence usually." He clasped his talons behind his back. "Turian vessels have more operational discipline than your Alliance, but fewer personal restrictions. Our commanders run us tight and they know we need to blow off steam. Turian ships have training rooms for exercise, combat-sims, even full-contact sparing... Whatever lets people work off stress. Not that we don't occasionally have a go at it in the hanger or refine our combat skills, Commander. I appreciate our morning routine."

"So you mean to tell me that turian ships have people fighting each other before a mission?" She tried not to smile at his comment.

"It's supervised, of course. No body's going to risk an injury that interferes with the mission. And it's a good way to settle grudges amicably. I remember one mission..." He started pacing again. "We were about to hit a batarian pirate quad. Very risky. This recon scout and I had been at each other's throats. Nerves mostly. She suggested we settle it in the ring." Garrus remembered the scout with some fondness. He still sometimes wondered what happened to her.

When Sonya herd him say 'she', she got a little uncomfortable, but curious.

"I assume you took her down gently." Shepard teased.

"Actually, she and I were the top-ranked hand-to-hand specialists on the ship. I had reach, but she had flexibility." Garrus casually made his way toward the door keeping his face from her. "It was brutal. After nine rounds the judge call it a draw. There were a lot of unhappy betters in the training room. We, uh, ended up holding a tie breaker in her quarters. I had reach, but, uh, she had flexibility." He laughed lightly and turned sharply to Sonya. "More than one way to work off stress, I guess." He said as casually as he could manage.

Sonya shook her head with amusement and grinned with one side of her mouth. Picturing Garrus in that situation carried with it the memories of what love with a turian had been like. She and Garrus were good friends. Maybe that was enough to consider...

"It sounds like you're carrying some tension." She stood up and took a few steps toward him. "Maybe I could help you get rid of it." It wasn't really a question.

Garrus spoke quicker than he'd meant to. Her forwardness surprised him.

"I didn't think you'd feel like sparing, Commander."

She grinned with half her mouth again and put herself between him and the console.

"What if we skipped right to the tie breaker?" She asked suggestively, and leaned against the console to face him. "We could test your reach... and my flexibility."

Garrus had taken a few respectful steps back.

"Oh, I didn't... hummm." He wasn't sure how to react to her sudden assertiveness in such a matter. "Never knew you had a weakness for men with scars." He struck a proud pose, teasing her with comical defense.

Sonya shook her head at him, smiling.

"Well," He turned away from her to think. If she was ready to move on and she _wanted_ to be with him... "Why the hell not.? There's no one in this galaxy I respect more than you," He turned his upper body so he could see her. "and if we can figure out a way to make it work then... Yeah. Defiantly."

Sonya left the console barely missed brushing his armor with her arm. She knew he'd be able to smell her pheromones. She offered up a flirty smile. She had a glint in her eye.

Brain destroying plant life, women as pets? The mission had more bad news than she could handle all at once and stay calm. She couldn't imagine how Taylor must be feeling. Shepard wanted to shoot the man for his crimes, but it was Taylor's father. She let them hash it out for a while. She would ask a question, they would argue about his response. In the end she left the decision up to Jacob. The Lieutenant was a good man. He let the criminal go to prison. Shepard was tempted to let Garrus release the hunters, that had found their way up to them, from gun point to have their way with the 'Captain'. But that was not the right thing to do. Instead they resecured Ronald Taylor in his 'palace'. It seemed that would be the best defense for him. They had to knock the hunters unconscious and drag them beyond the walls. Shepard gave Taylor a day or two before going to check on him.

"Commander." Jacob addressed Shepard when she leaned on the table behind him. "Can I help you with something?'

"We don't talk much, I thought you might want to after the last mission."

"I appreciate your concern, but I'm a big boy. I can handle it." Jacob crossed his arms.

"How about unofficially? We have to trust each other if there's a chance to survive this."

"Ok, Shepard. Yeah,it feels good to put a lid on the past. Move on... ya know?"

"Are you so hardened that you can't even acknowlage what you're father did?" She asked

"I never said it didn't affect me, I just don't carry it around. He shaped who I am, but I'm more than that." Jacob turned to Shepard. She was different that any woman he'd ever met. She got the job done. That's what he had liked about Miranda. But she was softer than he'd expected a Alliance Commander and a Spectre to be. She had a kindness. And she was beautiful. He always did like blondes. "You're a soldier, like me. You get that." He took a step toward her. She reflexively tried to back away, but the table blocked her exit. "I want you around more, Shepard. I think we share something that could be good for us."

"Taylor, if I've given you the wrong idea... I'm sorry." She skirted the corner, and put the table and it's array of guns, between them.

"I'm sorry, Commander. I thought that... Never mind. It won't happen again. Can I just ask," Jacob looked away. "Did you ever have any interest? I was picking up signals. Obviously I interpreted them wrong."

"Taylor, if this had come up a few weeks ago or even a few days ago I may have taken you up on your offer, but it wouldn't have been what you're asking for." Shepard looked him in the eye. "You would have been a toy, Jacob. I don't think that's what you want. You can ask the merchant on my last ship..."

"Ok, Shepard. I read you loud and clear. I'm still with you, for the mission I mean. I won't bring this up again." He clasped his hands behind his back and nodded.

"I need to get back to my duties." She nodded back.

Taylor saluted her and returned his attention to his console. Shepard left. She felt awkward about the whole thing, but what could she do? She took the stairs up to the cockpit to have a chat with Joker. He liked to complain about the AI. His antics were hilarious, though she never let on too much. It would be a welcome break from all the drama she was leaving in the armory.

"Hey Commander, it's good to see Garrus finally pulled that stick out of his ass. But now he's trying to beat people to death with it!" Joker said as he swiveled the chair around. He really enjoyed the new leather seats.

"He's not _that_ bad, Joker. You make it sound like he's krogan." She smiled.

"Yeah, well, after the one in the cargo hold smashed up one of the Normandy's windows I kinda have t'stick with my statement." He teased her.

Shepard gave Joker a look.

"Ok, ok... so he's not_ that_ bad... anymore. So what changed, Commander? You know somthin' I don't?" Joker looked at her, curious. There wasn't much he didn't know and, as much as he hated the ship cancer, EDI had extended his ability to monitor the going's on of the ship. Something he hadn't had on the old Normandy.

"Nothing you need to worry about, Joker. I'll see ya later."

"Alright, keep your secrets." Joker shot back playfully as he returned to his console.

Shepard smiled to herself and decided to check on the guns in the forward batteries.


	13. Comfortably Nervous

The doors hissed open behind him.

"Shepard. Need me for something?" He asked, paranoid that his every word might come off the wrong way now.

"Got a minute?" She tried to hide her grin.

Garrus glanced over both shoulders looking for the door controls. He found them and locked the doors shut behind her.

Sonya couldn't hold back her smirk.

"Yeah, I've been thinking abut what we talked about, blowing off steammm.. eeasing tention. I've never considered cross species intercourse... not seriously. And... _damn_, saying it that way dosn't help. Now i feel dirty and clinical."

Garrus shook his head, not looking at her. He took a few steps toward the wall. He was nervous.

"Aare we _crazy_ to even be _thinking_ about this? I'm not su... " His tone started to waver. He'd never been more afraid of a conversation. "Look, Shepard." He found the strength to look her in the eye. "I know you can find something a little closer to home."

He'd heard Jacob talk about Sonya on lunch with a few other crew men in a way that suggested his interest in her, and if she was just looking for a toy... like the merchant...

"I don't want something closer to home." Sonya said, taking a few steps toward him. "I want you. I want someone I can trust." She batted her lashes and grinned. She wasn't trying to be coy. It was her body responding to his proximity to her. Her cheeks felt slightly warm.

Trust was an issue for both of them after what they'd been through. There were few people that qualified as trust worthy, especially with a Cerberus crew.

"I can do that... I'll find some music and find something we can both drink... It'll either be a night to treasure or a whole interspecies awkwardness thing. In which case fighting the Collectors will be a welcome distraction. So, you know, a win either way."

Sonya put a hand on the armor around his muscles in his legs felt weak. He couldn't have escaped her touch if he wanted to.

"Garrus, if your not comfortable with this it's ok. I'm not trying to pressure you. And I do have some experience with turian anatomy." She absently glanced down to his pelvic region before locking her eyes on his. "I don't think it will be as bad as you think it will be." She offered a smile.

"Shep... Sonya, you're about the only friend I've got left in this screwed-up galaxy. I'm not gonna pretend I've got a fetish for humans, but this isn't about that. This is about us. You don't ever have to worry about making me uncomfortable. Nervous, yes, but never uncomfortable. I just want you to be sure this is what you want." He paused for a moment, looking into the soft brown of her eyes. "I'm not Nihlus, Sonya. I can't replace him." he shook his head.

Sonya let her hand slip off his shoulder and returned it to her side after reflexively touching the metal through her shirt. He was right. She needed to make sure she loved _him_, not the race, not the memory of Nihlus.

"I know. You wouldn't."

She looked away from him, remembering the times he had risked himself for her, when he'd run strait to her when the Normandy was being ripped apart, when he'd come to her defense against the Council and Alenko... when he'd almost died and how enraged and lonely she'd felt. The terror that had gripped her at the thought of loosing him. She found his eyes with hers.

"Garrus, when we were on Vermire, and Saren had me... at a disadvantage... Do you know who.. Did you fire that round at him?"

Garrus was surprised she remembered that. His mandibles flexed.

"I may have _accidently_ pulled the trigger while trying to regain my feet..." He couldn't bring himself to take direct credit for saving her life.

Sonya snaked her hand around to the back of his neck and gently urged his face toward hers. He didn't resist as she tenderly place a kiss on the edge of the scar on his mouth.

"I want to be with _you_, Garrus." She spoke softly.

Garrus could feel her breath on his skin. With her so close to him he picked up on new sents of her. Deeper flavors, a heavier musk and a tanginess made him want to taste her. He slowly, but firmly pulled away. His heart pounded in his chest.

"Ok, but I want to wait. To disrupt crew as little as possible before we share a calm before the storm. I want to try it with you. I want a few moments that are just for us before we throw ourselves into hell for the good of the galaxy."

Garrus could kick himself for bringing up their impending doom.

"I want that too, Garrus." Sonya replied.

She was gracious to forgive him his idiosyncrasies. He loved her for it.

"You know me," He shrugged. "I always like to saver the last shot before popping the heat sink."

Sonya smiled, waiting for him to realize what he'd said.

"Wait.. that metaphor just went some where _horrible_." He offered an awkward grin.

'Ill let you get back to work..." She laughed as she backed away.

"Right, 'cause I'm in a great place for optimizing firing algorithms right now."

He winked at her as she backed through the door way, pointing to his chest with one talon to indicate his raised heart rate.


	14. Inside the Corpse of a Reaper

The Normandy cautiously approached the dead Reaper floating over a brown dwarf. The ship shuddered. Joker was struggling to keep the Normandy steady. Shepard cling to the head rest of his chair.

"What's with all the chop, Joker?"

"I'm doing my best. The wind's gusting at 500 KPH!" He checked a blinking alert on the display panel. "There's another ship along side the Reaper. It's not transmitting any IFF but the radar reads it's silhouette as get."

"Guess we know why the science team stopped reporting in..." Shepard said. That's just what she needed. Geth.

The Normandy abruptly regained a steady flight. She wasn't ungrateful, but it was an change.

"What just happened?" She asked, studying the displays over Joker's shoulder.

"The Reapers' mass effect fields are still active. We just passed inside the envelope." Joker made some adjustments. "Eye of the hurricane, hu?"

Shepard walked over to the docking doors. She wanted to give the ID tags a squeeze, but they there well protected beneath the layers of armor and cloth she wore. Garrus and Jack were ready to go. Shepard had talked Jack into wearing a bit more clothing. The leather top she now wore hid the skin, but not her curves. Shepard would take what she got. The girl wasn't stable. Garrus stood at her side, ready for anything. She was glad to have him with her. She resisted the urge to look at his face and find the security she needed to be there. She was as much a bastion for him as he was for her. She couldn't allow him to see her weakness.

Shepard rounded the first corner making certain the muzzle of her rifle went first. Vakarian was close on her six.

"Exploring an abandoned area, expecting something mechanical and nasty to jump out at any moment. Just like old times..."

"Was that supposed to make me feel better? 'Cause it didn't." Jack said in her usual tone.

Shepard hacked a few credits from a wall save before crossing over to a terminal on the other side of the room. There was a recording from one of the officers on the team. At the end of the corridor there was another console with another officers recording. Both stories gave Shepard chills. She took a few medi-gel packs from the wall and moved toward the doors to the main ship. When they opened both ships shuddered violently.

"Normandy to shore party." Joker's voice came over the com.

"What just happened?" Shepard asked, succeeding in hiding the alarm from her voice.

"The Reaper just put up kinetic barriers. I don't think we can get through from our side."

"So, we're trapped. Great." Said Garrus.

"We'll have to take down the barriers from in here. Any idea where the controls are?"

"At the moment of activation, I detected a heat spike in what is likely the wreck's mass effect core." EDI responded. "Sending the coordinates now. Be advised. This core is also maintaining the Reapers' altitude."

"So when we take the barriers down to escape, the wreak falls into the planet core."

"And that means everyone dies. Yeah, got it." Said Joker.

"If any helmsmen can pull us off this thing before it reaches crush depth, it's you." She hoped to the Fates she was right. "We'll make a sweep for survivors and recover what data we can. Stand by."

"Aye, aye. Good hunting." Joker pushed the standby button and leaned into his chair.

Shepard nodded to her team and they moved in. Mangled corpses lay on the floor, barely recognizable as ever havering been human.

"Looks like we missed the party." Jack commented.

Shepard shot her a look through her visor. There was another console. It had a recording of two crewmen discussing a memory. One they both seemed to think was their own. Shepard was officially creeped out.

"Sounds like they were being indoctrinated." Garrus said. He felt at ease about as much as Sonya did. He knew because she kept grabbing at her chest only to have her fingers glance off the armor.

"Nihlus, I can only do so much," He thought. "She's going to need you're help." He didn't know if the dead turian could hear him, but he hoped he could and that he was able to do something about it.

"Let's move on."

A few steps down the ramp Garrus thought he saw something, but when he looked there was nothing there. Shepard passed a tank full of explosive matinal when a husk crawled over the edge of the catwalks.

"Look out!" He shouted and fired a round into it's face, sending back down into the darkness below.

"I wondered if the husks had been Reaper or Geth technology. I guess now we know."

Shepard retreated up the ramp, Garrus and Jack followed, sending fire out as the backed up the incline. Shepard waited for a group of them to converge near the tanks then shot several rounds into the tanks. The resulting explosion took out the remaining husks.

They ran down the ramp and passed a console. It didn't matter what it said. She knew what was going on. The started up the ramp on the other side. Three shots came from the next room taking out three husks that were waiting for them.

"Sniper! and a damn good shot." Garrus said.

"One of the survivors?" Shepard wondered allowed.

"Don't count on it." Piped in Jack.

Shepard cautiously rounded the bend. There were two sets of stairs, one against each wall. She took the short flight of stairs nearest to her to the main floor. Jack took the other. There was no one there.

The room was daunting. Large crates lined the railing. She could see dragons teeth off bow of the balcony. They were not unadorned.

Garrus came up behind her, close enough that he could lean down to her ear and whisper.

"I don't like this, Shepard. I've got a bad feeling."

Shepard nodded. She'd come to trust his 'feelings'. Especially when her gut agreed with him.


	15. Blowing Something Up, Again

Husks crawled over the ledges and ran toward them, some of them in flames. The sound of Jack's shock wave boomed across the battle field. Shepard threw several back over the edge to their second deaths, her body surrounded with blue flame. The large abomination inching toward them send it's own shock wave at them, knocking Shepard off her feet. Husks were on her like flies on manure. She fought her way free only to be knocked down again by another blast from the abomination. Garrus fired a concussive shot over her head followed by several rounds of shedder ammo as he ran to her aid, his shields nearing their limit. He hit one with the butt of his rifle and used his powerful claws to rip one off her back. She scrabbled to her feet, shooting behind her as she and Garrus retreated. Shepard was screaming at Jack.

"Fall back! Fall back!"

But the stubborn girl didn't listen, over confident in her abilities. Burning with her own blue light Jack pulled her target in for a point blank shot. She didn't see the husk running to flank her. Shepard fired, but her bullets did not take the husk down before it knocked Jack unconscious. Shepard refocused on the abomination. She would have to see to Jack after they survived.

Garrus and Shepard took turns blowing up the few tanks that were in the room as the creature passed them, taking down each husk one at a time.

"Garrus, take cover by the other stair. I'll cover you while you line up your shot. Go!"

She had a plan to draw the abomination's attentions while he got it's head in the sights of his sniper rifle. She gave him three inferno rounds. That would have to be enough. It was the last three she had with her.

Shepard ignited into flames as she ran down the stair sending a wave of biotic rage at the creature. It certainly got it's attention. She emptied the last of her pistol ammo into it's face. She heard the shot before she saw the monster's head catch fire. It had only taken one round. The thing melted onto the floor, screaming. Shepard backed away in horror.

It took her a minute to open her eyes after Shepard applied medi-gel to the wound on her head. Not long after, Jack was back to her bitter, angsty self. Garrus found her more irritating than interesting, but they shared some opinions. Her idea of a solution was different, though, and more violent. Uncaring of the innocent that might suffer.

"Are you ok?" Shepard asked her.

"Yeah, ya. I'm fine. I don't need you _mothering_ me." Jack spat at the Commander.

"Good to see nothing's broken." Shepard retorted.

She didn't help Jack get up. Instead she walked passed her to the next set of doors. She had to hack through them.

"I hate fighting through dead sentient ships." Garrus was trying to lighten the mood. "They're worse than hospitals."

Shepard smiled.

"I'm sorry, Garrus. They were all out of gardens, electronics shops and classy antique stores."

Garrus grinned behind her, his mandibles spread wide enough to show teeth. It didn't hurt to smile anymore, but he kept the bandage on for good measure.

The area on the other side was empty. No husks. Just a few crates. Shepard wasn't taking any chances. She motioned for Jack to take cover on the right behind a crate. She took a few more steps when she felt the soft sound and slight wind on her cheeks of bullets passing over her shoulders. Behind her she heard something hit the ground. Husks. Some one just... She spotted something a dozen meters away. It was a geth.

"Shepard, Commander." it's mechanical voice echoed over to them.

Garrus looked at Shepard then back to the geth. It was gone.

"Talkin' Geth, hu? That's new." Said Jack. She resumed her cover position.

"Geth never operate alone. Aren't they smarter the more of them there are? We should watch our backs." Suggested Garrus.

"It just helped us... I need to know more..." Shepard cut herself off when husks started climbing over the ledges.

More husks and more abominations. Shepard was getting worried they might not make it off the boat alive. But she would never admit that. Not to anyone. She hacked another door. It was an air lock. The info the science team had gathered was inside, but not the science team. Shepard assumed science team had not survived. She moved on. When the doors to the core opened their path was blocked by a energy field. They could see the geth manipulating a console in front of the core. Half a dozen husks were making their way toward it. It shot the closest ones in the face. Their heads exploded. It finished doing whatever it was doing and lowered the field for them. When it turned around a husk hit it, knocking it to the ground and off line.

"We need to get to that console." Instructed Shepard, and she let the bullets fly.

All she had left was her assault rile and Cain. She didn't even remember grabbing it off the armory table, but here she was and it was on her back. When they'd cleared the main walkway Shepard ran to the console, careful not to trip on the geth.

"Cover me!" She shouted.

Her team nodded to her.

She hit a few buttons and the armor around the core opened. Husks were swarming over the ledges on the lower decks. They would over take them soon. Shepard unclipped Cain and took aim at the heart of the core.

"Hold on to your shit!" She had no idea what this thing was going to do. She pulled the trigger.

Everything was engulfed in a bright white light. It knocked out her shields and sent her sprawling to the floor. When she could see again, everything had a red tent to it. She got up and ran over to the geth. It had helped them. Probably saved their organic asses. She noticed it had N7 armor on one side.

"I want to bring it." Shepard told Garrus when he ran up to her.

"I think that's a bad idea, Shepard. We've got enough problems."

"Why not bring it? Carve it up for a lamp!" It was Jack's turn to be the funny one.

"Tali said no one's ever captured a geth in tact." Shepard said.

"Sounds like fun. I'm not carryin' shit, though." Said Jack.

She didn't wait for Garrus to protest. Shepard hoisted it onto her shoulders. She stumbled. It was heavier than she thought it would be.

Garrus shook his head and took the other side of the machine. He helped her drag it to the platform where the Normandy was waiting for them. Jack provided the cover fire. Every husk left was coming out of the steel work. The docking doors opened. Sonya and Garrus hurled the geth across the gap and onto the Normandy.

"Go, Shepard." Garrus cocked his head toward the Normandy. "We'll cover you."

"No, I'm not getting on until everyone else is safe. I'm not arguing about it."

She turned and fired into the growing number of husks running at them. Garrus' mandibles twitched but he made the running jump across the gap. Jack didn't have to be told. Shepard fired off a few more rounds before turning heels and running to the Normandy.

"We're clear. Go." Shepard said into the com.

Joker didn't respond with words. The Reaper was exploding. He was gettn' his baby outta there.

Miranda wanted Shepard to turn the geth over to Cerberus. Jacob just wanted it gone. Shepard managed to piss them both off when she told them she was keeping it and going to reactivate it to talk to it. She really had a way with people.

Sonya stopped to talk to Garrus before talking to the geth. Doubtless he would be upset with her for bringing it abroad.

The doors hissed open.

"Shepard." He turned to face her. "Need me for something?"

"Got a minute?"

"You know I'm just going to tell you that you're crazy for bringing that thing on board."

"EDI has put up extra fire walls. She's prepared to resist any hacking attempts. I've got it under armed guard and behind a security field. We can always fill it with holes if things get out of hand." She assured him.

"I just hope you know what you're doing." He eyed her closely. The scars on her face had completely healed, leaving the skin smooth and creamy like it had been before. Her dark eyes peered up at him, her face framed in the almost white-blonde glow of her hair. It was easy for him to see why Nihlus was so protective of her and had loved her so deeply.


	16. Geth

"Ten hut!" The soldier saluted Shepard as she approached the geth.

"I'm turning this thing back on. Be ready." Shepard ordered the guard on duty.

"Aye, aye."

She examined it briefly before activating her omni-tool. She taped a few buttons. Electricity shimmered over the geth, but nothing happened. She taped a few more. Another wave.

The light that was central to it's 'face' lit up with a piercing glow. It's servos whined as it sat up, perhaps running a self diagnostic, before seeing Shepard and standing up to face her. Shepard waited a few seconds to see if it would do or say anything. It didn't.

"Can you understand me?"

"Yes."

The mechanical sound of it's voice processors echoed in the small space.

"Are you going to attack me?"

"No."

This was not an unexpected answer because of it's actions on the Reaper... but it didn't answer why it did not simply shoot her instead like any other geth. But this one talked, no other geth did that either.

"You said my name aboard the Reaper. Have we met?"

"We know _of_ you."

"You mean I've fought a lot of geth." Shepard said, lowering her tone.

"We have never met." It's light followed her like a giant eye.

"No, you and I haven't" Shepard paced. "But I've met other geth."

"We are all geth, and we have never met you." It matched her stride. "You are Shepard, Commander. Alliance. Human. Fought Heretics. Killed by Collectors. Rediscovered on the Old Machine."

"Old Machine. You mean the Reaper?"

"Reaper. A superstitious term originating with the Protheans. We call those entities Old Machines."

"What do you mean 'heretics'?"

"Geth build our own future. The Heretics asked the Old Machine to give them the future. They are no longer part of us. We were studying the Old Machine's hard ware to protect our future."

That created more questions than it answered.

"Are the Reapers a threat to you too?"

"Yes."

"Why would they attack other machines?"

"We are different from them. Outside their plans."

"You seem to know an awful lot about me."

"Extra-net data sources. Insecure broadcasts. All organic data sent out is received. We watch you."

"You watch _me_ or you watch organics?"

"Yes."

"Which?"

"Both."'

Shepard felt nervous. Why would the geth be watching?

"What future are the geth building?"

"Ours."

"Will anyone else be affected by whatever it is you're doing?" Shepard was learning to hate interrogating a machine.

"It they involve themselves, they will."

Shepard took a step toward the energy field between herself and the geth. It matched her movements.

"So, you're not aligned with the Reapers?"

"We oppose the Heretics. We oppose the Old Machines. Shepard, Commander opposes the Old Machines. Shepard, Commander opposes the Heretics. Cooperation furthers mutual goals."

The metal plates on top of it's 'head' lifted in a way that suggested expression. Shepard wondered if it was meant to be the geth version of a brow lift.

"Are you asking to join us?"

"Yes."

Shepard needed little else to convince her that having a geth on their side would be an advantage. She wondered how far off the deep end Tali was going to flip when she found out. Shepard used her omni-tool to lower the field.

"Then what should I call you?"

"Geth."

"I mean _you_, specifically." She tried not to sound to irritated with it's narrow view of her question.

"We are all geth."

"What is the individual in front of me called?" She said each word clearly and separately to try and be more precise. She crossed her arms.

"There is no individual. We are geth. There are currently 1,183 programs active within this platform."

"My name is Legion, for we are many." EDI appeared next to her.

"That seems appropriate..."

The geth's facial plates twitched as it accessed relating information.

"Christian Bible, the gospel of Mark, chapter five, verse nine. We acknowledge this is an appropriate metaphor. We are Legion, a terminal of the geth. We will integrate into Normandy."

Shepard offered her hand. The geth mimicked her gesture, but did not take her hand. It did not seem to understand the concept. Shepard took it's hand and shook it.

"We anticipate the exchange of data." said Legion.

Shepard nodded and left. She would continue to ask it questions later. Right now she needed to talk to something organic.

"So, how'd it go?" Garrus asked as the doors hissed open.

"Have you ever tried having a conversation with you're console?" She asked pointing to his keyboard. "Because that's what it's like, only worse."

Garrus shook his head and laughed. He turned to her, madibles spread wide in a smile.

She was leaning against the rails looking down at the metal tubes and servos of the guns below. She used on hand to push a few locks of hair that had fallen out of place behind her ear.

"Do you want to go down to the hanger? We've been so busy lately we've missed our exercises the last few days." He suggested.

Sonya grinned a little.

"Ok. Let's go."

She changed at met him in the bay. They had begun practicing a harder level of 'turian chi' together that involved cooperation of two people. It was meant to strengthen and unify combat teams. It worked.

Sonya felt closer to Garrus than she'd felt with anybody, save one. It was hard for her not to think of him as that one from time to time, enjoying the feel of his plates, the roughness of his touch, the occasional accidental scratch. It all got her blood flowing. She often felt the exercises were closer to fore play than training. She would be ready to throw him down and have her way with him when his blue face paint or more subtle eye color would remind her that he was not Nihlus.

She wasn't disappointed by the blue paint or the softer eyes. She loved him too. Garrus had a tender heart and needed her just as much, but he was different. He didn't sound the same. Didn't move the same. He had a harder, more sarcastic edge. There was something that was pure about Nihlus. She missed him.

Shepard was breathing heavily. So was he. She was perspiring through her white tunic. The pungent oder that came with it was intoxicating to him. He'd noticed that her pheromone levels would escalate during practice. Then she would suddenly pull away and make an excuse to shower and get back to work. This time she didn't do that.

Sonya halted in the middle of a move that brought her face inches from his. Garrus stopped in response to her hesitation.

"Is there something wrong?" he asked.

"No." She breathed.

Sonya righted herself and waited for Garrus to do the same. He was looking at her, confused. She put a hand over the scars on his face. He didn't pull away. For a moment he just stood there, then he nuzzled her palm. She brought his face to hers and tenderly kissed him mouth. He responded as best he could. Turian lips aren't as pliable as human's.

Garrus' heart raced in his chest. He didn't know if he should leave his hands at his side or wrap his arms around her. So he simply returned the gentle kiss. It was only a few seconds. Then she smiled at him and thanked him for coming down here with her before taking the elevator back up. He watched her go. She was still struggling with the memories of Nihlus. He knew she always would. But he held his own place in her heart. For him, that was enough.


	17. Calm Before the Storm

A 'Heretic' station. What fun. They got to blow up a lot of geth and 'make' new 'friends'. Shepard had decided to rewrite them. Not the choice he might have made, but she hadn't agreed with him on taking the damn thing aboard in the first place. Tali had absolutely flipped her lid about it. And had refused to go on any missions with it. She'd have to buck up when they got to the Collector base, if they got to the Collector base. It would take all of them to bring it down.

The IFF was nearly installed. They entire team was going with Shepard to a small settlement for restock of supplies and some fresh air in the shuttle. Tali sat in the cockpit so she wouldn't have to look at Legion. She didn't want to hear anymore about how the geth were cleaning up her home world and taking care of the planet until her people returned. Lies. It was all lies. Wasn't it?

The console beeped with an emergency message from the Normandy. Tali opened the message. Her eyes grew wide behind the mask.

"Oh, keela." she breathed. She forwarded the message to Shepard.

Seconds later the shuttle banked hard and speed off back to the Normandy. The Collectors had boarded the Normandy. The crew, save Joker, was gone.

Shepard resisted the urge to squeeze the ID tag around her neck. Instead she assumed a military stance, hands clasped behind her back, to hide the fact that she was squeezing Garrus' talons. She was scared, and worried and needed his support.

Garrus stood behind her an a little to the side. Everyone was squished in the Kodiak as it was, so it didn't look suspicious when she grabbed his claws. It surprised him, but he held his posture and face in a somber manner. He almost smiled that she had turned to him for support instead of clinging to the ID tag. He squeezed her hand back and held it until the shuttle docked inside the hanger.

"Miranda, it wasn't his fault. Joker did the right thing. I'm going to go get our people back. I need everyone at their best. It's not an order, but you should apologize to Joker before we hit that relay."

Shepard was in Miranda's office after confirming the order to head to the Omega-4 relay. The IFF was installed and EDI was in control of all the vital systems left unmanned. And she was not happy with the Cerberus operative's actions in the debriefing room.

"I would have done things differently." Miranda seethed.

"Yes, and I would have a control chip in my brain." Shepard shot back.

Miranda narrowed her eyes at her.

"We'd probably be sans a ship if Joker hadn't done what he did." Shepard continued. "He's a bloody hero."

Shepard left without waiting for Miranda's reply. She went directly to vent to the empty private space of her cabin.

"Good thing I never bought any fish.." She thought callously.

Garrus pulled off the dirty uniform he wore and showered in the common lavatory on crew deck. He didn't bother locking the doors. It was unlikely that anyone left would be walking in any time soon. They were on their way to the Omega-4 relay. They were probably all going to go down with the base in an unmarked blaze of glory. He'd given her a week to cool down and collect herself after the Collectors had boarded. They still had a week to go before they would be on the door step of the enemy base. It was now or never. He eyed the bottle of wine next to the clean clothes he'd brought with him. He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. He'd done his research despite her previous experience. He didn't want to sent Sonya into anaphylactic shock. He'd asked Dr. Solus about it and gotten some tips from him, including erogenous zones. The Doctor gave him creams to reduce discomfort and chaffing as well as pain killers for Sonya. Garrus wasn't sure she would need them. After all, he wasn't her first turian... and that hadn't seemed to be an issue then. He kept them any way just in case. Dr. Solus had also forwarded informational vids to his console in the batteries, but he didn't watch them. He wanted Sonya to be the first nude human female he'd ever seen.

It was the end of another long work day of routine drudgery. Sonya turned the water off and dressed in the shower room. She nearly dropped to the ground in attack stance when she left the lavatory and saw someone standing there waiting for her. It was Garrus. He was dressed in his 'Sunday best' and held a bottle of wine. She grinned and crossed her arms.

"Hey, I brought wine. Best I could afford on a vigilantes salary." He cleared his throat and ran over to the intercom controls.

Garrus punched a few buttons, setting her cabin speakers to play some techno. He swaggered , he hoped appealingly, over to the tanks. He thought the water might compliment his eyes. Sonya grinned and walked over to him.

"If you were a turian I'd be complimenting your waist or your fringe. So... you're, uh, hair looks... good and your waist is very... supportive." He paused a moment. She wasn't responding. He started to panic. "Hopefully that's not offensive in human culture..."

"Whoa, consider me seduced, smooth talker..." She teased and went over to the controls, turning the music off. "Now shut up and stop worrying." She smiled at him.

"I just..." His mandibles flexed nervously. "I've seen so many things go wrong, Sonya. My work at C-Sec, what happened with Sidonis... I want something to go right. Just once. Just..."

He trailed off when Sonya moved in close to him and caressed the scars on his face. She was looking deeply into his eyes. The warm, dark brown of them stirred a heat in him.

"It's ok, Gare. This _is_ right... for us. Theses next few days may be the last moments of life we can share." She paused, looking up at him, wondering how much she should tell him. "I want you to know that it's not just stress relief for me..."

Sonya's eyes glanced up to his forehead and then back to his eyes. His heart rate increased dramatically. If she wanted to bond with him, she must love him. She had all but said the words. It would change things between them. They were more like friends than anything else, but they were about to share themselves with the other. He remembered what Nihlus had said about creating another bond and her ties to the turian After. It would be as much to protect her as to love her.

Garrus lowered his head to her and nuzzled his forehead against hers, their eyes locked. All the emotions he'd felt, all the thoughts and feelings that she'd awakened in him welled up to the surface. She nuzzled him back. He caressed her shoulder with his free hand.

Sonya eased the bottle of wine from his grip and went down the stairs to the two glasses on the low table by the sofa. She pulled out the cork and poured the golden liquid into the glasses. She set the bottle on the table and re-corked it. Then handed Garrus a glass.

"Should we toast or something?" He asked.

Sonya just smiled and took a sip. The wine was crisp and fresh on her tongue with a hint of sweetness. It smelled like honeysuckle and white citrus.

"This is nice stuff, Garrus." She nodded to him rasing the glass.

Garrus took a sip. Wine was never really his thing.

"I'm glad you like it."

Sonya slipped her hand into his and led him over to the edge of the bed. Garrus downed the rest of his glass. Sonya emptied hers as well before setting both on the desk. She paused a moment before taking the tags from around her neck and setting them on the desk next to the glasses. She let the scared finger linger on Nihlus' ID. She would always love him. She would always be his, first and foremost. She hoped it was possible to join him in death. She may soon find out.

Garrus wasn't surprised at her skill in removing turian clothing. She had to help her remove her own. He noticed the lack of scars from Nihlus. Cerberus must have 'repaired' them. They apparently had missed the ones on her right hip. He traced the marks gently with one talon. He looked at her in surprise and uncertainty when she took his talon in her hand and moved it up to her ribs and pressed the claw into her skin, dragging it along the contours of her torso. He watched as a thin ribbon of crimson blood followed the trail of his talon. He could taste metallic sent of it on his tongue. His desires were over coming his nerves. He heard Sonya inhaled sharply with the pain she had come to enjoy. He took control and continued the line down the definition of her abs and along one side the "V" that lead to her sex. She whispered his name when he removed his talon from her skin with a flick of his wrist, finishing the mark with a curious curl ending in a point above her mound.

He quickly knelt and wrapped his talons around her back, drawing her body close to his face. He started at the curl and ran his tongue up the ribbon, tasting her blood, taking her essence into him. Listening to her moan would suffer the mild allergic reaction if it came. His body responded to his want. He felt his folds moisten and his need extend out of him, hard and throbbing.

She arched her back as Garrus' tongue slid up the side of her body. She let him lift her onto the bed as he lay his body over hers. His breath was hot on her skin as he nipped at her breasts. She moaned a little louder, encouraging him. He tenderly fondled one of her breasts, his thumb accidently carving a crescent shape onto her rib. She cried out and arced her back, putting her hands on either side of his head and guiding his tongue to the wound. He eagerly lapped up the blood.

He was fully erect. He carefully eased his talons over her to the moistened area of her body and rubbled her with the pad of one finger. Her soft folds were open and dripping. His caress made a wet sound as he tentatively pressed his digit against the hard, swollen nub of her excitement. The action made her moan loudly and she tried to close her thighs over his hand. Garrus shifted his weight and hooked her knees over his hips. She locked her ankles together behind him. He kept one his talons on her thigh as he leaned over her and pressed his forehead to hers. He positioned himself to enter and hesitated.

"Garrus," she breathed, and wrapped her arms around his neck, caressing his fringe. "I need you!" She lifted her hips toward his. "Please..." Her eyes to look into his.

He gazed back at her, his blue eyes telling her how he felt for her, how nervous he was... how much he wanted her.

"Love me." She whispered.

It was all the encouragement he needed. The wet sound of his entry was drowned out by their moans. He eased each rib of him into her so he wouldn't hurt her. He was thankful the Cerberus had not repaired everything, she was spared that pain. Once he knew that, he entered her more quickly and completely. Her body arched into him as she cried out, digging her fingers into the plates on his shoulders. He purred his pleasure. Keeping his forehead on hers, he nuzzled her as he loved her, enjoying the feel of her breath on his face with each moan. Loving her harder when she called out his name. Purring to her in response when she rolled her hips against him.

He watched himself thrust into and out of her. Watched her flesh rise and fall around where he penetrated her. Her inner walls caressing him and tightening around him every time she flooded him with her climax. His own breathing, heavier and laden with groans and growls of ecstacy.

He slipped his face over hers, mindful not to scratch her, to nuzzle and lick her neck. The sent of her filled his senses, the sweet smell of her skin, the floral odors in her hair, the new exoticness of her musk that waft up to him from their loins.

There was a fire in her belly. His thrusts sending her over the edge. He was very vocal. It heightened her own experience to hear him groan and purr. His talons gripped her shoulders from beneath, digging into the skin of her color bone. His mandibles were fluttering by her ear. He was trying to resist biting her. She would have to coax him.

Sonya used her leverage over his hips to force him deep into her. It forced a cry from her lips and fluid from her body. She heard him cry out. His grip on her tightened, drawing blood. She closed her eyes and nuzzled his forehead with hers then turned her head to expose her neck to him. He took the bate, pushing himself hard into her as he sank his teeth into the muscle between her neck and shoulder. She couldn't hold back the scream. He didn't let go right away. His pace increased. Her mind was frantic with ecstacy. Her orgasms became more intense, blinding her in waves of light.

She didn't know how loud she was moaning, but she could feel how soaked the bed was beneath her. She opened her eyes to look into those of her turian lover. She half expected the white clad face from long ago with the fiery green eyes. She found the soft blue-green of Garrus' eyes with the simpler blue markings. She kissed him, stroking his fringe. It was easy to love him, comfortable.

Garrus desperately sought her eyes with his, cradling her face in his talons. He pressed his forehead to hers. He was close. The intensity was growing in his loins. Her body trembled beneath him.

His release was powerful. He arched into her, growling with extreme pleasure. She could feel him filling her, throbbing inside her. Her body joined his orgasm. He relaxed, but held himself over her, still panting. He rested his forehead on hers. She smiled up at him. He smiled back. He could feel her heart beating hard and fast as surely she could feel his do the same. She lifted her chin to kiss him. This time her tongue ventured into his mouth. She could taste her blood on his tongue as well as his own tangy flavor and a hint of the wine. He pressed his hips into hers. He was still fully inside her hard as stone.

The kiss grew more passionate. Garrus rolled his hips against hers, eliciting soft moans from his human lover.

He wove his talons into her hair, cradling her head. He made sure she was pinned beneath pushed hard against her cervix, feeling it resist then give way to his presence.

She cried out in pain, arching into him and griping his shoulders. She almost whined his name,

"Garr..us... ah."

"Are you in pain?" his voice purred into her ear.

She panted a few moans, waiting for her body to adjust to him. He was slightly smaller than Nihlus, but after years of not being with anyone, it was a small comfort. He still filled and spread her to her limit.

"I'm ok..." She breathed.

"Mmmm... Good." He purred again and nuzzled her neck.

He pumped himself in and out of her slowly, always past the point of resistance. The sound of her wetness around him increased his need for more. He took her hands from his neck, then forced her arms beneath her. Using their combined weight to hold them in place. He put a hand back on one thigh, digging his talons in slightly, and returned the other to her hair. He'd always wanted to touch her hair. It was smooth and silky, nice to touch. The strands slipped through is talons as she writhed under him, groaning with soft complaining moans.

Eventually her zenith came like a slow stream of water. It was hot on his skin. Her lips were swollen around him. Her thighs were red with tiny scratches from his plates. He pushed himself, slow and hard, into her one last time as he released his seed into her inner most parts. He throbbed inside her. It seemed to cause her pleasure because her walled squeezed him tighter when he did. Sex with turians was not like this. This was much more intense with euphoria and involved less combat. He lifted off of her enough to release her arms. She rested them on the pillow above her head.

They lay like that. Breathing each others air, looking into each others eyes with their hips pressed together until he receded out of her and back into himself. Every ridge that left her sent quivering waves of bliss through her. His leathery folds were open wide to accept him back in. Her body was open to his. When the head of him left her the lubricating fluid of his body drained into hers, hot and watery, before the folds closed.

He rolled over onto his back, taking her with him. He held up his head so she could adjust the pillows under his neck so he could lay back comfortably. Her breasts danced in front of his face as she did so. He liked a pink nipple with his tongue before she lay on his chest. She giggled. It was strange to hear such a sound from her.

For a long while she lay on his chest looking into his sea colored eyes. He caressed her face, nuzzled her, played with her hair. She ghosted her fingers over his fringe and his scars, remembering the day. They listened to the quiet hum of the ship, the water sloshing in the tanks, the sound of the other's breathing.

"How long?" She asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

"About week." he replied, thinking she meant until they reached the relay.

She looked at him confused. Then smiled.

"No," She laughed lightly. "How long have you love me? and not the sex."

He looked into her eyes. Wondering how honest he should be with her as well as himself.

"Dr. Saleon. At least that was the beginning of the turning point. I guess it hadn't matured into something beyond platonic until you found me on Omega."

She didn't say anything. She just pressed her forehead to his then kissed him. Her lips said more in that way than her words could have.


	18. Gentle Love

Over the next week, daily rituals didn't change much. They still got up and went to the hanger for chi every morning. Sonya was able to concentrate now that they'd gotten everything in the open. They ran diagnostics to make sure all the upgrades were fully integrated. Reading reports and writing them. At night Garrus stayed with Sonya in her cabin. The first night they'd finished off the bottle of wine and passed out holding each other on the bed. Other nights, Shepard listened to Garrus' stories from his time on the Citadel after the destruction of the Normandy or Omega. Some of them were funny, others were unsettling, but she was glad he shared them with her. Then they usually fell asleep together after a bout of slow passion.

Shepard had several interesting conversations with the geth. After the Heretic station, Tali had caught him about to send classified information from her omni-tool to the rest of his people. Shepard broke up the potentially volatile situation by telling them to quite fighting or the whole galaxy would end up paying for it. They had agreed and Tali let Legion send non-classified info.

Now that Shepard heard what the geth were doing beyond the Veil, she wans't convinced that either side was completely in the right. The geth didn't even live on the quarian home world. A few stayed there and were cleaning things up from the wars. They were caring for the planet in the quarians absence, not taking it over. All the quarians had to do was go home. There was no need for war between them. On the other hand, the geth were building a planet sized sphere to house all their programs and memories. Essentially creating one giant geth that would have enough information and collection of experiences to achieve consciousness the way Legion had done. Only it would be infinitely more intelligent. The thought was disquieting.

Joker heard the Commanders foot steps coming up the steps to the cockpit. He turned around just as she came up behind him.

"Hey, Commander."

"Hey, Joker. How are we doin'? What's the ETA?" She asked. She glanced out the view ports and back to Joker.

"Well, I'm fine. EDI's got it all under control."

"Are you doing _anything_?" She teased.

"Yeah, I'm, uh... running some diagnostics and... Hey, ya know I think that's enough questions."

Shepard grinned and shook her head.

"ETA's about two and a half hours. Better get ready." Joker turned back to his console.

Shepard nodded and headed to her cabin to suit up. Garrus was there waiting for her.

"So, were going through the gates of hell in two and a half hours." Sonya told him when she entered the room.

"I always wondered why the Omega-4 relay was red." Garrus teased.

"You'd better suit up." She ignored his humor.

"It doesn't take two hours to put on armor, Sonya."

"I know." She collapsed on the sofa.

Garrus took a seat next to her and slid his arm around her shoulders. She leaned into him with a sigh. They both knew what the other was thinking. They both knew what the other wanted so say. So they said nothing. When Sonya shifted in his arms to look up at him with tears threatening to well up in them, he wrapped his other arm under her knees and lifter her off the sofa. Sonya instinctively grabbed his neck for support. He found her eyes with his and nuzzled his forehead to hers, then carried her to the bed.

"Gare, I don't know if we shou..."

She was cut off by a talon to her lips.

"I'll be gentle this time. I promise." He wasn't going to bite or scratch her before such a critical mission.

He carefully removed her clothes and then his own. The ID tags around her neck slipped on the chain to rest on the mattress by her shoulder. He settled at the end of the bed, spreading her knees apart and tentatively nuzzling her soft, fleshy pink folds with his muzzle. He heard her breathing deepen. Her smell was strong and musky. It was like smelling a goddess. He could still smell himself on her from the night before. It roused him and his turian-hood quivered inside him with desire as it began to push through the moistening leathery folds.

He continued to nuzzle her lower lips apart, enjoying the blush it brought to the area. Wetness soon coated the folds and his mouth. He let his tongue lap up the juices, sweet and tangy. He explored her desire, lingering wherever she moaned the loudest. The swollen bud that exposed itself was extra sensitive to the texture of his tongue and he liberally abused that information. He had to wrap his arms around her thighs and hold her in place because she started bucking her hips at his touch. The accompanying moans and increased wetness only urged his desire for more. He let his tongue wander to her entry and then inside it when her moans encouraged him. She was hotter and sweeter there than anywhere else. He buried his muzzle in her for deeper access, finding her g-spot and rubbing his tongue in rhythmic pulses over it until he was rewarded with the flow of nectar he sought. The moan she released was just as sweet to his ears as the honey from her body was to is taste.

He was fully roused and positioned himself over her, hooking her legs over his hips and cradling her head with one hand the way he liked to do. He pressed his forehead to hers as he slowly guided himself into her, feeling her folds caress him and the tightness of her sex resist his advance as he pushed himself into her hot, sticky hole. He didn't hold back his own groans as the last length of him entered her, pushing past the cervix into her deepest parts. She cried out beneath him, grabbing at his shoulders. His talons left her thigh to take her hands and hold them under the pillow above her head. He liked the way it made her breasts look when her arms were stretched above her like that. Her hardened pink nipples danced and grazed his plates with each thrust.

Sonya would have to remind herself to have a chat with him about his idea of 'gentle'. While she throughly enjoyed his sex in all it's forms, slow and hard was not what she would call 'gentle' when it was a turian doing the deed. Garrus may not have had quite as much girth as Nihlus, but his reach was comparable to that of an elcor. He was very insistent on penetrating her as deeply as he could manage. It was painful for her until she came at least three times to produce enough fluid to ease his persistence. Luckily, those orgasms came quickly under his learned talents.

Her body trembled with ecstacy. Waves of euphoria blinded her with each climax expressed by a new gush of fluid onto her turian lover. Her loins were on fire from the heat of their passion. His thrusts lifted her hips from the bed. She cried out in loud moans. His breath was hot on her skin. His growls and purrs were in her ears, sending shivers down her spine. She kissed him, tasting herself on his tongue. Her body arched against his hard, metallic plates when he pushed deeper into her. She could feel his stone like maleness throb his need inside her. His smell was earthy and spicy. Her heart beat hard in her chest. Her breath came in desperate pants. Her forehead moist with his sent, making her skin tingle. She looked him in the eye when she came for him, groaning his name.

"Garrus..."

She closed her eyes for a moment as the blinding light of bliss flashed through her mind. Garrus purred at the sound of his name spoken in passion from her lips and pushed deeper into her. He growled as his release came pulsing to him, filling her with his orgasm.

"Ah... uh," She gasped.

He exited her slowly letting his fluids pour our of her, causing her to shudder beneath him, then re-entered her more quickly than he'd left. He continued to pump her and she continued to moan and cum on him as he slowly receded from her body.

"We should shower." She breathed after a time of recovery.

"Yeah, you're probably right." He agreed, and helped her up.

She often had trouble walking after one of their encounters. The first time it happened he'd thought he had injured her, but she was quick to console him and assure him it was a good thing. He wasn't sure how being temporary paraplegic was a good thing, but he was proud that he could do that for her.

They washed each other under the warm water. Sonya enjoyed watching the way the water reacted differently on her than on him. Garrus just liked to see it run in rivets down her body and cascade off her curves. He traced a talon thoughtfully over the long scar that ended in a curl. The first of only a few marks he'd left on her. He felt her hand on his face and looked at her.

"We will stop the Collectors." She said. She knew that wasn't what he was thinking, but she didn't want to voice it.

"If anyone can stop them, it's you." He paused, letting his talons fall to his sides. He shook his head, shaking water droplets off the tips of his fringe. "That's not what I'm worried about."

Her brow furrowed and she took a step closer to him. Garrus took her in his arms and closed his eyes, feeling her warmth against him. Sonya slide her hands up his back rested her head on his chest. Closing her own eyes, she listened to the rhythm of his heart until she felt the ship drop out of the relay jump to the Omega nebula. They needed to get ready, soon... but not yet.


	19. Through the Gates of Hell

Shepard stood behind Jokers chair, arms crossed, watching the readouts on his console display and looking out the window toward the red glow of the Omega-4 relay. Joker hit the intercom button.

"Approaching the Omega-4 Relay. Everyone stand-by."

"Let's make it happen." Shepard said. Her eyes narrowed at the relay.

The Illusive Man was nervous about the trip. She figured it was mostly because he couldn't keep tabs on her once she went through. She offered him a spot on the team, but he had 'regretfully' declined, spouting something about her value as an asset to humanity. She saw through his line of crap, but it didn't mater. She was doing this for the lost colonists and her crew. She was doing this for herself and her people. She was doing this because no one else would and because, as a Spectre, it was her duty. She was doing it for Nihlus, because she'd lost him due to the Reapers and the Collectors worked for the Reapers. She was doing this because she'd found love in a friend and she wasn't going to give that up a second time. Not with out a fight.

Joker punched in the IFF and sent the signal.

"Reaper IFF activated. Signal acknowledged." EDI's voice rang throughout the ship.

"Commander,"

Jacob's voice came in over her com.

"Drive core just lit up like a Christmas tree."

"Drive core electrical charge at critical levels." reported EDI.

"Re-routing..." Joker said. His fingers danced over the console display board.

The ship came along side the relay. Red arcs of energy jumped to the Normandy and flung her into space. Shepard grabbed hold of Joker's head rest.

"Brace for deceleration." the AI advised.

Seconds later the ship abruptly slowed it's speed as she was dumped into a debris field.

"Aw shit!"

Joker immediately altered course to avoid a collision, pulling the Normandy strait up through the debris dodging scrap and large pieces of destruction. She rose above the floating wreckage like a phoenix from the ashes.

"Wheooo" Joker sighed his relief, falling back into his chair. "Too close."

Shepard looked out the windows. She could recognize what some of the debris may have once been. Mostly it was twisted metal and long lost technology burned to a crisp.

"These must be all the ships that tried to make it through the Omega-4 relay. Some look... _ancient._" commented Joker.

"I have detected an energy signature near the edge of the accretion disk." Informed EDI.

The accretion disk was a burning mass in the center of her vision. The Collector base silhouetted against the blinding light.

"Has to be the Collector base. Take us in for a closer look, nice and easy."

Joker maneuvered thorough the debris toward the unmoving cylindrical mass.

"Careful, Joker. We have company." EDI warned.

Joker quickly runs a scan to detect the stealthed enemy. The Normandy's sensors detect weapons fire. A rumble rolls through the ship as the port side takes a hit. Joker's face twists into a grimace. How dare someone fire on his girl!

"Taking evasive maneuvers." He alerts the crew before taking a swooping dive away from the spherical bots firing on them. They follow suit.

"Now they're just pissing me off." He turns on them and shoots two of them and flies between them as they explode.

"EDI, take these bastards out!" He shouts.

Two more oculars explode off the port bow, but more arrive from hiding in the debris.

"They wanna another round? Common girl, let's give it to 'em!"

The Normandy's secondary weapons fire. Joker evades the red beams of enemy fire.

"Alert! Hull breach on the engineering deck." EDI brings up an image of the ship and a target over the invaded area.

"It's in the cargo hold!"

"I'll take a team and deal with the intruder. You get the rest of them off our tail."

"Aye, aye, Commander."

Shepard heads down to the main hold. She hits the com on her omni-tool.

"Vakarian, Taylor, we have an intruder in the main cargo hold. Meet me in the elevator."

She stops by the armory to grab the Collector particle beam. If anything was going to take that thing our fast, this was it. Jacob was gabbing his own choice weapons.

"Common, Taylor. Let's go." She motioned for him to follow. He nodded and fell in behind her.

Garrus entered the elevator stern and ready to fight, gun in hand. He took up the empty position on Shepard's flank.

"I'm ready to go, Commander." He spoke a little slower than usual. His tongue was slightly swollen with a minor allergic reaction.

The elevator doors closed. The ship shook with more impact fire, nearly throwing them to the floor. Garrus reflexively reached out and put a talon around Sonya's waist to steady her. She nodded when she'd regained her balance.

The machine was larger than she thought it would be. She took point. Garrus and Jacob took cover to flank the intruder. She had time to notice the huge holes this thing had put in her ship. At least the emergency containment barriers were working.

"Draw it's fire. Then I'll hit it with the beam." Shepard shouted.

A spray of bullets pelted the armored sides of the ocular. Shepard waited for it's attentions to turn before rising out of cover and firing the Collector's weapon. She managed to take down it's shields before it turned back to her. It fired. She threw herself to the floor to avoid the beam. It cut through the crate she'd just left in half.

"Get it off me!'

"I'm on it!"

She waited for the sound of gun fire before checking her line of sight. She dropped back to the floor in time to save her helmet from being melted to her skull. She herd the sound of an over load pulse being fired from an omni-tool. She checked her shields, they were at full. Her shields could only take a few seconds of direct fire from the ocular before they would fail and she would die. She stood and fired, keeping aim and holding down the trigger. The ocular turned back in her direction and prepared to fire. Stress fractures began to appear on the surface. She wasn't going to stop now. The red glow of a building beam was collecting in the center of it's 'eye'. It was going to be close. A shower of gun fire weakened it from behind. The read glow of the beam fizzled out.

"It's gonna blow, take cover!" She shouted.

Shepard jumped over a generator tube to take cover behind the generator box. Garrus was already there. She didn't have time to check Taylor's status before the ocular blew.

"Hopefully it stays dead." Garrus remarked.

"Better get back up here, Commander. We're about to clear the debris field." Joker said over the com.

"Back to your stations." ordered the Commander.

Moments later Shepard was back on the Command Deck at Joker's side. Miranda was on deck, staring out the view ports.

"There it is. The Collector base."

It was at least as big as the Citadel.

"See if you can find a place to land without drawing attention." Out of habit, Shepard rested a hand on the head rest of Joker's chair.

Joker's console beeped.

"Too late. Looks like they're sending an old friend out to greet us."

Something long and rough extended out from the base and altered course to intercept them. Shepard glanced at the readings. They confirmed what she already knew. It was the same ship. The one the Illusive Man had sent them to, knowing it was a trap. The one that had taken the colonists on Horizon because Alenko was there, simply to draw her out. The same one that had destroyed the original Normandy, leading to her death.

It fired on them. Joker easily evaded and taunted his enemy by flying just below the beam. Shepard clinched her jaw.

"Time to show them our new teeth." She growled. "Fire the main gun."

The Thanix Cannon was a master piece. The guns fired what looked like a comet with a brilliant blue tail. The impact on the Collector vessel tore the plating from the hull in a huge explosion of fire.

"How do ya like _that_, ya _sons_ of _bitches_!" Joker shouted with his arms raised in a ball court taunt.

"Get in close and finish them off." Shepard ordered. She was going to enjoy seeing that ship join the wreckage that floated around them.

"Everybody hold on... gonna be a wild ride!" Joker warned.

He turned hard to starboard and swung up above the Collector vessel. He turned the Normandy into a sharp turn, down toward the center of the craft.

"Give 'em hell girl!" He encouraged his only love, then slammed his fist into the firing button.

The guns fired, blasting through the ship and breaking it in half. Shepard enjoyed the moment of satisfaction. It was short lived.

"Look out!" Miranda shouted.

Explosions were coming in waves from the Collector vessel, sending large debris flying at them at critical speeds. Joker skillfully avoided the chunks of metal. Another explosion sent out a wave of heat and fire, hitting them full force. The ship was slapped sideways. Joker frantically scrambled to regain control. Something was wrong.

"The mass effect field generators are off line!" He announced.

"EDI... give me something!" He called out in desperation.

"Generators unresponsive." EDI responded. She opened the ships coms, "All hands brace for impact."

A piece of the Collector ship slammed into the Normandy' aft section. She careened helplessly then bounced across the surface of the station leaving spars and fire in her wake. Gradually she began to skid to a stop. Her underbelly glowing red with friction.

Consoles crackled and sizzled. Electrical wires popped with blue sparks. Shepard lay across the floor. Her eyes trying to focus on something, anything. She saw Joker hanging over the side of his chair.

"Joker, are you ok?"

She forced herself off the floor.

"I think I broke a rib..." He sat up and groaned. "Or all of them... ahhh."

"Multiple core systems overloaded during the crash. Restoring operation will take time."

"We all knew this was likely a one way trip." Miranda sighed behind her.

"I'm willing to do whatever it takes to stop the Collectors, but I plan to live to tell about it." Shepard rebuked her.

"I'm glad _you're_ in charge." Joker remarked. "What's next?"

"Is the ship safe here?"

"How long until the Collectors find this landing zone?"

"I do not detect a internal security network. It is possible the Collectors did not expect anyone to reach the base." EDI replied.

"Well, if we're lucky,"Joker looked over his shoulder at Shepard. "and their external sensors were hit like we were, they might not know we're alive."

Shepard crossed her arms and looked out the dusty view ports. The surface of the station was heavily plated. The light from the accretion disk reflected off the metal with a searing orange brightness. It reminded her of the sunset. She thought of Nihlus, suddenly remembering the words he'd spoken to her in the After. She clinched her jaw. It was not 'sunset' for her. Not yet.

"Joker, you and EDI get this ship back on line. Miranda, gather everyone together in the briefing room. We need a plan."


	20. The Plan of Attack

Miranda and Jacob were cleaning their weapons. Shepard saw the looked on Jacobs face when the two looked at each other in a silent communication. It seemed there was more there than She might ever know. She again thought of Nihlus, and the secret of their love they had kept... that she continued to keep from those that would use it for ill. Then she looked to Garrus. He was loading his guns with specialized ammo. She had little reason to hid a relationship with him. If they lived through this, she would not let anyone else's' opinions stop her from finding happiness with him.

Commander Shepard took her position at the head of the console table. She leaned on the edge with both hands. Her team was assembled before her, ready to thwart the Collectors.

"This isn't how we planed this mission, but this is where we are. This was why they were all here. We can't worry about whether the Normandy can get us home. We came to stop the Collectors, and that means coming up with a plan to take out this station." She paused for only a second before hailing the AI."EDI, bring up your scans."

A 3D schematic of the Collector base appeared in the center of the room. Garrus intently studied the hollo for any strategic weaknesses. EDI's voice came over the intercom.

"You should be able to overload their critical systems if you get to the main control center here."

A blue indicator appeared near the top of the schematic. Jacob activated his omni-tool.

"That means going through the heart of the station, right past this massive energy signature."

The central chamber in the image changed from an orange to a blue glow.

"That's the central chamber. If our crew or any of the colonists are still alive, the Collectors are probably holding them in there." said the Commander.

Jacob taped on his omni-tool again.

"It looks like there are two main routes. Might be a good idea to split up to keep the Collectors off balance, then regroup in the central chamber." His words materialized on the glowing Collector base model with blue indicators.

"No good, both routes are blocked. See these doors? The only way past is to get someone to open them from the other side." Miranda pointed out the flaw in his plan.

"It's not a fortress, there's got to be something." Shepard said as she leaned on one elbow to examine the schematic on her console. "Here, maybe we can send someone in through this ventilation shaft."

A blue marker appeared on the main model.

"Practically a suicide mission." Jacob narrowed his eyes at the image. "I volunteer."

"I appreciate the thought, Jacob, but you couldn't shut down the security systems in time." Miranda stated calmly. "We need to send a tech expert." She looked to Shepard. "It's your call, Commander. Who do we send into the shaft?"

Shepard rested both elbows on the console in heavy thought; "Jacob has volunteered, but he is a solder, not a tech. I agree with the bitch on that. Mordin is practically a savant, but his expertise lie in the biological. Garrus can sabotage most systems, but his tech skills are not enough for _Collector_ tech. Tali is revered as a mechanical genius, even among her own people. She thrives in the face of technical problems that require intelligence, and if she dies I won't have to listen to her complain anymore." She pushed the thought aside. It wasn't a fair assessment. "Thane had agreed to come partially because it was a suicide mission and he felt that would help exonerate his past. He has experience with ventilation shafts..." she almost laughed at that being a qualifying trait. "Legion! He_ is_ tech. He has already demonstrated the ability to hack into Reaper tech on the derelict. He's a machine. Sentient or not, if he's destroyed then it isn't a loss of organic life." She looked back up and found the geth among her remaining crew. She stood up right.

"Legion, you can hack through anything. You will go into the shaft."

The geth nodded.

"The rest of us will break-up into two teams and fight down each passage. That should draw the Collectors' attention away from what you're doing." She said, nodding to Legion.

"I'll lead the second fire team, Shepard. We'll meet up with you on the other side of the doors." Miranda moved to take her rightful position as second in command by Commander Shepard's side.

"Not so fast, cheerleader. Nobody wants to take orders from you." Jack pointed a finger at Miranda. Garrus nodded in agreement.

"I don't want you leading the second team. Half of us don't even _trust_ you." He said pointedly.

"This isn't a _popularity_ contest." Miranda cut the protests down, slicing her hand through the air. "_Lives_ are at stake." She looked to the Commander. "Shepard, you need someone who can command loyally through experience."

"Miranda is second in command on the ship, but I can't have the team second guessing the person in charge." Miranda looked a little disappointed and returned to her previous spot next to Jacob.

Shepard thought immediately of Garrus. _She_ trusted him, and the rest of the crew seemed to as well. He was excellent under fire and had the experience of heavy combat. As a side effect this may improve his confidence, damaged from the betrayal.

"Vakarian, you're in charge of the second team." She nodded to him.

He nodded back, indicating his acceptance. He seemed to physically swell with pride and gratitude. He held her gaze for a moment, a knowing look in his eye. She felt she could almost hear him say; 'Thank you, for this, Shepard.' The way he once had only a couple years ago. It seemed like ages.

"Well, at least he knows what he's doing." said Miranda with a shrug. She'd noticed him leaving the batteries every night and taking the elevator. It wasn't her business, she just hoped it wasn't affecting the Commander's decision.

Commander Shepard started to pace. She needed to instill her team with confidence they didn't feel. Her own nerves were on edge. What could she say that would give them courage? What could _words_ do to inspire them and make them _believe_ that this _was_ possible and they would_ live_ to see another day? Sonya's eyes flicked to Garrus. The brief eye contact steeled her resolve.

"I don't know what we're going to find in there, but I won't lie to you... It's not going to be easy. We've lost good people. We may loose more." She took up a position central to the wall and assumed a military posturer, hands clasped behind her back.

"Once we're in there, they're going to throw everything they have at us. Be ready!" She looked each of her team in the eyes as she spoke.

"We don't know how many the Collectors have stolen... thousands, hundreds of thousands. It's not important. What matters is this, Not One More!" Shepard made definitive slicing motions with one rigid hand on each word.

"That's what we can do, here, today. It ends with us." Her speech carried over the com to Joker sitting at the helm.

"The Collectors attacked our ship. They took our crew, our friends. They think we're helpless. They're wrong. They want to know what we're made of? I say we show them, on our terms." She angrily pointed a finger at the orange glowing representation in the center of the room.

Garrus thought loved her more in that moment than he had only an hour ago. She was going to kick some Collector ass.

"We're going to hit them hard, and hit them where they live." A fire burned in her eyes.

"Let's bring our people home." She paused then added,

"Solus, Krios. You're with me."

The drell and salarian each nodded to her, then left the com room.

Shepard rounded the table, she locked eyes with Garrus. He turned to her. They didn't need to say the words. The unspoken communication between them spoke volumes.

He briefly nudged her forehead with his, savoring those few seconds before turning to the door. His determination solidifying in his gut.


	21. Garrus is Hit

Shepard opened the doors jumped down to the rocky, debris littered surface. The crunching sound beneath her boots rang hollow in her ears. Thane was close behind her, then Mordin. Shepard looked over a pile of rubble to where Garrus' team was dropping down from the rear air lock. Jacob jumped down first, then Legion. Garrus followed suit with the rest of the team behind him. She made eye contact with each of them. Jacob simply nodded. He was ready for battle. Legion was an unknown. His expression plates remained smoothed back.

Garrus. He was ready for battle. Hell, he was ready for war. He saw her looking over to him. They made eye contact. It was only a few seconds, and he was meters away, but they both felt the moment. They both felt the other one pleading with the ancestors for the life of the other. Asking the spirit of their teams to protect them and aid them against their enemies.

"Don't die."

She whispered the words. He nodded and tapped a talon on his chest.

Thane had kept stride with Shepard. He would not let harm come to her, no matter the cost. He'd made a promise to Garrus, and he intended to keep it.

Thane looked at Shepard. She was focused on the task ahead. He turned his gaze to Mordin, who he found looking at him as well. They exchanged glances that only occur between those prepared to die together, then looked back to Shepard. Their confidence, hope and survival depended on this unique human woman.

Shepard got Vakarian on the com. Her heart raced in her chest.

"Is your team in position?"

"We're in. We'll meet you on the other side of those doors, Shepard." He sounded more confident than he felt in his own ears. He hoped it gave her strength.

Artillery, biotics, tech explosions of fire and ice. Blood spilled, but not theirs. Legion worked his way through the ventilation with Shepard's aid as she slammed her body into each valve release, shooting Collectors all the while.

She and her team reached the doors. The didn't open.

"Look out! Seeker swarms!" Vakarian shouted to his team.

He ran in through the open doors then joined Tali and Samara in providing cover fire for the rest of the team. He herd Shepard on his com.

"Come in!"

Legion had made it through and was working on closer the doors.

"We're in position. We need this door open, Now!" Shepard was starting to feel panicked.

Vakarian looked to the doors then to the geth. He pushed it's shoulder, urging it to the other door.

"Go, we'll cover you."

Legion ran to the other doors, working quickly to open them.

"The door has malfunctioned. Path blocked."

A loud boom came from the other side of the doors. Garrus' heart skipped a beat. He resisted the need to look at the doors. He had to trust Legion. He had to trust that Thane would not let her die, that the soul of Nihlus was protecting her. He heard the doors open and released the breath he hadn't realized he was holding. A collector's face exploded in gore with a round from his rifle.

Shepard and her team slipped in through the narrow door way, turning on their heels to return fire to their pursuers. Legion worked to closed the doors again, making the clicking sounds Shepard had heard many times before. It gave her chills. She ignored it. There were more pressing matters.

"Here they come!" Shepard shouted, backing in an firing her weapon. "Fall back!"

Tali finished closing the doors Vakarian's group had come through. The turian ran to the other doors.

"Suppressing fire, hold the door!" He ordered.

The Collectors fell like dominoes. The rest of the team's cover fire converged though the small gap of the door while Legion hacked they system. One charged the doors using it's the bodies as cover as they fell. Garrus saw him and lined up the sights, taking it out just before it would have burst through the door way. Just as Legion got them closed.

"Nice work, Legion. I knew I could count on you." She gave the geth a pat on the shoulder, the one with the N7 armor. It was what she would have said to an organic. She didn't know if it would have the same effect on the geth. She panted as she braced herself on her knees as much to catch her breath as to release it.

Legion looked at her. She assumed it either appreciated the comment or was compiling some sort of concensus based on her need to inform him of her confidence.

"Shepard, you need to see this..." Garrus' voice called to her.

Shepard looked over her shoulder and went to where he stood. He led through a short hall that opened to a great cavern lined with Collector Pods. Huge tubes and power cables lined the ceiling. Shepard stepped toward a pod on the wall near by.

"Looks like one of the missing colonists." Garrus said, examining the woman's clothing through the strange, glass-like window. Shepard touched the surface. Some kind of vapor was seeping up between each pod.

"There's more. Over here!" Shouted Thane.

He'd found the crew. He was standing in front of a pod that held Kelly Chambers. A liquid began spraying out near the bottom of the pod.

Shepard looked back to the colonist. Suddenly the woman opened her eyes and looked around, panicked.

The colonist focused on the human image outside her pod. She screamed and started banging on the window.

"My god! She's still alive!" Shepard breathed.

The Commander pulled on the lip of the lid, trying open the pod. Something was dripping inside. Blood splattered the window. Shepard's movements became more frantic.

"Get them out of there! Hurry!"

The colonist was screaming and... shrinking? Shepard watched helplessly as the woman melted before her eyes. Panic threatened to set in as she ran to the pods containing her crew.

Garrus had employed the butt of his rifle. He was hammering the window of engineer Ken's pod, making cracks in it that eventually shattered.

Thane grabbed each side of the lid of Kelly's pod and pulled with all his might, preying to Arashu in staggering breaths. The pod opened with a hiss. Kelly fell out of the pod. Thane grabbed at her, trying to ease her to the ground.

Shepard pulled off a lid, retrieving Gabriella. Miranda was working on Dr. Chakwas' pod. It reluctantly released the doctor to Shepard's arms.

"Dr. Chakwas, are you alright?"

The elderly woman was paler than usual and very faint. They had very little time to recover.

Shepard sent Dr. Solus with the rescued crew back to the Normandy. He could begin their treatment immediately upon arrival.

Shepard took a small team with her. They had to take a dangerous route to the central chamber that was infested with seeker swarms, too many for the Doctor's counter measure. Samara would provide a biotic field of protection for them. Shepard left Vakarian to lead the second team once more. A diversion team that would head through the main entrance. She waited until Mordin and the crew were safely through the doors toward the Normandy.

"Zaeed and Krios are with me, everyone else go with Vakarian."

Garrus nodded to her. He knew why he was in charge of the second team. He was the best tactical choice. But that didn't stop him from wanting to be by her side. She needed him to have her back. It's what gave her the strength to press on. Her confidence in him was plain in the look she gave him before the teams parted ways. She tapped her chest. His mandibles flexed and he tapped his own.

The swarms interfered with radio contact between the teams. That made Shepard nervous. They moved forward. Samara had to take cover as they fought off waves of Collectors and possessions of Harbinger, which were getting really annoying.

Thane was always close on her six providing her with cover fire. He made sure every bullet hit the mark, which was usually the head of a Collector. She could hear him muttering prayers between targets. Zaeed provided a steady rain of grenades and profanities. They pressed on.

The team made it to the exit. Zaeed was working the controls to shut the door. Shepard and Thane provided him and Samara cover fire until she could get through. The Justiciar was weakening from the strain of keeping up the barrier against the masses of seeker swarms. Shepard backed in past the thresh-hold as Samara gathered her strength. Krios soon followed

Before the door closed Samara redirected the barrier throwing it into the charging Collectors, hitting them as if it were a wall of steel.

Shepard had never seen rage on Samara's serine face. It was not a look she wanted to be at the other end of.

Shepard nodded to Thane. He nodded back. Their relationship was a good one. A simple one. She was glad to have him as a team mate and a friend. She would miss him after his natural passing.

Seconds later Garrus' voice reached Shepard's com. The interference was gone.

"..pard, do you read me? Repeat, Shepard, do you copy?"

"I copy. What's your position?"

"We're pinned down at the door, taking heavy fire!"

"We're coming. Just hold on!" She and her team ran to the doors flanking them. Her heart was in her throat.

Samara took charge of the controls.

"Get this door open!" Shepard shouted to her.

Samara worked quickly. The door jerked open to a narrow gap. Enemy fire soared through the gap like a rushing river. Garrus' team backed in quickly, firing back at the Collectors, their shields singing with the impact from Collector bombardment.

"Close the doors!" Shepard shouted.

One las bullet zinged across the distance before the door snapped shut with a hollow boom. Sonya saw Garrus stumble backward into the wall. He was holding his side. He was hit. She ran to him.

They locked eyes. Fear was at the edge of the concern in her face. He pushed though the pain. He wouldn't do this to her, not again. His suit delivered a healthy dose of medi-gel. He stood up right and nodded to her.

"I'm fit for duty..." He said, echoing the words spoken when he joined her team after Omega. She smiled at him in relief and pressed her forehead to his.

"Don't do that to me," She whispered.

He briefly let a talon caress her face before they walked over to where the rest of the team was gathering. Shepard halted in front of the group. Vakarian continued passed her, as strong and proud as ever. Miranda appeared at her side.

"Joker, are you at the rendezvous point?" Shepard said into her com.

"I'm here, Commander. Chakwas and the rest of the crew just showed up."

"Mordin's group just arrived, Shepard. No casualties." EDI confirmed.

"Excellent," said Miranda. "Now let's make it count." She touched the com in her ear. "EDI, what's our next step?"

"There should be some nearby platforms that will take you to the control console. From there you can overload the system and destroy the base." EDI replied.

"Commander, you've got a problem," interrupted Joker. "Hostiles massing just outside the door. Won't be long 'til they bust through."

Shepard hopped up onto one of the platforms. She faced her team. They had done well so far. She was proud of them, even if this was as far as they got.

"A rear guard could defend this position and keep them from over whelming us."

"Pick a team to go with you, Shepard. Everyone else can bunker down here and cover your back." suggested Miranda.

Shepard considered, for a moment, who to take with her. Samara's skills may come in handy. Garrus would most certainly want to be by her side But Garrus was a strong leader and excelled in battle. She wondered if she could afford to take him with her and risk the strength of the defense team. She glanced in his direction. He stood, talons clasped behind his back. He caught her eye and nodded. He would understand if she left him in charge, but she could see that he wanted to go with her. He was anxiously shifting his weight from one foot to the other and rolling his shoulders.

" Samara and Vakarian will come with me." She looked to Garrus. It only took a second of eye contact and she knew he understood what she was thinking.

Samara hoped onto the platform followed by Garrus. They took up positions to either side of her flank.

"I am ready, Shepard." said Samara, in her usual serene tone.

"I'm ready, Shepard." Garrus added. He held her eyes for mere seconds that seemed like days. If it was his time to die, he was glad it would be with her.


	22. RockABye Baby

Shepard turned to address her team for what was possibly the last time. They looked tired and dirty, but they were strong and confident. Confident in her and gleaning their own confidence through her.

"The Collectors, the Reapers... they aren't a threat to us. They're a threat to everything, everyone. Those are the lives we're fighting for. That's the scale. It's been a long journey, and no one's comn' out without scars."

Grunt punch his fists in agreement and excitement.

"But it all comes down to this moment. We win or loose it all in the next few minutes. Make me proud. Make yourselves proud."

Shepard nodded to her crew below as she activated the platform and floated off toward the central chamber. They passed through a large oval-shaped opening on there way. One of several that made swiss cheese of the walls around them. A large window the same size and shape of the 'door ways' exposed a breathtaking view of the accretion disk. Moving past it, Sonya was in awe. Garrus was looking at the view as well. He took a step to stand beside her and took her hand in his. They didn't look at each other as they passed by the window.

Samara looked on with curiosity. She found humans to be an interesting species. She never expected one to love a turian, given the history between the two species. It inspired her to see the two, so very different, standing together in the end.

When the window was passed them, Garrus released her hand and took up his weapon, his sharp eyes had seen something.

"Here they come," he shouted, and pulled Shepard down into cover behind him.

Platforms of husks and Collectors were inbound to cut them off. With gunfire and explosions they fought their way through. The Collectors possessed by Harbinger were vaporizing into ash. Blue biotic flames rippled over Shepard as she threw several over the edge of the platform.

Garrus was liberal with the shredder ammo,snipping them while they were still incoming. They were making good progress. Suddenly the attacks stopped. Shepard made her way to the furthest platform, picking up dropped ammo along the way. Taking the new platform, the team floated downward through another large opening that had tubes threaded through it.

"Ok, this is it. All the tubes lead to this spot. EDI," Shepard hailed the AI, "What can you tell us. What are they doing.?"

"The tubes are feeding into some kind of super structure. It is emitting both organic and inorganic signatures. With these readings the structure must be massive. If my calculations are correct the structure is a Reaper."

The platform floated within view of the super structure. It's size was daunting. The sight of it chilled her to the bone. She felt the ID tags under her armor shift on her skin. She thought of Nihlus.

"I may see you soon, m'love." She thought.

As much as she loved Garrus, Nihlus would always be first in her heart.

Garrus and Samara shook their heads in disbelief. It looked like human skeleture. It hung from the walls by large injection tubes that pumped in liquefied genetic material. That was the weak point to bring it down. The platform locked into others linked together. The Reaper came groaning to life. Collectors swarmed in on new platforms.

"Take cover!" Ordered Shepard.

She ducked to a good cover position.

"Now it gets fun." Garrus growled as he took up a snipers position on a higher platform.

The bullets and biotics flew. Samara and Vakarian provided Shepard with cover fire. She took aim at the injection tubes hoping her bullets would penetrate them. One tube shattered sending fluid to the abyss below the Reaper. More platforms. More Collectors. Shepard threw a group of them over the edge. That seemed to be an extremely effective attack. Shepard shot another tube.

A Collector beam fired and a scorch mark appear just above her head. She rolled into new cover as Garrus shot the attacker in the eye, killing it, with his sniper rifle.

Samara was hit. She ducked into cover until her shields were restored. Shepard watched helplessly as she saw the asari rise from cover in a blue aura of flame. Her target collapsed to the floor, writhing and shriveling to ash. Samara's would had been healed and she seemed refreshed. It made Shepard glad the woman was on her side. That was almost as scary as the Reapers.

Two more tubes. The Reaper sagged, the weight of it pulling on the support tubes, they snapped and the Reaper fell into the pit. The station shuddered, nearly throwing them to the ground. Shepard quickly regained her ballance and tapped her com.

"Taylor, give me a status report."

"Jack here. We're taggin' 'em as they come, Shepard. Feel free to call for an exit any time!"

"Head to the Normandy." She ordered, then switched channels. "Joker, prep the engines. I'm about to over load this place and blow it sky high."

"Roger that, Commander."

Shepard ran for the core. It was time to blow this hell hole. Working fast, Shepard opened the core and was prepping it for the detonation disk. Vakarian's omni-tool beeped. It was Joker.

"Uh, Commander? I've got an incoming message from the Illusive Man. EDI's patching it through."

Garrus activated the message and a hollo of the Illusive Man appeared.

"Shepard, you've done the impossible." He praised her.

"I'm not finished here yet, This base is ten minutes from extinction." She replied, annoyed he treated her like a child or a pet.

"Wait, that may not be necessary. I have a better option. I'm looking at the schematics EDI up loaded. A timed radiation pulse would wipe out the remaining Collectors leaving the technology in tack. This is our chance, Shepard. They were building a Reaper. That knowledge, that framework could save us."

"I came here to to destroy it, but I'm listening." Shepard said, curious.

She stood up to face the hollo.

"We've won a single victory, but we're still at war. This base will give us the technology we need to fight the Reaper. Our best chance is to turn their own resources against them. Who knows what information is buried there?"

"What are you going to do with the knowledge, build your own reaper?" She said as she cocked a brow at him and crossed her arms.

"This is a gift, we can't just destroy it. Think of the potential. I brought you back so you could keep fighting for what you believed in. To keep fighting for humanity. My goal is to preserve humanity, at any cost. I've never hidden that from you. Think of the lives we could save if we do, and the lives that will be lost if we don't. Being a leader means making sacrifices. You know that better than anyone, Shepard."

That was the wrong thing to say. She instantly suspected the Illusive Man somehow knew about Nihlus. Her gut filled with rage. He was trying to use her suffering, her loss to get her to do what he wanted.

"What do _you_ know about sacrifices?" She seethed at the hollo, pointing a finger in his face. "How many people that you've _cared_ about have _you_ had to watch die?"

"You'll watch everyone you've ever known, ever _loved_, die if we don't keep this base!" He threatened.

His words rang of those that Saren had said so long ago. Only Saren was working_ with _the Reapers. The same reason, different sides. In her mind that mad the Illusive Man just as evil.

"We'll fight and win without it. I won't let fear, or you, compromise who I am."

"After all Cerberus has done for you! You...!" Garrus cut off the transition and handed Shepard the detonation disk. She took it without looking at him and slid it into place.

He might have kept the base. He agreed with what the Illusive Man had said, but he knew Sonya's thoughts as well. She would never allow the lives of those people go to waste, but worse than that would be to hand this kind of power over to someone like the Illusive Man. He didn't argue her decision.

"OK, we've got ten minutes before his place blows. Let's get out of here." Shepard said as she closed the core.

The ground shuttered, harder this time than the last.

"We've got company!" Shouted Garrus.

More Collectors were flying in and the Reaper had climbed up out of the pit, 'alive' and angry. Shepard found high ground and took cover. Garrus was at her back. Samara was taking out Collectors in waves of botic power.

Shepard sent a storm of bullets at the Reaper, hoping to hit a weak spot, while Garrus provided cover fire for their position. A stray hit one of the eye sockets, igniting a spark.

"Ok, that's it. Just like organics, aim for the head." She thought.

She took aim with her assault rifle. The Reaper was moving and dodging as it slapped way platforms. It was charging up some kind of weapon in it's mouth. She had to take it down before that thing went off.

"Take cover!" Shepard shouted over the com.

Without further warning or waiting for her order to be obeyed, she unclipped 'Cain' from her back. It would take a few seconds for the charge to build before it would fire. She hoped it worked as well on this Reaper as it had on the derelict Reaper core.

Shepard looked to Garrus as he sniped a Collector. He found her gaze. His face was stern in the heat of battle as was her own. She pulled the trigger. She would pop up out of cover when it was three seconds from firing. It only took seven. Garrus put his back to the barrier they took shelter behind. She wanted to say something, but realized she didn't need to. If this was the end, they were together. That was enough.

Shepard moved faster than ever, taking aim at the eye of the Reaper that held two cannons and Cain fired. She was temporarily blinded by the explosion. When her eyes adjusted the cavern was alight in a brilliant orangy-red glow. The tubes and roof were on fire. The internal workings of the Reaper's head had exploded and debris was flying through the air. The body tottered and fell forward onto the platforms, sending them in every direction.

Shepard's platform tipped forward until it was almost vertical. She grabbed the ledge as it tipped. Garrus had hold of the ledge next her her. The platform shuttered and his grip slipped.

Garrus was sliding to his death, frantically trying to find a finger hold and failing. Shepard let go of the edge of the platform without hesitation. If she was going to loose another one, she was going with him. The sound of her armor skidding across the floor vibrating in her head. His arm was out stretched, reaching for her. He used his feet and other arm to try and find some purchase to slow his descent.

His mind raced with panicked thoughts. Sonya had thrown herself after him. He had to stop her, had to protect her from sharing in his fate. He wasn't ready to give her up.

She caught up close enough to grab his taloned hand. She had him for a second and their grip slipped. Panic flashed over his features. His face was fear as he felt his feet go over the edge. He lost sight of Shepard. There was no thought in the seconds of weightlessness. Only the realness of impeding doom. Suddenly he felt her hand securely griped his.They halted to a stop as the platform regained some inertia and balanced out. She pulled him up just to fall and roll down the side as it tipped the other way.

Samara was sliding down the slope up right, trying to run up the side. The platform regained balance just as debris from another platform smashed into it. The platform spun wildly, crashing into other platforms. A chunk of flooring crushed Shepard to the ground. Everything went black.


	23. Not Workn' for The Man

Sonya opened her eyes to darkness. She could see herself, hear her breathing echo.

"Nihlus?"

Her voice sounded flat in the space.

"Am I dead yet?"

A familiar talon crept over her shoulder.

"No. Only unconscious." He said. "There isn't much time."

"Am I in the After?"

"No. This is... in between." He took her in his arms. He could touch her here. It wasn't his body or even his soul... only their thoughts in this place.

Sonya wrapped her arms around him, squeezing him, wishing she would not have to let go.

"Sonya..."

His chest rumbled against her ear.

"_No_." She protested before he could speak. "Not again."

"He needs you."

She looked up at Nihlus in alarm. He smiled down at her and caressed her face with one taloned hand.

"He loves you... and you love him."

Sonya's heart sank. She felt as if she had betray him.

"I will be waiting for you when you're time has come. We will be together again. I swear to you."

A single tear rolled down her cheek. Nihlus pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes as she did. He kissed her. He broke the kiss to whisper,

"Wake up."

Shepard woke. Her body ached. Something heavy pinned her to the ground.

"Garrus!"

She had to get up. It took all her strength to lift the flooring and move out from under it. Her eyes focused and she looked around. Samara was a few feet away. She had one arm hanging off the edge of the platform. She ran to her and turned her over. Her eyes blinked. She was alive and conscious. Shepard helped the asari to her feet.

"Are you ok?" She asked.

"I am... I will recover." She nodded.

Shepard looked around again. She spotted some debris on the other side of the platform. There was a body under it. She ran over and hoisted the flooring off the form. It was the turian. He wasn't breathing. She took his long, slender body, made bulky with armor, in her arms. His head rolled into her elbow. His eyes were closed, a blue stain ran from his nose.

"Garrus!" She screamed at his face.

Samara limped over to her.

"Shepard, we must leave this place."

Sonya felt his body take in a sharp breath. His eyes fluttered open, the light making the his eyes glow a bright blue. He looked at her.

He brought a taloned hand to her face. She pressed her forehead to his for a second, smiling.

"I thought I told you not to do this to me."

His mandibles spread in a grin.

She pulled him up to stand, helping him steady himself. She checked the timer on her omni-tool. They had less than five minutes.

"Do you copy?Commander... Common, Shepard. Don't leave me hangin'." Joker's voice came over her com. "Do you copy?"

"I'm here, Joker. Did the ground team make it?" Shepard answered.

There was an audible sigh.

"All survivors are on board, we're just waiting for you."

Garrus regained his feet and they started running. Samara was ahead of them. Shepard heard a sound and looked over her shoulder.

"Seeker swarms!" She fired a few rounds into the swarm. Then ran, picking up speed when she activated the 'storm' capability in her armor.

"Move! Move! Move!" She shouted ahead of her.

Shepard saw the Justiciar nearing the edge of a cliff. the Normandy was there waiting for them.

The docking hatch opened with Joker inside. He fired several rounds from his gun into the Collectors hot on Shepard's tail. He'd pay for it, but he didn't care about the bones right now.

Harbinger boomed treats or ominous warnings. Shepard didn't care which. She wasn't listening. She watched as Samara jumped the gap to the ship. Moments latter Garrus made the jump, landing firmly on his feet. The incline was steepening. She pushed herself as hard as her body could tolerate. The servos in the legs of her armor whined. A large chunk of the station fell from the ceiling, crashing into the cliff edge knocking it away. The gap was not three times he size and the Normandy couldn't risk getting closer. Joker, Samara and Garrus fired shots over her head into the Collectors. Garrus' mandibles flexed.

"You'd better help her make it across that gap." He muttered to the spirit of Nihlus.

Shepard ran up to the jagged edge and jumped. Her body glided through the air, she pin-wheeled her arms hoping to catch on some part of the ship. She started to fall. Her line of sight fell below the floor of the Normandy. Her heart leapt into her throat. Her hand clamp down on the edge of the door way.

"It's not over yet." She thought and tried to pull herself up.

She was too weak. For a second she thought she would slip off and die anyway. How ironic it would be to touch the Normandy and then plummet to her death. In that instant there was a firm grip on her wrist.

Garrus fired a shot passed Shepard just as she made the leap. His heart stopped in his chest until her hand clamped onto the Normandy. He grabbed her hand and their eyes met as he pulled her up.

"EDI, get us outta here!" Joker shouted.

The door closed and the ship turned away from the crumbling Collector base. Joker ran to the cockpit. Samara followed. Garrus embraced Sonya tightly as the ship picked up speed.

"I didn't know you could fly, Commander." He sarcastically remarked.

Sonya narrowed her eyes and smirked at him. He released Commander Shepard as she ran for the cockpit. He followed.

The Normandy's engines screamed as they were pushed to their limits. She shook her crew as she dodged debris trying to out run the shock wave following her. Heat seared her barriers and scorched her shields. Her mass effect FTL drive activated.

The Normandy hobbled back to friendly space after dropping out of FTL. They were fortunate to have survived. As badly as everyone needed to rest, it wasn't on the agenda just yet. Everyone reported to Mordin for injuries that couldn't be mended with medi-gel. Joker had broken bones all over his body. His hands were still intact and usable though, so he could fly. The shot Garrus had taken punctured his armor. The wound was clogged medi-gel from his suit, but no major damage had been done. Dr. Chakwas, and the rest of the rescued crew, were on strict bed rest for the next week. Kelly insisted she be allowed a lap top so she could still do her job to some degree. Shepard agreed, but only after she installed a program that would lock the Yeoman out after her shift was up.

It would take them a few weeks to get back to the Citadel for repairs. Until then, they would have to make due on their own. Shepard made her way to the com room, ducking under loose live wires and righting fallen support beams out of the main path.

The hollo table was undamaged. She activated the com and walked to the center of the room as the consoles lowered into the floor. She still wore her armor, filth and blood from Collectors as well as her own smeared over the surface.

"Shepard, you're making a habit of costing me more than time and money." He seethed at her hollo image.

"Too many lives were lost at that base. It's technology consumes it's user. I'm not sorry it's gone."

"The first of_ many_ lives. The technology from that base could have secured human dominance in the galaxy, against the Reapers and beyond." The Illusive Man growled at her.

"Human dominance? I think you mean Cerberus. Humanity doesn't want dominance. We want equality and peace. That's not what Cerberus stands for."

"Strength for Cerberus is strength for every human." The Illusive Man said, standing. He walked toward the hollo. "Cerberus _is_ humanity. I should've known you'd choke on the hard decisions. Too idealistic from the start. A human that bonded with a turian."

Shepard's blood boiled. He did know. He could ruin Kryik's name.

"I know more than you think, Shepard."

He must have seen the shock on her face. His face twisted into a sneer.

"I can bring him back, like I brought you back. You have to do as you're told. No more costing me valuable resources and missions for petty personal needs."

Shepard's rage burned away her hate and settled into a calm. The hard steel that was left glowed red.

"I'm not looking for your approval." She said coolly. "Harbinger is coming, and he won't be alone. Humanity needs a leader that's looking out for _them_. From now on I'm doing things my way. You can help or you can get out of the way."

"Don't turn your back on _me_, Shepard." The Illusive Man rushed at the hollo and leaned into her face. "I _made _you. I brought you back from the _dead_!" He growled.

"Joker, loose this channel."

Shepard walked away, smiling. She knew he'd come after her, but what ship was better than the Normandy? She just took on the Collector base. Let him come.

Garrus stood against the frame just outside the door way. The doors were jammed in the walls. He'd come directly from the med-bay.

"So, how did it go?" He asked teasingly.

Sonya smiled up at him and answered with a kiss.

"Worse than he hoped. Better than you think." She teased back.

He'd heard the conversation. He would never tell her that. But it filled him with pride and a new, warm feeling when she'd turned down the Illusive Man's offer to bring back Nihlus. He admired her for her resolve.

"Well, then. We'd better get this ship in shape if we're taking on Cerberus. I'm sure there's a few bugs and spy ware that survived the crash. As you know, Cerberus builds stuff to last..."

Sonya gave him a knowing smirk.

"Maybe we should test you're theory with little _sparing_ match?" She teased.

"You won't win, Commander." He teased back, mandibles spread wide in a smile.

"We'll see..."

She walked down the short corridor toward the elevators. Garrus followed.

"I'm right behind you, Shepard..."

"Or soon will be." He finished the sentiment in his head. His grin widened.


	24. Let's All Have A Good Time!

**this chapter is basically a smut scene with Sonya and Garrus to celebrate surviving the Collector base, so if you feel like getting worked up... Enjoy! ^_^**

* * *

Garrus griped her hips tightly in his talons, careful to only pierce the skin but not draw blood, using his hold on her as leverage for his trusts. Her excitement ran down her legs like water Dark stains on the sheets around her knees grew and spread until it was one big puddle. Her cries bounced off the walls. There were advantages to having you're own deck.

He tangled one hand into her hair, pulling her head up firmly, forcing her to arc her back and allowing him deeper penetration and a better view of their union. With her neck stretched the way it was, it made it difficult for her to scream or take deep breaths. Her moans were strained and short, nasally, almost an expression of pain. He loved it and growled his pleasure. He pumped her harder and faster, relishing every gushing orgasm he drew from her. Feeling her body grip him and quiver around him. Watching her flood him. He released her hair to grip her hip again. She released a loud cry of ecstacy. Her legs quivered before she collapsed on the mattress, causing him to slip out of her. She lay, panting on her stomach, unable to move.

He let her rest a moment, admiring her red and swollen wet sex that was still quivering and open where he had been inside her. He waited for her breathing to even out and her opening to relax before settling over her and pushing himself back inside. Her moan was long and pleading. His groan was just as long and wanting. He used one hand to push her white-blonde hair from her face to nuzzle her neck. She moaned in her throat, soft and sweet. He purred gently in her ear. The wetness of their passion echoed the sounds of water lapping on the shore. The leathery folds of him rubbed against the soft flesh of her own, reddening them further, causing them to swell. He slid his arms under her and wrapped his talons up over her shoulders. He slowly rolled his hips gently stroking her inner walls with his ridges. She tightened around him, moaning. Her release was a hot stream of fluid.

"Garrus... " She breathed his name.

"Sonya." He purred in her ear sending shivers down her spine, as he pushed himself passed that point of sweet resistance. Her delicate fingers dug into the mattress as she cried out.

"Ahh... no more..." She panted. "I...hu... I can't..."

Garrus withdrew himself and rolled her over. He didn't wait for her to recover this time. His entry was complete and all at once. Her back arched into him. The moan that left her lips was rough and strained. She tried to close him off from her with her thighs to no avail. He grazed his muzzle along the curve of her neck, supporting her back in the arch with his claws. He purred his bliss. He could smell her body's euphoria as it poured from her. When she stopped quaking he lay her back on the bed, panting. Her moans were complaints. He groaning, pleas for mercy. Yet, he continued, firm and slow. His need for her, his passion, unabated.

"Please... ah." She managed to whimper the plea. "By the fates... ah...wha...t do...oh" She gasped for air. "Aww, fuck... what do you...oh... wa..nt fro..uhmm...me?"

Her words came in shuddering breaths. Her fingers intertwined with his talons.

"Just you." He purred.

"You have me!" She gasped again. "Fuck! For the rest of... ah.. our lives you have me!" She drowned in the sweet release that he continuously labored to build in her. "But not if you...oh... kill me now!" Her body was on fire. It was hard to concentrate enough to talk.

"You're still holding back." He growled.

"You've taken ah... all I have." She moan.

Garrus pressed his forehead to hers, changing his rhythm. He drew himself almost completely out of her before slowly pushing himself back in to tease her cervix. Her body quivered. Her passion spasmed around him. Her moans silenced with ecstacy into shuddering breaths. When the final moment came her body erupted into blue flames that lit the room. The silent screams expressed as pain then serenity on her face. Her release sent intense waves of light through her. The flood that came spilled to the floor. Garrus plunged into her will all his might past the point of resistance, crying out his own release into the deepest parts of her. Hearing him growl his bliss, feeling him fill her with his own fluids intensified her own carnal pleasure.

He pressed his forehead to hers as the waves passed. He took moments to rest, but did not stop the tired, needing roll of his hips until he had receded into himself past the point of function. She caressed his fringe and the scars on his face. The moments they were together like this were the only times she saw him without his ever present visor. The blue of his eyes reminded her of a clear sky.

They lay next to each other and quickly fell prey to sleep. Her back to was to him, his pelvis pressed against her and his muzzle in her hair. His arm rested along her curves under her arm and his talons wrapped over her shoulder. The other arm extended under her head to hold her hand. They dreamt of peaceful days under a warm sun and grass under their feet.


End file.
